Thought for the Day: The Middle
May 19, 2003

First things first:
So I saw Reloaded and I got to thinking...I am lucky there was always a Return of the Jedi during my understanding of The Star Wars Trilogy. Otherwise, I may not have liked Empire, which is my favorite of the three. Here's why...Unless you are working from source material where you already can know the end (Hello Lord of the Rings), the Middle is always going to be one of two things, completely lame because they f*cked up the sequel before making a trilogy, or lame until you know how it fits into the grand scheme. In the former category, movies include Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, Back to the Future II, and MallRats. In the latter category, Empire Strikes Back, The Two Towers, and others. My point is, I enjoyed the middle, I am looking forward to the end.

I did like Keanu's best baseball moment ever (trumping Hardball) in that park-like thing, and I will say that the restuarant scene pushes the envelope in a very ingenious way, but honestly, I may need to see it again to see if I missed something.

Pistons go ice-cold in the 4th, still nearly win Game 1
We ain't got no alibi, that was ugly, but hey, the bounce goes the other way, the Pistons go to OK, and things get interesting.

Can Curry lead NBA union and dream of ownership?
Just an interesting question...

Spurs' request leaves Mavs fans out in cold
Uh-oh, you've gone and angered the Cuban. That's not good for anyone.

Elway fires Crush's entire coaching staff
Uh-oh, you've gone and angered the Elway. That's not good for anyone either.

Commish calls likely Big East defections 'disastrous blow'
And we're just a little bit bitter, but I suppose I would be too if I were caught holding the fiddle.

Funny Cide dominates Preakness, to try for Crown
By the way, the gelding jokes are just cheap humor. Now, if you can somehow weave a Ray Combs joke in here...

If you're a quiz bowler and you're reading this, I really could use a couple of Kidder Cup Playoff questions. Email me for details.

Speed Prank Shuts Down D.C. Parkway
It's more Keanu mania!

Hugh Jackman to Host 2003 Tony Awards
Because when I think Broadway, oh yeah, I think Wolverine.

Greenspan Takes to Airwaves with Consumer Advice
Wouldn't Mrs. Greenspan be the better choice for a TV ad?

Tech Question:
Does anyone know how you can do a favicon.ico for your Blogger blog?

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The Barker 128-Band Tournament of Champions--Day 20

Vote by logging into the comments widget or emailing me by 10:00 pm EDT TUESDAY. We'll tally and post the results then.

We may have it, I think I know what we're doing next. If you want to hear, email me and we'll discuss, because there is some potential for fraught, but clearly defined rules lessen the fraught.

OK, that is all. Thank you, and let's be careful out there.
--The Commissioner

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Yesterday's Results from the Great Lakes Regional, at Welsh-Ryan Arena in Evanston, IL
# 1 R.E.M.--38 votes
# 8 The B-52s--05 votes
Abstentions: 0
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
The widget is down, so it's email comments only...

"Whoa -- the Great Lakes regional gets the Battle of Athens! The first time I ever visited the place, the local visitors' center asked if we wanted the map for the "R.E.M. pilgrimage tour". We promptly asked if they had a B-52's pilgrimage instead. R.E.M. has its charms, but I have to vote for one of my all-time favorites, the B-52s, the band that can elevate my mood like no other, the wit collective that came up with both "Dance This Mess Around" and "Is That You Mo Dean?". Listening to their music has saved me many, many dollars that I would otherwise have spent on Prozac and Rolaids. Oh, and my doctor wants me to do exercises that make me stomp up and down, so that I won't have bone-density problems later in life. Other ladies of a certain age can have their Fosamax. When I'm 70, I'll still be cranking up my CD player in the living room on rainy days, pounding the linoleum to "Good Stuff" and "Strobe Light"."
--The BugDoctor

"Athens is crying tonight, folks. Still, as much fun as the B-52s are, I didn't listen to "Rock Lobster" every day from the time I was 12 to the time I was 15... and anyhow, with "Shiny Happy People" and "Me in Honey", I feel like I'm still voting for Kate Pierson."
--The Raging Lemur

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Yesterday's Results from the Great Lakes Regional, at Assembly Hall in Bloomington, IN
#12 Rush--10 votes
# 4 Parliament-Funkadelic--33 votes
Abstentions: 0
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
The widget is down, so it's email comments only...

"In the words of David Letterman, we've brought in the noise but the funk's stuck in traffic. Doesn't matter. P-Funk still rules this matchup."
--Cardinal

"P-Funk. Rush, to me is kinda like Annie Bellemare. I'm going to leave it to the rest of you to interpret, but here's a hint: I had gone way too long without a skating reference. Ah. That feels better."
--J-Kel

"# 4 Parliament-Funkadelic
I don't even know who Parliament-Funkadelic is, but I know I like them better than Rush. I HATE Rush, I have always HATED Rush, I will continue to HATE Rush until the day I meet my maker."
--The Scientist

"Rush – Is it wrong to hold George Clinton’s appearance in PCU against him? Probably, but I can’t help it."
--The Wizard of Babson Park

"Parliament Funkadelic for 2 reasons - 1. PCU is a great movie; 2. In 1998 my friend Jen thought the announcement on the Metro was "George Clinton" instead of "Doors Closing.""
--The Curator
(Commissioner's Note: Because of Piven, I am siding with Curator on this one. By the way, can we get Jeremy Piven and Jon Favreau in the same movie sometime? Cusack and Vaughn would have to be involved, but a good scene where the sidekicks are talking about sidekickdom in a bar somewhere, just plays very funny in my head.)

"I cannot imagine a situation in which I would request that someone play a song by Rush at a party if there was a P Funk disc anywhere in the house. That makes my decision here pretty easy. Parliament."
--Marist MU

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Yesterday's Results from the Great Lakes Regional, at the Breslin Student Events Center in East Lansing, MI
# 3 The Temptations--32 votes
#11 Genesis--11 votes
Abstentions: 0
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
The widget is down, so it's email comments only...

"Genesis - I'm continuing my no votes for group that were only vocal groups. Being so arbitrary here is very helpful since Genesis and Temptations are basically tied in terms of my musical affections."
--The One-Eyed Squirrel

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Yesterday's Results from the Great Lakes Regional, at Williams Arena in Minneapolis, MN
# 7 INXS--05 votes
# 2 The Police--38 votes
Abstentions: 0
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
The widget is down, so it's email comments only...

"The Police. One of my all-time favorite bands, even if I jumped on the bandwagon toward the end of the run."
--JQSmooth

"#7-INXS. Another little-known fact about me in the "random musical loathings" department is that I like Sting/The Police far less than anyone I know. Nearly any song by the man or the group forces me to hit the radio dial in seconds."
--The Bruce

"The Police over INXS. Does their really need to be a comment--this isn't even close."
--The DohaBoy (temp name for the Dartmouth Hoosier)

"# 2 The Police
"I see you sent my letters back/And my LP records, and they're all scratched/I can't see the point in another day/When nobody listens to a word I say." OK, so we have e-mail and MP3s now, but the second two lines still ring true."
--Mrs. Gerbil #1

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Today's Matchup from the Heartland Regional, at Allen Fieldhouse in Lawrence, KS

# 1 The Rolling Stones
vs.
# 8 The Cure

The Rolling Stones: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Street Fighting Man
Gimme Shelter
(I Can't Get No) Satisfaction
Jumpin' Jack Flash
You Can't Always Get What You Want
Under My Thumb
Sympathy for the Devil
Get Off of My Cloud
Wild Horses
Ruby Tuesday
Paint It, Black
Start Me Up
Miss You
Angie
Mixed Emotions

The Cure: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Boys Don't Cry
A Forest
Let's Go to Bed
The Walk
The Lovecats
Close to Me
Why Can't I Be You?
Just Like Heaven
Lullaby
Lovesong
Never Enough
Friday I'm in Love
Mint Car
Wrong Number

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Today's Matchups from the Heartland Regional, at Gallagher-Iba Arena in Stillwater, OK

#12 The Smiths
vs.
# 4 Public Enemy

The Smiths: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Hand in Glove
There Is a Light That Never Goes Out
Boy With the Thorn in His Side
Panic
William, It Was Really Nothing
This Charming Man
Reel Around the Fountain
Please Please Please Let Me Get What I Want
How Soon Is Now?
Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now
Girlfriend in a Coma

Public Enemy: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Welcome to the Terrordome
911 Is a Joke
Bring the Noise
Don't Believe the Hype
Give It Up
Shut Em Down
Fight the Power
By the Time I Get to Arizona
Night of the Living Baseheads
Nighttrain
Bring Tha Noise
He Got Game

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Today's Matchups from the Heartland Regional, at Erwin Center in Austin, TX

# 3 The Beastie Boys
vs.
# 6 Green Day

The Beastie Boys: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Rhymin & Stealin
Jimmy James
Sure Shot
So What'cha Want
Shake Your Rump
Sabotage
Intergalactic
Hey Ladies
Fight for Your Right
Slow Ride

Green Day: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Waiting
Good Riddance (Time of Your Life)
Brain Stew
Warning
Basket Case
Longview
When I Come Around
Macy's Day Parade
J.A.R. (Jason Andrew Relva)
Only of You
She

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Today's Matchups from the Heartland Regional, at United Spirit Arena in Lubbock, TX

# 7 Chicago
vs.
# 2 U2

Chicago: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Hard to Say I'm Sorry
Baby, What a Big Surprise
Hard Habit to Break
If You Leave Me Now
Beginnings
Feelin' Stronger Every Day
(I've Been) Searchin' So Long
25 or 6 to 4
Wishing You Were Here
Does Anybody Really Know What Time It Is?

U2: Song Highlights from AMG/CDB/SMW/DMW
All I Want Is You
Bad
Beautiful Day
Desire
Elevation
I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For
I Will Follow
Mysterious Ways
New Year's Day
One
One Tree Hill
Please
Pride (In the Name of Love)
Stay (Faraway, So Close)
Stuck in a Moment You Can't Get Out Of
The Unforgettable Fire
Ultraviolet (Light My Way)
Until The End of the World
Walk On
Where The Streets Have No Name
With or Without You

That's all for today, until tomorrow,
I'm Craig Barker, middled.

Thought for the Day: Game on!
May 16, 2003

First things first:
Sorry, Pistons are on...

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The Barker 128-Band Tournament of Champions--Day 19
Vote by logging into the comments widget or emailing me by 7:00 pm EDT MONDAY. We'll tally and post the results then.

Darn it, I shouldn't try and work so quickly. All corrections (Queen did beat the Pumpkins, Rush's songs are now up) have been made, thank you for pointing them out. As we can clearly see, I am human.

Just a reminder:
Voters should consider the following three things (in descending order) when voting:
1). Which band's theoretical greatest hits albums would you rather own/listen to?
2). Which band would you be more likely to leave on if they were going to be on the radio next?
3). Which band do you hate less?

I can't tell you how to make your decisions, I can only suggest...

OK, that is all. Thank you, and let's be careful out there.
--The Commissioner

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Yesterday's Results from the Mid-Atlantic Regional, at Comcast Center in College Park, MD
# 1 Nirvana--21 votes
# 8 Journey--20 votes
Abstentions: 0
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"Woo-hah! This matchup will have to finally bring the curtain down on Journey. I'll be glad to do my part by voting for Nirvana."
--The Bug Doctor

"Okay, so its my teenage angst vs. the fact that my teenage years were in Y102land. Hmmm... surprisingly difficult, but since I know Nirvana will win this based on that most influential song of the 90s thing, I'll be like my friend Mike, who in 1996 voted for Dole, because 'someone under 30 should' and cast my ballot for Journey."
--The Curator

"Nirvana who hopefully should destory the most fraudulent team still in this tournament."
--Dirty Midwest

"Nirvana. And if Journey wins this...well, I'm no good with empty threats, but I'll be a sad panda."
--Studio 176

"Journey, for these reasons:

1. Getting more attention is not the same as starting something. Seattle was Minneapolis circa 1986, only with airplay.

2. I feel very dirty, but this is one case where I cannot resist the cheeze that is Journey.

3. The video games -- two completely different ones for Atari and the arcade."
--Gerbil #1

"Journey. Because I spent hours playing Journey Escape on Atari and can still hear the 2600 version of Don't Stop Believin' if I think about it. And because everybody needs to re-read the rules--influence, talent (in the abstract), etc. have NOTHING TO DO WITH IT! It's about what you actually like to listen to."
--The Stepson of Troy

"Journey- As they say on stiffs.com Kurt Cobain...still dead."
--PittBill

"Journey. Now and forever. Wither thou Steve Perry?"
--SpartanSteve

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Yesterday's Results from the Mid-Atlantic Regional, at Reynolds Coliseum in Raleigh, NC
# 5 Buddy Holly and The Crickets--18 votes
#13 Prince and the Revolution--22 votes
Abstentions: 1
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"Prince, et al. Sometimes weird, sometimes cool."
--JQSmooth

"Prince and Revolution over Buddy Holly and the Crickets - It's all about the ass-less pants"
--Marist MU

"Buddy Holly and the Crickets...not becuase of their Influence, but because I genuinely prefer the music over Prince."
--Eliz

"If, according to Greg, Seattle was Minneapolis 1986, then the vote has to go Prince and the Revolution."
--BrickHouse

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Yesterday's Results from the Mid-Atlantic Regional, at Reynolds Coliseum in Raleigh, NC
# 3 Duran Duran--28 votes
# 6 The Sex Pistols--11 votes
Abstentions: 1
Oncoming Traffic: 1

Match Comments (Best only):
"I'm so tragically unhip - Duran Duran."
--The Curator

"The Sex Pistols, because Johnny Rotten was the first man in rock and roll who could say "I am an Antichrist" and have people believe him."
--GZ

"Sex Pistols. Both of these bands are overrated in their own way, but only one gave direction and a face to an entire movement."
--RickT

"As influential as the Pistols were...well, Duran Duran had more musical talent and spent more time in the spotlight. Now _that_ is a sentence I never thought I'd have to type. Give me the Double Ds."
--The Answer Guy

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Yesterday's Results from the Mid-Atlantic Regional, at Reynolds Coliseum in Raleigh, NC
#10 The Smashing Pumpkins--02 votes
# 2 Queen--39 votes
Abstentions: 0
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"Queen -- I just watched The Big One again a couple of weeks ago and Michael Moore's suggestion that "We Will Rock You" become our new national anthem makes more sense than ever with the current administration."
--The One-Eyed Squirrel

"Queen -- Without stadium anthems like "We Will Rock You" and "We Are the Champions" we'd never have had "Tonight, Tonight" used in World Series promos. An unrelated thought that makes me happy is Billy Corgan singing "Radio Ga Ga." Funny."
--The Wizard of Babson Park

"Queen. Right now, they're like Anna Kournikova at the Cloisters Cup, minus the injury. We're in the second round, Smashing Pumpkins are some no-name. Anna wins 6-0, 6-2."
--Senor TennisPants

"The Chicago rock girlie in me is screaming in agony right now, but I was never a huge SP fan anyhow. Queen could get a little bombastic, but they were good fun... and anyhow, "Under Pressure" is my finals-week theme song."
--The Raging Lemur

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Today's Matchup from the Great Lakes Regional, at Welsh-Ryan Arena in Evanston, IL

# 1 R.E.M.
vs.
# 8 The B-52s

R.E.M.: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
So. Central Rain (I'm Sorry)
(Don't Go Back to) Rockville
Losing My Religion
Radio Free Europe
Fall on Me
Driver 8
The One I Love
It's the End of the World as We Know It (And I Feel Fine)
Man on the Moon
Everybody Hurts
Country Feedback
Imitation of Life
At My Most Beautiful
Strange Currencies
Electrolite
Daysleeper
The Great Beyond

The B-52s: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Love Shack
Rock Lobster
Dance This Mess Around
Channel Z
Roam
Private Idaho
Summer of Love
Give Me Back My Man
Strobe Light
Bushfire
Mesopotamia

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Today's Matchup from the Great Lakes Regional, at Assembly Hall in Bloomington, IN

#12 Rush
vs.
# 4 Parliament-Funkadelic

Rush: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
YYZ
Freewill
Distant Early Warning
Closer to the Heart
New World Man
Spirit of Radio
Red Barchetta
Limelight
Tom Sawyer
2112 Overture

Parliament-Funkadelic: Song Highlights from AMG and JMW:
P-Funk (Wants to Get Funked Up)
Get Up for the Down Stroke
Chocolate City
Bop Gun (Endangered Species)
Flash Light
Aqua Boogie (A Psychodiscoalphabetadiscobioaquadooloop)
Big Bang Theory
Maggot Brain
Standing on the Verge of Getting On
One Nation Under a Groove
(Not Just) Knee Deep

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Today's Matchup from the Great Lakes Regional, at the Breslin Student Events Center in East Lansing, MI

# 3 The Temptations
vs.
#11 Genesis

The Temptations: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
The Way You Do the Things You Do
My Girl
Since I Lost My Baby
Don't Look Back
Get Ready
Ain't Too Proud to Beg
(I Know) I'm Losing You
All I Need
You're My Everything
Angel Doll
I Wish It Would Rain
Cloud Nine
I Can't Get Next to You
Ball of Confusion (That's What the World...
Just My Imagination (Running Away With Me)
Papa Was a Rolling Stone

Genesis: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Lamb Lies Down on Broadway
I Know What I Like (In Your Wardrobe)
Dancing With the Moonlit Knight
Carpet Crawlers
That's All
Watcher of the Skies
Supper's Ready
Misunderstanding
Turn It on Again
No Reply at All
Invisible Touch
Land of Confusion
I Can't Dance
Hold on My Heart
No Son of Mine
In Too Deep
Congo
Jesus He Knows Me

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Today's Matchup from the Great Lakes Regional, at Williams Arena in Minneapolis, MN

# 7 INXS
vs.
# 2 The Police

INXS: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Need You Tonight/Mediate
What You Need
Disappear
Baby Don't Cry
Elegantly Wasted
Mystify
Suicide Blonde
Never Tear Us Apart
Beautiful Girl
Listen Like Theives
New Sensation
Original Sin
The Devil Inside

The Police: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Roxanne
Can't Stand Losing You
Message in a Bottle
Walking on the Moon
Don't Stand So Close to Me
De Do Do Do, De da da Da
Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic
Invisible Sun
Spirits in the Material World
Every Breath You Take
King of Pain
Wrapped Around Your Finger

That's all for today, until tomorrow,
I'm Craig Barker, about to be Reloaded.

Thought for the Day: Honors Night
May 15, 2003

First things first:
Real quick...Tonight was Honors' Night at Stevenson. I love Honors Night, it's one of the few times where the hardworking kids in the schol can be feted for efforts in the classroom, volunteering, or on the athletic field. It's the best of all worlds, especially when you're not worried about a playoff game.

Great moment today: After B Lunch, my department chair walked by my room and yells "I hate my remarks for tonight, write me some new ones." In my best Toby, I yell back "I need some pie!"

So I got out the legal pad and cobbled together a quick 35 second speech which was reflective upon Adlai Stevenson himself, and which was quite good, in my own opinion, and people seemed to like them, because the trick with Honors Night...The shorter the speech, the better the crowd likes it.

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The Barker 128-Band Tournament of Champions--Day 18

Vote by logging into the comments widget or emailing me by 7:00 pm EDT FRIDAY. We'll tally and post the results then.

OK, that is all. Thank you, and let's be careful out there.
--The Commissioner

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Yesterday's Results from the New England Regional, at Dunkin Donuts Center in Providence, RI
# 1 Led Zeppelin--33 votes
# 8 They Might Be Giants--12 votes
Abstentions: 1
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
Look at the widget, we're just posting email comments for speed tonight.

"Like the urban blues of "When the Levee Breaks", Plant/Page/Bonham/Jones prove that two Johns may be better than one, but nothing trumps sounding like it's raining so hard, the world is gonna end."
--You Know Who

"I never took to TMBG, so I'll vote for Zep. Rick, once more, this one's for you."
--The Bug Doctor

"Led Zeppelin - Led Zeppelin in a landslide. I love TMBG, but Beavis and Butt-head never attempted to sing a guitar riff from "Birdhouse in Your Soul.""
--The One-Eyed Squirrel

"Without Zepplin, I would never have the image in my head of Coogan jumping out of his seat and cheering "WE DID IT! WE FINALLY DID IT!" while doing a little dance when Stairway finally beat Freebird to become the #1 song in WPDH's Labor Day top 500."
--Marist MU

"Led Zeppelin -- for the love of God, let's get TMBG the hell out of this tournament already."
--The Mathematical Bulldogg

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Yesterday's Results from the New England Regional, at Verizon Wireless Arena in Manchester, NH
# 5 Barenaked Ladies--20 votes
# 4 Metallica--26 votes
Abstentions: 0
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
Look at the widget, we're just posting email comments for speed tonight.

"Both bands are innovative in their own way, but the Barenaked Ladies never got whiney over over their royalties. "Boo-hoo the real world invaded my rock star life" well get it over it already. In the real world people steal your work all the time. I write every article my boss has published under her name but you don't hear me bitching about royalties - just the fact that I'm underpaid, which last time I checked, Metallica wasn't. Just who the f*ck do they think they are?"
--The Curator

"Metallica – Another blow for nerd rock, perhaps? I think BNL will wind up winning, which is kind of sad. They’ve really coasted the last couple times out, and it’s been a steady degression (retrogression? unprogression?) from Gordon. One could make the same argument for Metallica, except they’d be wrong. There’s a whole decade-plus of head banging, chord-crunching goodness before you have to look at Load and some of the other recent albums (though I’d put S&M in the positive category). I also fear that a BNL hits album would include “One Week,” which I don’t think I will ever be not sick of again."
--The Wizard of Babson Park

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Yesterday's Results from the Pseudo-New England Regional, at the Carrier Dome in Syracuse, NY
# 3 The Eagles--27 votes
# 6 Elvis Costello and the Attractions--19 votes
Abstentions: 0
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
Look at the widget, we're just posting email comments for speed tonight.

"The Eagles ought to advance because Mr. Costello may later have to withdraw on account of Diana Krall."
--J-Kel

"Elvis - My fiancee's name is Alison, so I have to give her props. Plus, the man did Spiceworld, which counters the South of Sunset factor for Glenn Frey. Final nail in the coffin, in college, I mentioned Glenn Frey to my then-girlfriend. She looked at me quizzically. I said, from the Eagles. She said, you know I don't like football. I really should have known much sooner that was going nowhere."
--The Jersey Gerbil

""Don't tell me you don't know what love is/When you're old enough to know better/When you find strange hands in your sweater/When your dreamboat/Turns out to be a footnote/I'm a man with a mission/In two or three editions, and/I'm giving you a longing look/Every day (every day), every day (every day), every day /Every day I write the book." If the Eagles win this one, I wish them luck with a capital F."
--Mrs. Gerbil #1

"The Eagles - I was astounded at the vehement anti-Eagles sentiment expressed in Round one. Wake up people, the complete the merge started by Carl Perkins, et al, between country and rock. You may not love them, but they are important and, thus, deserve your vote!"
--Law and Gerbil: SDV

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Yesterday's Results from the New England Regional, at The Centrum in Worcester, MA
# 7 The Jimi Hendrix Experience--28 votes
# 2 Pearl Jam--17 votes
Abstentions: 1
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
Look at the widget, we're just posting email comments for speed tonight.

"Pearl Jam. OK, so I don't like anything after Vs., but who cares?"
--JQSmooth

"The Jimi Hendrix Experience over Pearl Jam. Pearl Jam will win by a huge margin, so I might as well cast a dissenting vote. It's punishment again for Pearl Jam's covering J. Frank Wilson and the Caveliers."
--The Dartmouth Hoosier

"Until Pearl Jam appears on six covers of Guitar World per year 30 years after their deaths, this matchup goes to Jimi Hendrix."
--Cardinal

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Today's Matchup from the Mid-Atlantic Regional, at Comcast Center in College Park, MD
# 1 Nirvana
vs.
# 8 Journey

Nirvana: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Something in the Way
Smells Like Teen Spirit
Polly
In Bloom
Lithium
Come as You Are
Dive
Heart Shaped Box
Aneurysm
All Apologies

Journey: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Who's Crying Now
Send Her My Love
Separate Ways (Worlds Apart)
Open Arms
Don't Stop Believin'
Any Way You Want It
When You Love a Woman
Party's over (Hopelessly in Love)
Wheel in the Sky
Faithfully
Lights

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Today's Matchup from the Mid-Atlantic Regional, at Reynolds Coliseum in
Raleigh, NC
# 5 Buddy Holly and The Crickets
vs.
#13 Prince and the Revolution

Buddy Holly and The Crickets: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Words of Love
Well...All Right
Think It Over
That'll Be the Day
Rave On
Peggy Sue
Oh, Boy!
Not Fade Away
Maybe Baby
It's So Easy

Prince and the Revolution: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Let's Go Crazy
Darling Nikki
When Doves Cry
I Would Die 4 U
Baby I'm a Star
Purple Rain
Around the World in a Day
Raspberry Beret
Pop Life
The Ladder
Temptation
Kiss

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Today's Matchups from the Mid-Atlantic Regional, at the Smith Center in Chapel Hill, NC
# 3 Duran Duran
vs.
# 6 The Sex Pistols

Duran Duran: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
The Reflex
A View to a Kill
Ordinary World
Save a Prayer
Rio
Hungry Like the Wolf
Girls on Film
Union of the Snake
New Moon on Monday
All She Wants Is
Electric Barbarella
Come Undone

The Sex Pistols: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Pretty Vacant
Holidays in the Sun
God Save the Queen
Bodies
Anarchy in the U.K.
Submission
Seventeen
Problems
No Feelings
Liar

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Today's Matchups from the Mid-Atlantic Regional, at Cameron Student Events Center in Durham, NC
#10 The Smashing Pumpkins
vs.
# 2 Queen

The Smashing Pumpkins: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Cherub Rock
Today
Disarm
Muzzle
Landslide
Bullet With Butterfly Wings
1979
Zero
Tonight, Tonight
Eye
Ava Adore
Perfect

Queen: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
We Will Rock You/We Are the Champions
Another One Bites the Dust
Killer Queen
Somebody to Love
Fat Bottomed Girls
Bicycle Race
You're My Best Friend
Crazy Little Thing Called Love
Princes of the Universe
I Want to Break Free
Bohemian Rhapsody
Under Pressure
Radio Ga Ga
Who Wants to Live Forever
The Show Must Go On

That's all for today, until tomorrow,
I'm Craig Barker, honored.

Thought for the Day: Infield Flies and Outfield Lies
May 14, 2003

First things first:
Former U of D great Dave DeBusschere dies at the age of 62
A couple of cool things about Mr. DeBusschere:
* When the White Sox kept him on the roster during the 1960s, they had to give up a pitcher. That pitcher happened to be Denny McClain, so Dave helped his hometown team win the 1968 World Series.
* Youngest coach in NBA history when he took over the Pistons as player-coach at 24.
* He was the last commissioner of the ABA.

Miami, Syracuse, BC likely headed to ACC
If you listen closely, you can hear dominoes being arranged.

Apple's Online Music Store Sells 2 Million Songs
If you build it, they will come...

Today's highlights:
From World History:
The metaphorical prep for landing, as I laid out the schedule for the rest of the year for the kids.

From AP US History:
More Apollo 13

From International Relations:
More Thirteen Days

Random Simpsons Quote:
Fat Tony: "Ahh, my Jersey muscle."

Today's Phrase that Can Never Lead to Any Good:
Top U.S. Nuclear Lab Loses Keys, Reviews Security
There are many headlines i don't want to see...this is one of them.

Today's Installment of "I am shocked, Louie, just quite simply shocked!"
Texas Democrats Stay Put in Rural Oklahoma
It's 7:00 pm, do you know where your state legislator is?

---

The Barker 128-Band Tournament of Champions--Day 17

Vote by logging into the comments widget or emailing me by 10:00 pm EDT THURSDAY. We'll tally and post the results then.

Still rolling, read yesterday's for the announcements.

We certainly have gotten a lot of opinions, all of which raise interesting points.
Allow me to ask this question while keeping others open for discussion as well:
Some have suggested that we put music on a rest for a tournament, to allow people a chance to recharged their critical batteries. They have suggested television or sports related tournaments. My concern with this stems from my worry that I would lose some of my ardent voters if I switched topic themes. So my question is, if I switched to let's say "Greatest Sports Moment" or "Best television character", would you be interested?

OK, that is all. Thank you, and let's be careful out there.
--The Commissioner

---

Yesterday's Results from the Golden State Regional, at Pauley Pavilion in Los Angeles, CA
# 3 The Kinks--30 votes
#14 Def Leppard--11 votes
Abstentions: 2
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"The Kinks. I almost voted for the Lepp, but then I realized how ridiculous that would be. Sure, "Pour Some Sugar On Me" is the greatest rock song of the last twenty years (one lump or two?) but upon a closer inspection of the catalog there isn't much there."
--SpartanSteve

"The Kinks. Great stuff for a long time. I'm still trying to figure out why so many people love Def Leppard. I liked the stuff on Pyromania and then nothing after that."
--JQSmooth

"The Kinks - You have to give it up for a band that invented power chord rock and Britpop. Their early singles and their early 80s stuff both seem to get airplay, but for whatever reason their amazing late 60s, early 70s period seems to be very underappreciated in the US. In that time, they produced a series of four albums that are just stunning with perceptive lyrics and wonderful melodies. For these reasons, Def Lepard does not stand a chance in my book, although their best stuff is a blast and as Chuck Klosterman wrote in the book Fargo Rock City, Pyromania is the album for which Robert "Mutt" Lange "...earned the right to f*ck Shania Twain.""
--The One-Eyed Squirrel

---

#11 The Byrds--24 votes
# 6 Crosby, Stills, Nash (and Young)--18 votes
Abstentions: 0
Oncoming Traffic: 1

Match Comments (Best only):
"I powerballed the Byrds. I own two old Byrds records, plus a Gram Parsons retrospective CD, plus the Gram Parsons tribute. Is there any question which way I'm going here?

I'm also honor-bound to note that one of the more fucked-up things I've seen lately was the CSNY-scored IMAX coral reefs film. At one point, you hear a familiar sounding song with steel drums. Then you realize it's a chorus singing the film's leitmotif -- "Teach Your Children Well" -- in French."
--Studio 176

"Crosby, Still, Nash (and Young). Although the thought of perptuating David Crosby's genes leaves with the thought - Why would you want to?"
--BrickHouse

"CSNY. Mainly due to the alternative, though Southern Cross is a great song."
--The Pentagon Player

"CSNY... And umm, why were they only a 6 seed, and why isn't "Judy Blue Eyes" the first song on this list?"
--Senor BecauseThat'sHowTheMathWorkedOutThisTimePants

"#11 The Byrds--I recently read a nonfiction book called Loaded by Robert Sabbag. The book is about a guy who wants to be a rock 'n roll star. His band opens for the Byrds. After seeing the Byrds play one set, everyone in the opening band realizes that (a) the Byrds are musical geniuses and (b) nobody in their band will ever be anywhere near as talented. The band breaks up on the spot. The guy ends up becoming the biggest and most innovative dealer of high-quality pot in North America. Then things get really weird. Craig, you'd like it, although I don't think you could recommend it to your students."
--Mrs. Gerbil #1

---

Yesterday's Results from the Golden State Regional, at Haas Pavilion in Berkeley, CA
# 7 Diana Ross and the Supremes--27 votes
#10 Lynyrd Skynyrd--15 votes
Abstentions: 1
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"Supremes. I don't hate all Skynyrd songs ("Workin' For MCA" and "I Ain't The One" rock the house), but I do tend to dislike the ones I hear most often. Since I would like to keep this appropriate for a family audience, I'll refrain from commenting on "Sweet Home Alabama."
In my world, classic rock stations would play "You Keep Me Hangin' On" or any of a dozen Stevie Wonder songs as often as they play "SHA" in this world."
--The Answer Guy

"Skynyrd. Any band that can churn out a redneck anthem AND a gun-control anthem deserves points for complexity."
--Gerbil #1

"Skynyrd. Yeah, I powerballed the Supremes but that was more for historical reasons. I had no idea they'd face Skynyrd."
--RickT

"The Supremes, because other than Cam Bonifay, nothing has ruined more Pirate games for me than "Sweet Home Alabama" winning the audience applause contest to pick between-inning incidental music."
--The Stepson of Troy

"Supremes (Joe makes the point against Skynyrd)"
--The Good Doctor

"# 7 Diana Ross and the Supremes
Phil writes 'em; Diana (sorry, Ms. Ross) sings 'em."
--The Mentor

---

#15 The Allman Brothers Band--10 votes
# 2 Creedence Clearwater Revival--32 votes
Abstentions: 1
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"'It went on for hours and hours...like the Allman brothers Band!" too long for me, CCR has it despite lacking a #1 hit."
--Dirty Midwest

"CCR: "The Midnight Special" is a better "a man in prison laments his misfortune" song than anything the Allman Brothers did- and that's their home turf."
--The Vaccinator

"This last matchup sucks. Can't we have a lucky loser advance or something? John Fogarty is one of my favorites. But Duane Allman was on a whole other level. I vote with the glass Coricidin bottle and for the Allman Brothers."
--Youngstown's Finest

"#15. The Allman Brothers Band. I've seriously considered having daughters and naming them Melissa and Jessica, and here I'm not even all that much a Southerner!"
--The Bruce

"# 2 Creedence Clearwater Revival
I'm thinking "Lookin' Out My Back Door" would be a good song for karaoke (sp?). Dispite the drug trip thing, I think it's a fun song."
--The Scientist

"Also difficult, but I'll take the Allman Brothers. "In Memory of Elizabeth Reed" is one of my favorite instrumentals (the alleged story behind it is wonderful). When I was in junior high, I remember my older cousins discussing the ABs with total reverence; I always thought of a taste for their music as being sophisticated. Not too many Southern rock bands could have that kind of effect in northern Connecticut, but then the Allman Brothers were clones of no one. BTW, after Duane Allman's death, his brother's mournful solo remake of "Midnight Rider" hit the top 40 briefly. Wish I had that record; unlike the original, it never seems to get oldies-station airplay."
--The Bug Doctor

---

Today's Matchup from from the New England Regional, at Dunkin Donuts Center in Providence, RI

# 1 Led Zeppelin
vs.
# 8 They Might Be Giants

Led Zeppelin: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Whole Lotta Love
Stairway to Heaven
The Song Remains the Same
Rock and Roll
Ramble On
Kashmir
Heartbreaker/Living Loving Maid
Dazed and Confused
Dancing Days
Communication Breakdown
Over Hills and Far Away
Hey Hey What Can I Do?

They Might Be Giants: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
They'll Need a Crane
Put Your Hand Inside the Puppet Head
Purple Toupee
Everything Right Is Wrong Again
Don't Let's Start
Birdhouse in Your Soul
Ana Ng
(She Was A) Hotel Detective
She's an Angel
It's Not My Birthday
Istanbul, Not Constantinople
Particle Man

---

Today's Matchup from from the New England Regional, at Verizon Wireless Arena in Manchester, NH

# 5 Barenaked Ladies
vs.
# 4 Metallica

Barenaked Ladies: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
It's All Been Done
Jane
Be My Yoko Ono
One Week
If I Had $1000000
Brian Wilson
Call and Answer
Grade 9
If I Fall
What a Good Boy

Metallica: Song Highlights from AMG:
Seek & Destroy
One
Master of Puppets
Jump in the Fire
For Whom the Bell Tolls
Fade to Black
Enter Sandman
Wherever I May Roam
Welcome Home (Sanitarium)
Until It Sleeps
The Unforgiven

---

Today's Matchup from the Pseudo-New England Regional, at the Carrier Dome in Syracuse, NY

# 3 The Eagles
vs.
# 6 Elvis Costello and the Attractions

The Eagles: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Witchy Woman
Tequila Sunrise
One of These Nights
Take It to the Limit
Take It Easy
Already Gone
Peaceful Easy Feeling
Hotel California
Best of My Love
Desperado

Elvis Costello and the Attractions: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Alison
Watching the Detectives
(I Don't Want to Go to) Chelsea
Pump It Up
Radio, Radio
(What's So Funny 'Bout) Peace, Love, and Understanding?
Oliver's Army
Accidents Will Happen
I Can't Stand Up for Falling Down
New Amsterdam
High Fidelity
Everyday I Write the Book
Less Than Zero

---

Today's Matchup from the New England Regional, at The Centrum in Worcester, MA

# 7 The Jimi Hendrix Experience
vs.
# 2 Pearl Jam

The Jimi Hendrix Experience: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Voodoo Child (Slight Return)
Purple Haze
Manic Depression
Little Wing
Hey Joe
Foxey Lady
Fire
All Along the Watchtower
Wind Cries Mary
Wait Until Tomorrow
The Star-Spangled Banner (live)

Pearl Jam: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Jeremy
Even Flow
Black
Daughter
Betterman
Alive
Yellow Ledbetter
Spin the Black Circle
I Got ID
Given to Fly
Wishlist

That's all for today, until tomorrow,
I'm Craig Barker, not being kidnapped by the French.

Thought for the Day: 23/24ths
May 13, 2003

First things first:
Way too much to do, so many little things...

---

The Barker 128-Band Tournament of Champions--Day 16

Vote by logging into the comments widget or emailing me by 7:00 pm EDT WEDNESDAY. We'll tally and post the results then.

End of Round 1, so you know what that means:
What's our next tournament?

Well, again, I am open to suggestions...The logical choice would be best solo artist, but this does beg a problem, what about the people that we slipped into the tournament that should be considered more as solo artists? Well, my thought was anyone under a six seed could be eligible again, but I am willing to listen to your thoughts.

If you have another idea, I am all ears too. I had a suggestion of all love songs, but that would just be a seriously screwed up tournament, as would all breakup songs. Best American artists, best non-American artists, best album, you know, make a suggestion. I'll make a call sometime next week and start on nominating procedures, though I will tell you that they will be strikingly similar to what we did this time.

OK, that is all. Thank you, and let's be careful out there.
--The Commissioner

---

Yesterday's Results from the Mountain Regional, at McKale Center in Tuscon, AZ
# 1 The Beach Boys--30 votes
#16 Smokey Robinson and the Miracles--08 votes
Abstentions: 0
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"I vote for Smokey 'cause the Beach Boys are all about having the nicest car and dating the prettiest girl. And that's just not rock 'n roll, people."
--Mrs. Gerbil #1

"Beach Boys, for Pet Sounds. I have to complain as well about seeding the greatest of the Motown bands 16th."
--Dirty Midwest

"Smokey. I'm calling Harvard over Stanford here. Yes, Brian Wilson is important as a composer. I daresay Smokey Robinson is just as important. Remember that three-fourths of the Beach Boys' catalog is Chuck Berry bleached a paler shade of white."
--The Answer Guy

"The Miracles. If it weren't for Brian Wilson, the Beach Boys would be spoken of in the same breath as the Surfaris or Herman Ze German. With him, they produced mostly mediocre, mostly forgettable, mostly bubblegum pop. Despite Michael Moore's excellent ironic use of the Beach Boys in Roger & Me, wouldn't it be nice if the Miracles actually got a miracle?"
--The Vaccinator

---

# 9 Bob Seger and the Silver Bullet Band--19 votes
# 8 Wilco--15 votes
Abstentions: 4
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"Sorry to everyone who wants me to vote Wilco here... Sad, but true, in summer camp we had a divisional sing every year in which each division would perform a song and a camp-related filk. Anyway, back to 1997... my cousin's best friend was a counselor in my division and came up with our adaptation of Night Moves... We really got hooked on it. We lost that sing; we felt robbed. That was one of my last memories of him; he died on the way home two weeks later, in a one-car accident on the Taconic Parkway. So I vote Seger, because he would have wanted me to vote that way if he knew that I was doing this. I'm going to have a good cry now."
--J-Kel

"#9. The Silver Bullet Band. At first I thought Wilco had serious longevity problems, then I realized I simply hadn't heard of them until years after their career began. Even so... I think they're a niche band, just as AC/DC is a niche band, except that Wilco's nichedom will help it at the same time AC/DC's nichedom hurts it."
--The Bruce

"Who the *&^@ are these people? Yes, I'm a musical moron, but then again, my brain's stuffed
full of other crap. Let's see... I've never heard a Wilco song to recognize it. I absolutely
LOATHE those stupid Ford truck commercials that use "Like a Rock" as the jingle. I also don't
much like "Night Moves". Wilco wins in the penalty shoot-out of a 0-0 tie: in other words, in a
totally crap, looser-like fashion. "
--The Ex-Pat

"Don Quixote, meet windmill... Okay, so first off, Wilco was formed from the ruins of Uncle Tupelo, the band that started the new depression movement. Then they made one of the better breakup albums since Fleetwood Mac's Rumours (A.M.), broke off from alt-country to make an album that's been compared to Exile on Main Street (Being There), took time out to help Billy Bragg reintroduce Woody Guthrie to a new generation of fans (the Mermaid Avenue albums), said hello to Brian Wilson-style orchestration and Bob Dylan-style lyrics (Summerteeth), then mined noise-rock and avant garde percussion to find the perfect sound to express the particular gray nostalgia of the Midwest (Yankee Hotel Foxtrot). Have I mentioned they're great live? And that Jeff Tweedy's
wife ran the best club in Chicago until it got shut down? And... the Commish pops Ms. Williams in the neck with a sedative-laden blow dart"
--The Raging Lemur

"Wilco - Yea alt-country!
Furthermore, since I'm from a Ford family, I can't vote for "Mr. Like a Rock"."
--The Virginian

---

Yesterday's Results from the Mid-South Regional, at Carolina Center in Columbia, SC
# 5 Cream--17 votes
#12 Cheap Trick--19 votes
Abstentions: 1
Oncoming Traffic: 1

Match Comments (Best only):
"Cheap Trick (also, I'd like to vote for Dwight Yoakam's as the best version of "I Want You To Want Me")"
--The Mathematical Bulldogg

"Cheap Trick (I don't know much from either of these bands, so I'll give my vote to the underdog)."
--Quaker JY

"Cheap Trick they're that band that you love, but you didn't realize that they sang half of those songs."
--The Curator

"Much like Homer, I prefer to listen to Cheap Trick. I maintain that Verizon would have had a much more successful commercial if they had just played "I Want You To Want Me" over a black screen with the Verizon logo rather than some creepy stalkerish plot."
--The Pentagon Player

"Cheap Trick, easy. Clapton is a false idol! He is the golden calf of rock and/or roll!"
--Studio 176

"Since Derek and the Dominoes didn't make it, I'll give the nod to Cream "
--Pitt Bill

"Gotta go with Cream here -- "Tales of Brave Ulysses" was used to much better effect in a Buffy episode than was Cheap Trick's version of the That 70's Show theme. And the studio version of IWYTWM is horrible. Just horrible. thank God for Budokan."
--Gerbil #1

" Cheap Trick. The first album (OK, cassette) I ever owned was either "Lap of Luxury" or The Fat Boys' "Comin' Back Hard Again". I can't remember which of the two was first, but I can tell you which one I still own. "Don't Be Cruel" remains my favorite Elvis cover (though the Dead Kennedys' "Viva Las Vegas" from Fear and Loathing is close)."
--Stepson of Troy

---

#13 Depeche Mode--16 votes
# 4 AC/DC--20 votes
Abstentions: 2
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"Oohh, this one's hard. Depeche Mode is gloomy while AC/DC is just plain fun. However, I've listened to "Music For The Masses" so many times in the car between Kalamazoo and Ann Arbor that I think it deserves credit for all the volunteering I do at UM tournaments. I'll vote for Depeche Mode with an apology to Angus and the boys, whom I really do like as well."
--The Bug Doctor

"Depeche Mode. I like AC/DC, but for some reason I like Depeche Mode better, can't figure out why."
--JQSmooth

"AC/DC -- The very first album I ever bought was "Back in Black". I was in the 6th grade and didn't quite appreciate the song titles until the 7th or 8th grade. What can I say, I am a little slow. But, this was a band that rebounded from the loss of a lead singer to reach their pinnacle of success, both creative and commercial. "Long Live Rock!""
--Law and Gerbil: SDV

"Depeche Mode. I might have to turn in my Heavy Metal Fan Club card for this one. AC/DC wrote a song back in the mid-1970's. It was a hit. They kept writing it for over 25 years. Enough already!"
--RickT

"AC/DC, even though Angus lately has been in serious need of some Ricola."
--3M

"AC/DC though I did gain a bit more respect for Depeche Mode when I saw Jonny Cash covered Personal Jesus. On the other hand I also liked his version as opposed to the original."
--JoeF

"This match-up a bit tricky, but I will defer to my 'more-good-memories-associated-with-this-band' voting technique and go AC/DC (we're talking keggers in the middle of a corn field good memories)."
--Eliz

---

Today's Matchups from the Golden State Regional, at Pauley Pavilion in Los Angeles, CA

# 3 The Kinks
vs.
#14 Def Leppard

The Kinks: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB and RT:
You Really Got Me
Well Respected Man
Waterloo Sunset
Victoria
Tired of Waiting for You
Sunny Afternoon
Lola
Days
David Watts
Come Dancing

Def Leppard: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Rocket
Rock of Ages
Pour Some Sugar on Me
Photograph
Love Bites
Hysteria
Foolin'
Bringin' on the Heartbreak
Animal
Let It Go

#11 The Byrds
vs.
# 6 Crosby, Stills, Nash (and Young)

The Byrds: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Turn! Turn! Turn! (To Everything There Is a Season)
So You Want to Be a Rock & Roll Star
Mr. Tambourine Man
It Won't Be Wrong
I'll Feel a Whole Lot Better
Hickory Wind
Goin' Back
All I Really Want to Do
Eight Miles High
5D (Fifth Dimension)

Crosby, Stills, Nash (and Young): Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Almost Cut My Hair
Wasted on the Way
Southern Cross
Guinnevere
Marrakesh Express
Helpless
Suite: Judy Blue Eyes
Teach Your Children
Ohio
Our House

---

Today's Matchups from the Golden State Regional, at Haas Pavilion in Berkeley, CA

# 7 Diana Ross and the Supremes
vs.
#10 Lynyrd Skynyrd

Diana Ross and the Supremes: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Where Did Our Love Go
Baby Love
Come See About Me
Stop! In the Name of Love
Back in My Arms Again
I Hear a Symphony
You Can't Hurry Love
You Keep Me Hangin' On
Reflections
Love Child
Someday We'll Be Together

Lynyrd Skynyrd: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
What's Your Name?
Tuesday's Gone
That Smell
Sweet Home Alabama
Saturday Night Special
Gimme Three Steps
Free Bird
Whiskey Rock-A-Roller
You Got That Right
Simple Man

#15 The Allman Brothers Band
vs.
# 2 Creedence Clearwater Revival

The Allman Brothers Band: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Whipping Post
Ramblin' Man
Midnight Rider
Melissa
Jessica
In Memory of Elizabeth Reed
Blue Sky
Trouble No More
Southbound
One Way Out

Creedence Clearwater Revival: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB
Who'll Stop the Rain?
Proud Mary
Lookin' Out My Back Door
Lodi
Green River
Fortunate Son
Down on the Corner
Born on the Bayou
Travelin' Band
Bad Moon Rising

That's all for today, until tomorrow,
I'm Craig Barker, apparently one who has seen rain, thank you for asking John.

Thought for the Day: Bright Light City
May 12, 2003

First things first:
Travels with Barker 2003: Las Vegas I
Like coins into a slot machine, this is my stream of consciousness review of Las Vegas:

Walked the Strip, got a whole new appreciation for the sheer excess of Vegas, and well, that's not a bad thing.
Walking in Vegas seems to me like it would be more fun as exercise because there are lots of things to look at.
"Walking in Memphis" was a hit for Marc Cohn.
Mark Coen is the Wizard of Babson Park.
There are lots of places to park in Vegas, but they are all tastefully behind the hotels.
The hotels are massive in their size and scope, the Bellagio alone is just oy.
The Bellagio was the site of the wedding I was attending.
Congratulations to Uncle Joe and Aunt Alison, my best wishes for everything you want in life.
Among the things I want in life is a Lions' Super Bowl Victory.
To that end, at 60/1 odds, I now have $10 on the Lions.
I would have bet on the Tigers, they were getting 1000/1, but you don't want to waste money.
In that same vein, I did eat at ESPNZone Vegas.
I convinced them to put on the Tigers/Devil Rays game, it was insane.
Speaking of Detroit teams, Pistons won as I landed, but didn't get their act together for the weekend.
The Pistons were winning that game at just about the same time that Sarah was getting blown up by Liam and the DNA Lab on CSI.
I did pull the Grissom thing off, Manhattan Express at New York, New York.
Sadly, I did not get to investigate any DB's.
I did however get to visit Star Trek: The Experience.
I'll now allow ample time for mocking me....And that's just about 5 minutes...
It took me about five minutes but I did call into work on Friday to see how the 34 did on the AP Test.
Following standard Barker theory, adopted from the book of Dre, nobody died, so it was a good day.
Yesterday was also a good day, but that was largely because I was reading April 1865, which is an amazing premise and a well written book.
At this point I could write a recursive loop back up to the sports book, but I won't, it would be too Wild.
I really would like to see Minnesota win this series, even if hockey won't be over until June.
Looking forward to July, even if it will be a lot hotter when I go back.

And that my friends, is Vegas in a nutshell.

---

The Barker 128-Band Tournament of Champions--Day 15

Vote by logging into the comments widget or emailing me by 10:00 pm EDT TUESDAY. We'll tally and post the results then.

We're back, back again...nah, that's another tournament.

OK, that is all. Thank you, and let's be careful out there.
--The Commissioner

---

Yesterday's Results from the Mountain Regional, at Marriott Center in Provo, UT
# 3 Van Halen--34 votes
#14 The Bangles--12 votes
Abstentions: 0
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
Just the e-mail comments today, read the widget for the rest...

"Van Halen: As much bitching as I have read regarding Van Halen, their first three albums are still better than anything the Bangles could put together...and it's only at that point that we get to the real commercial successes."
--Law and Gerbil: SDV

---

#11 Jimmy Buffett and the Coral Reefer Band--12 votes
# 6 Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers--31 votes
Abstentions: 3
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
Just the e-mail comments today, read the widget for the rest...

"Buffett (Parrotheads Unite!!!)"
--The Crocheting Terrapin

---

Yesterday's Results from the Mountain Regional, at Thomas and Mack Center in Las Vegas, NV
# 7 Bon Jovi--21 votes
#10 The Pretenders--23 votes
Abstentions: 1
Oncoming Traffic: 1

Match Comments (Best only):
Just the e-mail comments today, read the widget for the rest...

"Y'know, Bon Jovi is just Bon Jovi, but Chrissie is a goddess. Hell, she's Precious. Pretenders rule!"
--The Bug Doctor

"The Pretenders. Jon Bon Jovi went to my high school and all, but I'm not sure they were aware Triumph was mocking them when he appeared on stage with them."
--JQSmooth

"The Pretenders: Just because "My City Was Gone" is the opening theme music for Rush Limbaugh."
--The Mentor

"Another tough matchup, but I'm going to have to go with one of the best - and most underrated by rock snobs - bands ever. Bon Jovi has made quality music that everyone loves since the mid-80s, and they're still going today. Not only are they still going, they haven't changed their sound - obviously, they are doing something right if after 15-20 years the same sound resonants with the fan base. Not to mention Bon Jovi at Giants stadium was the best concert I've ever been to - and I'm going back in August for round 2. Bon Jovi all the way."
--The Curator

"I really don't need to justify this vote. Bon Jovi is simply the greatest band in the history of music. If I wasn't at work right now and could access it, I would log onto the comments widget and post a great tribute to Bon Jovi in an attempt to lobby others to my cause. Hopefully, this quote will surface tonight in e-mail. If it does, my people, I implore you, remember Bon Jovi. If this was karaoke and someone started singing "Living on a Prayer," you would sing along. If you were at a bar and "You Give Love A Bad Name" was played, you would cheer. When Jon got killed in U-571, you were probably pissed. Again, I implore you, remember this in future rounds."
--Marist MU

"The Pretenders -- This group has done two things better than ANYTHING Bon Jovi has done: the video for "Don’t Get Me Wrong" which spoofs The Prisoner and "Human," a great song used for the late and much lamented Cupid, a show that proved that Jeremy Piven can do at least one thing without John Cusack, that Paula Marshall is the new generation’s Alison LaPlaca, and that Jamie Tarses should never have been given an entire network to run.

Odd how almost my entire vote is about things seen on TV rather than the music. Speaking of music, did I mention that Bon Jovi’s sucks? It’s like the gateway drug to hair metal."
--The Wizard of Babson Park

"Ms. Hynde is my fave female in rock, except maybe Joni Mitchell. Oh, Brass in Pocket..."
--The Raging Lemur

---

#15 Iggy and the Stooges--06 votes
# 2 The Ramones--38 votes
Abstentions: 2
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
Just the e-mail comments today, read the widget for the rest...

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Today's Matchups from the Golden State Regional, at Maples Pavilion in Palo Alto, CA

# 1 The Beach Boys
vs.
#16 Smokey Robinson and the Miracles

The Beach Boys: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Surf's Up
Surfin' U.S.A.
Surfer Girl
I Get Around
Help Me, Rhonda
Good Vibrations
God Only Knows
Don't Worry Baby
Wouldn't It Be Nice?
California Girls
Sloop John B

Smokey Robinson and the Miracles: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Going to a Go-Go
I Second That Emotion
Shop Around
Way Over There
Bad Girl
Who's Lovin' You
I'll Try Something New
You've Really Got a Hold on Me
Choosey Beggar
My Girl Has Gone
The Tears of a Clown
Baby, Baby Don't Cry
The Tracks of My Tears
The Love I Saw in You Was Just a Mirage
(Come 'Round Here) I'm the One You Need

# 9 Bob Seger and the Silver Bullet Band
vs.
# 8 Wilco

Bob Seger and the Silver Bullet Band: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Roll Me Away
Night Moves
Turn the Page
You'll Accomp'ny Me
Hollywood Nights
Still the Same
Old Time Rock & Roll
We've Got Tonight
Against the Wind
Mainstreet
The Fire Inside
Like a Rock
Rock and Roll Never Forgets
Katmandu
Shame on the Moon

Wilco: Song Highlights from AMG, VG, and JLW (I wouldn't even know what to start):
Nothing'severgonnastandinmyway (Again)
I'm Always in Love
I Got You (At the End of the Century)
I Must Be High
Monday
When You Wake up Feeling Old
Shot in the Arm
Can't Stand It
Outta Mind (Outta Sight)
Box Full of Letters from A.M.
I Am Trying to Break Your Heart
Kamera
I'm the Man Who Loves You
California Stars

---

Today's Matchups from the Golden State Regional, at HP Pavilion in San Jose in San Jose, CA

# 5 Cream
vs.
#12 Cheap Trick

Cream: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Tales of Brave Ulysses
Sunshine of Your Love
Strange Brew
I Feel Free
White Room
Spoonful
Crossroads
Badge
World of Pain
We're Going Wrong

Cheap Trick: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
I Want You to Want Me
He's a Whore
Oh Caroline
Southern Girls
Surrender
Oh, Candy
Dream Police
California Man
Goodnight
Tonight It's You

#13 Depeche Mode
vs.
# 4 AC/DC

Depeche Mode: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB and GS and GZ:
Personal Jesus
People Are People
Master and Servant
Just Can't Get Enough
Everything Counts
Enjoy the Silence
Dream On
Question of Lust
The World in My Eyes
Stripped

AC/DC: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
T.N.T.
You Shook Me All Night Long
Whole Lotta Rosie
Highway to Hell
Hells Bells
Girls Got Rhythm
Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap
Back in Black
Moneytalks
If You Want Blood (You've Got It)

That's all for today, until tomorrow,
I'm Craig Barker, stuck in a corner.

Thought for the Day: Home of America's favorite Crime Scene Investigators.
May 8, 2003

First things first:
We're off to Vegas. Everyone is excited, my enthusiasm is tempered. I know this stems from the helplessness you feel when you leave your charges to do what they have been trained for all year. I am sure I will be excited once I get there, and I will have some form of report when I return. But clearly I am the Grissom of this trip.

---

The Barker 128-Band Tournament of Champions--Day 14
Vote by logging into the comments widget or emailing me by 7:00 pm EDT MONDAY.

We'll tally and post the results then.

Real quick, there will be no voting on Friday since I will be off to the brightest spot in the solar system that isn't the sun. I'll be back Sunday and we'll pick up Monday, so extended voting on Thursday-->Monday.

OK, that is all. Thank you, and let's be careful out there.
--The Commissioner

---

Yesterday's Results from the Mountain Regional, at McKale Center in Tuscon, AZ
# 1 The Beatles--33 votes
#16 Alabama--04 votes
Abstentions: 0
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
Read the widget...

---

# 9 The Grateful Dead--15 votes
# 8 The Jackson Five--21 votes
Abstentions: 1
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
Read the widget...

---

Yesterday's Results from the Mid-South Regional, at Carolina Center in Columbia, SC
# 5 Bruce Springsteen and The E Street Band--27 votes
#12 Los Lobos--10 votes
Abstentions: 0
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
Read the widget...

---

#13 Sleater-Kinney--09 votes
# 4 Bob Marley and the Wailers--26 votes
Abstentions: 2
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
Read the widget...

---

Today's Matchups from the Mountain Regional, at Marriott Center in Provo, UT
# 3 Van Halen
vs.
#14 The Bangles

Van Halen: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB and RT:
You Really Got Me/Eruption
Why Can't This Be Love?
Runnin' With the Devil
Panama
Jump
Jamie's Cryin'
Hot for Teacher
Dance the Night Away
Everybody Wants Some
Romeo Delight
The Full Bug
I'll Wait
Dreams
Right Now
Top of the World
Can't Stop Loving You
Humans Being
Without You

The Bangles: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Hazy Shade of Winter
Eternal Flame
If She Knew What She Wants
Going Down to Liverpool
A Hero Takes a Fall
Manic Monday
Walk Like an Egyptian
Be With You
I'll Set You Free
Dover Beach

#11 Jimmy Buffett and the Coral Reefer Band
vs.
# 6 Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers
Jimmy Buffett and the Coral Reefer Band: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Cheeseburger in Paradise
He Went to Paris
Fins
Son of a Son of a Sailor
A Pirate Looks at Forty
Margaritaville
Come Monday
Changes in Latitudes, Changes in Attitudes
Why Don't We Get Drunk...
Pencil Thin Mustache
Grapefruit-Juicy Fruit
Boat Drinks
Volcano
Mexico

Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
An American Girl
Breakdown
Listen to Her Heart
I Need to Know
Refugee
Don't Do Me Like That
Even the Losers
Here Comes My Girl
The Waiting
You Got Lucky
Don't Come Around Here No More
I Won't Back Down
Runnin' Down a Dream
Free Fallin'
Learning to Fly
Into the Great Wide Open
Mary Jane's Last Dance

---

Today's Matchups from the Mountain Regional, at Thomas and Mack Center in Las Vegas, NV
# 7 Bon Jovi
vs.
#10 The Pretenders

Bon Jovi: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
You Give Love a Bad Name
Wanted: Dead or Alive
Livin' on a Prayer
I'll Be There for You
Bad Medicine
Living in Sin
Lay Your Hands on Me
It's My Life
Bed of Roses
Blaze of Glory
It's My Life
Thank You For Loving Me
Everyday

The Pretenders: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Stop Your Sobbing
Kid
Brass in Pocket
Talk of the Town
I Go to Sleep
Day After Day
Message of Love
Back on the Chain Gang
Middle of the Road
2000 Miles
Show Me
A Thin Line Between Love and Hate
Don't Get Me Wrong
Hymn to Her
I'll Stand By You
My City Was Gone

#15 Iggy and the Stooges
vs.
# 2 The Ramones

Iggy and the Stooges: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
T.V. Eye
Search and Destroy
Raw Power
No Fun
Loose
I Wanna Be Your Dog
Gimme Danger
Your Pretty Face Is Going to Hell
L.A. Blues
Heavy Liquid

The Ramones: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB and GS
Now I Wanna Sniff Some Glue
I Wanna Be Your Boyfriend
I Just Want To Have Something to Do
I Wanna Be Sedated
I Don't Wanna Go Down to the Basement
I Don't Wanna Walk Around With You
Now I Wanna Be a Good Boy
Do You Wanna Dance?
I Wanna Be Well
I Wanna Live
Sheena Is A Punk Rocker
Judy is a Punk
Suzy is a Headbanger
Rockaway Beach
Blitzkrieg Bop

That's all for today, until Monday,
I'm Craig Barker, looking at the evidence.

Thought for the Day: Face Time
May 7, 2003

First things first:
Ryan said on TV that Kidd's wife should be smacked
Here's the issue I have with this. Is what Bob Ryan said idiotic and insensitive, even if said in jest? Yes! But am I alone in thinking that there is something wrong that Ryan got more of a punishment for saying what he'd like to do to Mrs. Kidd than Jason Kidd did for pleading out on what he allegedly did to his wife?

Billups will likely be a game-time decision
Here's to the greatest basketball player in the history of the state of Colorado.

Bennett's Gambling Shows Religions' Split
I just highlight this because I thought it was an interesting article. This article, is funnier.

More crappy nicknames for NBA teams
I want the Flight, because I think it sucks hardest. If they pick it, they are just paving the way for a certain "Air"man to join the flight crew.

---

The Barker 128-Band Tournament of Champions--Day 13
Vote by logging into the comments widget or emailing me by 5:00 pm EDT THURSDAY. We'll tally and post the results then.

Real quick, there will be no voting on Friday since I will be off to the brightest spot in the solar system that isn't the sun. I'll be back Sunday and we'll pick up Monday, so extended voting on Thursday-->Monday. Also, please note that if you vote by email tomorrow, it is unlikely your comments will get posted (same with the widget, but at least there everyone can see them.)

OK, that is all. Thank you, and let's be careful out there.
--The Commissioner

---

Yesterday's Results from the Mid-South Regional, at Thompson-Bolling Arena in Knoxville, TN
# 3 Guns n' Roses--23 votes
#14 Three Dog Night--22 votes
Abstentions: 4
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"Three Dog Night:

Dan: Eli's coming.
Casey: Eli?
Dan: From the Three Dog Night song.
Casey: Yes.
Dan: Eli's something bad. A darkness.
Casey: "Eli's coming, hide your heart, girl." Eli's an inveterate womanizer. I think you're getting the song wrong.
Dan: I know I'm getting the song wrong, but when I first heard it, that's what I always thought it meant, and things stick with you that way.
(Over/under on voters mentioning this episode of Sports Night in their vote is set at 6)"
--The Wizard of Babson Park

"Three Dog Night - If only for Eli's Coming and its contribution to SportsNight"
--The Virginian

"3 Dog Night: Sports Night featured Eli's Coming prominently, plus my whack-job roommate sophomore year told me that I simply had to agree that GNR was the greatest band ever. Oh yeah? Well eat this, Shabbazz."
--Jersey Gerbil

"Three Dog Night. Yes, Guns'n'Roses had huge hits. And I hate them all! Three Dog Night loses points in my book because other people (Laura Nyro, Harry Nillson, etc.) wrote their decent stuff, but they get a few of those points back for good choices of material."
--Studio 176

"Three Dog Night: So, I load the page, see the first matchup, and say, "Three Dog Night did 'Never Been To Spain?'" Then, I load the comments widget, and the first thing I see is Philpy's description of Three Dog Night as "one of those bands that makes you say 'They did that?'" The man seems to knows his stuff, so I'll go with the expert here. GnR produced a little too much dreck along with the pearls, anyway."
--The Vaccinator

"Guns and Roses. The Derrick Coleman of Rock Music. They made a three seed on what they put out and all I can think of is what they might have done if they had their shit together."
--RickT

"GNR are not the Derrek Coleman of rock music, they're the Bo Jackson. They actually achieved greatness, before suddenly dropping off of the face of the earth. (Bo left through no fault of his own, but the career arcs are similar.) Plus, the inability to completely get their shit together is what made them so fascinating. If they stayed off the booze, showed up on time for concerts and perfected their pop sensiblities, right now they'd be Aerosmith. Instead, they made the best use ever of the "shooting star" cliche (brief, but brilliant success followed by equally brief, but brilliant flame out) and Axl didn't even have to drown in his own vomit to do it. Only three-and-a-half albums and they're still going to Hall of Fame."
--SpartanSteve

"Three Dog Night. G'nR didn't have a cool Far Side comic strip based on any of their songs. Larson's bullfrogs look exactly as I picture Jeremiah to this day."
--JoeF

"This one is a tough--but its Three Dog Night, more happy times associated with their Music."
--Eliz

---

#11 Earth, Wind, and Fire--10 votes
# 6 The Four Tops--37 votes
Abstentions: 0
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
" Tops over EWF, but agonized over that one. The only thing that put Tops over was that I would imagine more artists following them would cite them as a direct influence... of course that's "Just My Imagination..." (Yep, I'm invoking the Temptations here..)"
--Penguin in the City

"Four Tops. Can you really tell the Tops apart from the Temptations?"
--JQSmooth
(Commissioner's Note: Yes, but I'm from Detroit.)

"EWF. I can think of a lot more goofy 80's pop culture appearances from Tops (Sun Country Wine Coolers? "Little Shop of Horrors?"), while the only EWF impact I can remember was Philip Bailey helping Phil Collins out on "Easy Lover." Still, I forgive him, and I think I'd rather listen to a slew of EWF than a slew of Four Tops."
--VwlssWndr

---

Yesterday's Results from the Mid-South Regional, at McKenzie Arena in Chattanooga, TN

# 7 Red Hot Chili Peppers--19 votes
#10 Bill Halley and the Comets--28 votes
Abstentions: 2
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"#10 Bill Halley and the Comets
"She said I'm sorry pretty daddy/You know my love is just for you/She said I'm sorry pretty daddy/You know my love is just for you/Won't you say that you'll forgive me/And say your love for me is true. . . ." Now I'm gonna be singing Bill Halley songs all day."
--Mrs. Gerbil #1

"Two entirely different genres of music here. The Chili Peppers have the whole "on heroine, off heroine" storyline going, while I can't think of any controversy for Bill or his Comets other than their notorious habit of only giving interviews once every 76 years. But, the Chili Peppers make better music, so they get the vote."
--Marist MU

"Bill Haley goes down on his way to Fargo, and its the day the music died. That's gotta count for something."
--Jersey Gerbil
(Gerbil #1's Note: Chris, I think you're thinking of Buddy Holly. Sheesh. No wonder you sit quietly during the music questions.")

"RHCP. While "Rock Around the Clock" was pivotal, the Peppers had much more staying power. Punk, funk, and one of the best ballads of the alternative revolution to boot; more than enough to forgive their shortcomings. Bill Haley just doesn't have the bench to stay in this one."
--The Answer Guy

"Bill Haley, because in every picture I've ever seen of the group, they're wearing these ugly-ass plaid suit jackets."
--3M

"Four Tops. One of a handful of Motown bands to leave the label and still top the charts, they didn't have the greatest voices or the best moves or the principal focus from Motown, but they made everything work for over a decade at the top of the charts. And they kept their original lineup together for nearly 45 years!!! For anyone not in the Blind Boys of Alabama or related by blood or marraige, that is unfathomable."
--Cornell KMP

---

#15 Oasis--19 votes
# 2 Talking Heads--30 votes
Abstentions: 0
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"Any band that can inspire a worried query during Prime Minister's questions earns my vote."
--You Know Who

"Anybody planning to vote against arrogance and pomposity here better stop and think, whoa, David Byrne actually beats the Gallagher brothers on that one. I prefer drunk soccer punks to art school punks anyday."
--Cardinal

"It's a terrible reason, but "Psycho Killer" was pretty much the theme of one of the lectures in my Digital Libraries class (we were discussing the Dublin Core metadata standard). That pushes Talking Heads over the top in this matchup."
--Senor J

"Oasis (OK, the Hampton of this tournament, or something)."
--The Mathematical Bulldogg
(Commissioner's Note: Sadly, David Byrne did not go Eustachy on us.)

"Per emails to friends after a trip to Europe - 'The first time I see ["Let Love Be Your Energy"], I immediately remember Robbie Williams being described by some member of Oasis as the "fat singer from Take That".

What's that? You don't remember Oasis? Don't feel bad - I just remember that a band member from Oasis made the quote. I did some internet research on the band when I got back, and I found out that they were considered to be the next Beatles just a few years ago.

Still doesn't ring a bell? Oh, well.'

I'll take Talking Heads every day of the week and twice on Sunday, Lieutenant Barker."
--The Pentagon Player

"Talking Heads, because I floored The Good Doctor during the playoffs when Eddie George was on the sidelines in an enormous warmup jacket after being knocked out of the game, and I came up with "You may ask yourself, why am I standing on the sidelines in an enormous warmup jacket. You may ask yourself, how did I get this warmup jacket. Etc.""
--The Stepson of Troy

"Talking Heads. Champagne Supernova simply makes me want to smash in my head with the claw end of a hammer."
--PittBill

---

Today's Matchups from the Mountain Regional, at McKale Center in Tuscon, AZ

# 1 The Beatles
vs.
#16 Alabama

The Beatles: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB (yeah, this was easy):
Something
Penny Lane
Yesterday
Strawberry Fields Forever
Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds
In My Life
I Want to Hold Your Hand
Hey Jude
Help!
A Hard Day's Night
Come Together
She Loves You
We Can Work It Out
All You Need Is Love

Alabama: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Tennessee River
Mountain Music
The Closer You Get
Roll On (Eighteen Wheeler)
If You're Gonna Play In Texas (You Gotta Have a Fiddle In the Band)
Forty Hour Week (For A Livin')
Can't Keep A Good Man Down
She And I
Song of the South
I'm in a Hurry (And Don't Know Why)
T.L.C. A.S.A.P.
The Cheap Seats
She Ain't Your Ordinary Girl
When It All Goes South


# 9 The Grateful Dead
vs.
# 8 The Jackson Five

The Grateful Dead: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Brokedown Palace
Box of Rain
Touch of Grey
Friend of the Devil
Uncle John's Band
Dark Star
Casey Jones
Truckin'
Sugar Magnolia
Wharf Rat

The Jackson Five: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
I'll Be There
The Love You Save
Enjoy Yourself
Shake Your Body (Down to the Ground)
I Want You Back
ABC
Dancing Machine
Goin' Back to Indiana
Who's Lovin' You
Never Can Say Goodbye

---

Today's Matchups from the Mountain Regional, at Wells Fargo Arena in Tempe, AZ

# 5 Bruce Springsteen and The E Street Band
vs.
#12 Los Lobos

Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Rosalita (Come Out Tonight)
Thunder Road
Tenth Avenue Freeze-Out
It's Hard to Be a Saint in the City
Dancing in the Dark
Born to Run
My Hometown
Hungry Heart
Glory Days
Born in the U.S.A.
The Rising

Los Lobos: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
One Time One Night
I Got Loaded
Will the Wolf Survive?
Don't Worry Baby
Matter of Time
Angels With Dirty Faces
Kiko and the Lavender Moon
La Bamba
Set Me Free (Rosa Lee)
When the Circus Comes

#13 Sleater-Kinney
vs.
# 4 Bob Marley and the Wailers

Sleater-Kinney: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB and GS and GZ:
Anonymous
You're No Rock N' Roll Fun
Words and Guitar
I Wanna Be Your Joey Ramone
Dig Me Out
All Hands on the Bad One
I'm Not Waiting
Living in Exile
Professional
Milkshake N' Honey
Oh!
O2
Get Up
Start Together
The End Of You
Burn Don't Freeze
Faraway
Light Rail Coyote
Step Aside
Ironclad
Call the Doctor

Bob Marley and the Wailers: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
One Love
I Shot the Sheriff
Could You Be Loved?
Is This Love
Exodus
Stir It Up
Redemption Song
Get Up, Stand Up
No Woman, No Cry
Trench Town Rock
Three Little Birds

That's all for today, until tomorrow,
I'm Craig Barker, taking flight.

Thought for the Day: Getting close to Zero Hour
May 6, 2003

First things first:
It's getting close, we're coming down to zero hour for the AP U.S. History Test, and I have the utmost faith in my kids. Whether that is blind or justified will be played out soon enough.

So, here's my latest crazy plan for the Big Ten.

Let's say that the ACC successfully lures the trio of Miami, BC, and the 'Cuse into their realm (and by the way, that Chestnut Hill to Tallahassee roadtrip would be a killer, methinks.) That leaves five football schools in the Big Least: Virginia Tech, Pittsburgh, Rutgers, Connecticut and West Virginia.

Now, we all know the Notre Dame joins the Big Ten fantasy is an illusion, it's never going to happen. But look at the list of five and, all of the sudden, one school makes perfect sense...Pittsburgh.

You're not adding anything further east or west, you're giving Penn State a natural in-state rival (something that many of the Big Ten schools have, JoePa's desires be damned, we have to think long-term here) and you're rounding out the Big Ten into 12 teams, which means Big Ten title game at Ford Field, or the RCA Dome, or Metrodome, or Heinz Field, or Cleveland Browns Stadium, or Paul Brown, or Soldier Field, you have options (though I doubt that the latter four would get it because of the notion of December in the Midwest and a title game...although let's face it, that's good old-fashioned football right there.)

Pittsburgh also has a pretty sound basketball and academic reputation, so it would fit into the other things the Big Ten would be looking for (as well as making a fine partner in the CIC)

But therein lies one sticky wicket...The Divisions:

The easiest split would be:
East West
Penn State Iowa
Pittsburgh Minnesota
Ohio State Wisconsin
Michigan Northwestern
Michigan St. Illinois
Indiana Purdue

Now, let's just call fraught on this right now. From a football standpoint alone, this is one ugly pug. Even with a consistently solid Wisconsin and Illinois making a recent run to title glory and the plucky Wildcats of `95, this is still a very unbalanced equation.

So, let's try another:

North South
Minnesota Illinois
Wisconsin Indiana
Michigan St. Ohio State
Michigan Purdue
Northwestern Penn State
Iowa Pittsburgh

(Iowa put in the North to keep Penn State and Pittsburgh together.)

Certainly a little more balanced, though I think the OSU/PSU crowd would cry fowl. And I think we would need federal legislation to mandate the necessity of the Michigan/Ohio State game. And that creates another major issue, Michigan and OSU have to play in the last game of the season. And in this divisional split, they could, theoretically, play each other in back to back weeks, and I have a feeling that this could lose some of its luster.

So, Michigan and Ohio State should be in the same division, as should Michigan and Michigan State, so that leads to a problem in football (basketball is less problematic because of the nature of the conference tournament where the standings are much more about seeding and there's an unbalanced schedule already with 11 teams, what's one more here.)

Let's try this split:
Former Latter
Indiana Northwestern
Illinois Ohio State
Iowa Penn State
Michigan Pittsburgh
Michigan St. Purdue
Minnesota Wisconsin

What about logical groupings of three for travel purposes:
I II III IV
Iowa Northwestern Michigan Penn State
Minnesota Illinois Michigan St. Pittsburgh
Wisconsin Purdue Indiana Ohio State

Then you could have a division of evens and odds (like the old Mega-WAC):
Odds Evens
Iowa Northwestern
Minnesota Illinois
Wisconsin Purdue
Michigan Penn State
Michigan St. Pittsburgh
Indiana Ohio State

That may be the most balanced yet:

If by groups of two:

1 2 3 4 5 6
Iowa Wisconsin Illinois Ohio State Penn State Michigan
Minnesota Northwestern Purdue Indiana Pittsburgh Michigan State

Odds Evens
Iowa Wisconsin
Minnesota Northwestern
Illinois Ohio State
Purdue Indiana
Penn State Michigan
Pittsburgh Michigan State

Right now, this could be good for both basketball and football. Michigan/OSU would become the showdown to get them to the title game, which has its drawbacks, but it would guarantee the game. Iowa and Ohio State would have emerged from this design in this season's list (theoretically) and would have played a theoretically great game (which they did not in the season) in the Big Ten title game (problem being it would have killed one of those team's BCS dreams.)

The problem I see with this is the unbalanced schedule becomes a nasty little bugger here because of the need for home and homes. I think there would have to be a way where you could draw up a list where O1 would get home games vs. E1 and E3 and on the road against E2 in year one, then get home games against E2 and E4 and a road game against E3, and continuing in a loop. The problem I see is that you would play teams three years in a row, then not play them for three years, but there has to be a way around that. I also know that you would have to balance the divisional schedule to balance the alternation of road and home.

I don't know, I am pretty sure the Big Ten pays people to do this, and I probably should be doing my homework anyway.

Today's highlights:
From AP US History:
AP Practice Test--MC Section

From World History:
Japan since 1945--Or how the teacher could surpass the student.

From International Relations:
Back in the lab.

---

The Barker 128-Band Tournament of Champions--Day 12

Vote by logging into the comments widget or emailing me by 8:00 pm EDT MONDAY. We'll tally and post the results then.

Real quick, there will be no voting on Friday since I will be off to the brightest spot in the solar system that isn't the sun. I'll be back Sunday and we'll pick up Monday, so extended voting on Thursday-->Monday.

OK, that is all. Thank you, and let's be careful out there.
--The Commissioner

---

Yesterday's Results from the Mid-South Regional, at Stegeman Coliseum in Athens, GA
# 1 The Clash--35 votes
#16 Lyle Lovett and His Large Band--06 votes
Abstentions: 1
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"Pick up the phone, London Calling.(Sorry--that was horrible)."
--Eliz

"You know, everytime I hear "Rock the Casbah" or "Should I stay or Should I go" I make the Mandatory "Yes my friends, they truly are the only band that matters" joke. But a 1 seed? I am morally offended by this. I'm voting for Lyle Lovett and His Large Band out of spite, and officially going on record as supporting the conspiracy theory that a certain band is getting
the tracks greased for an easy run to the finals..."
--Marist MU
(Commissioner's Note: Mark--could it be the speak well of the dead sympathy vote in wake of the Grammys?)

"Lyle -- This is the Harvard women's basketball of this tournament, in my book."
--The Mathematical Bulldogg
(Commissioner's Note: No Nate, Harvard scored more than six points in that game.)

"#16 Lyle Lovett and His Large Band
People are complaining that Lyle doesn't belong on this list? Do multiple Grammys mean NOTHING to you??"
--Mrs. Gerbil #1

---

# 9 Sly and the Family Stone--25 votes
# 8 KC and the Sunshine Band--13 votes
Abstentions: 3
Oncoming Traffic: 1

Match Comments (Best only):
"KC and the Sunshine Band. I saw them in concert at Wrigley Field before 70's Night at Wrigley Field and that's good enough for me to make the tough call."
--The Dartmouth Hoosier
(Commissioner's Note: There was no real difference with 70s Night at Wrigley, the Cubs still sucked.)

"The end of the Shrek karaoke dance party beats out hardcore Simpsons nudity. Sly. "
--The Pentagon Player

---

Yesterday's Results from the Mid-South Regional, at Carolina Center in Columbia, SC
# 5 The Band--20 votes
#12 The Steve Miller Band--15 votes
Abstentions: 5
Oncoming Traffic: 2

Match Comments (Best only):
"The Band. I went to a Steve Miller Band concert once in Saratoga. It was terrible. I couldn't see or hear them from where I was and I had about ten cigarettes dropped on me. This was a coed trip at summer camp. I was really annoyed that the girls didn't decide to be girly and outvote us, opting for Riverdance instead... Give me a boombox and "The Weight" anytime. And extra points to the Band for probably being responsible for a majority of the music questions that I've managed to answer in trash. In fact, I think that all of them have been on "The Weight." Allez knowing the necessary piece of information when no one else in the room does! (But dammit, you all need to write more questions on the Gipsy Kings and Las Ketchup. They're really high-quality, I assure you.)"
--Senor HeyIStillHaveOptionsMrSnootyPants

"Steve Miller Band. The Band is good, but that good? I'm not too sure."
--JQSmooth

"3) The Steve Miller Band - I don't think I know enough The Band music to vote for them. In fact, that reminds me, I keep meaning to buy "The Music from Big Pink". I may go to BMGMusicService.com right now."
--Law and Gerbil: SDV

"The Band – I hate the Steve Miller Band. Hate. I don’t hate much. I hate them. H-A-T-E. It’s a powerful emotion, yes, but better for me to voice my absolute hatred for them rather than pretend I just don’t care for them and have that seething mass of hate grow in the darkness."
--The Wizard of Babson Park

"The Steve Miller Band--the GH is of course the CD that every college student from the last 20 years or so owns."
--The Mentor
(Commissioner's Note: No, I have to think it's Bob Marley's Legend.)

"Ok, KC is fun. But really, Sly is the better band. Everyday People inspires more thought than disco music."
--Dirty Midwest

"The Band. Has anyone ever actually seen Steve Miller alive? Is he even a real person?"
--SpartanSteve

" The Band. OK, so remember the year when Lollapalooza jumped the shark by bringing back older bands including Devo? (1997, '98?) In response a local radio station played fake commercials for the next five years of Lollapalooza lineups, getting more and more comical (Kajagoogoo, Taco...). The penultimate year (2001?) ended with, "and on the second stage, the STEEEEEVE Miller Band"; the last one ended with, "and in the parking lot, the STEEEEEVE Miller Band". That says volumes.

And "The Weight" is my second favorite song whose title is totally opaque to the song's contents. (Creeque Alley beats it by a nose.)"
--Stepson of Troy

"The Band. Solely on the fact that Up on Cripple Creek was covered by Tom Wopat for the Dukes of Hazzard CD."
--PittBill

---

#13 KISS--15 votes
# 4 Fleetwood Mac--23 votes
Abstentions: 4
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"I was at my friendly local record shop waiting to check out recently, and I was looking at their top 50 albums of the week. The new Cat Power topped the list; there were the Uncle Tupelo re-releases, the new Yo La Tengo, etc. And one name just stood out as not making any sense whatsoever: Fleetwood Mac.

I was joking with the cashier about it, and he said, "You know, it's weird. They just have this power. People will come in and buy the most hardcore shit and buy Fleetwood Mac too. I don't understand it."

I don't know if my neighbors are closet Fleetwood Mac fans or if they're just burning Fleetwood Mac CDs on a gigantic pyre. Either way, I approve, and since I don't really care about either of these bands, I'll give my neighbors my proxy vote."
--Studio 176

"How did this seemingly Michigan based crowd make KISS a 13 seed? I'm going with Fleetwood Mac partly for the better music, partly because my Halloween costume this past October was Stevie Nicks and Mark and Hootie kept asking me about my fajita roll-ups."
--The Curator
(Commissioner's Note: Actually, it's not as Michigan based as you might think, though that is where the largest plurality lies.)

"I CAN NOT believe KISS is a #13!!! How devastating. And to think that the class of '96 Stevenson Pom Pon seniors won the kickline competition to "I Wanna Rock and Roll All Night." That fact alone should have boosted the band into single digits. I am going to vote for KISS and, out of solidarity for the band, I will cast no other votes in any election today. This
is a sad, sad day for all fans of Gene Simmons and his bunch."
--Wimmah

"Fleetwood Mac--Um, Rumours? Best breakup album ever? Hello there. Not even Rivers Cuomo can be a persuasive force here."
--The Raging Lemur

"Did Fleetwood Mac teach America's youth how to set up concert pyro on 3-2-1 Contact? Did Stevie, Mick, Lindsay and company save concert-goers from the Phantom of the Park? Did Fleetwood Mac appear on a Paul Lynde Christmas? HECK NO!!!

Only one band fits the description, and that's why they advance. Besides, KISS recorded the greatest power ballad ever recorded in "Beth.""
--A Voice of America

"Fleetwood Mac. Both they and KISS have their uses, and their influences. Both can make for pleasant radio listening. Both embarass themselves more every year. I'm going with Fleetwood Mac because I think they have a deeper bench."
--The Answer Guy--Live from Dixville Notch!

"Fleetwood Mac, because Gene Simmons is such an idiot and KISS has never been much more than a business venture."
--GZ

"You wanted the best and you got the best! The hottest band in the world....KISS!!!"
--RickT

" In the early 80's, I owned a Ben Cooper "Peter Criss" Halloween costume, and I went Trick or Treating in it; I never had the desire to go as Mick Fleetwood. I've never seen Lindsey Buckingham spit out blood, and only having one potential witch in your outfit doesn't hold a candle to right-wing fundies claiming that you all work for Satan. Finally, when I went to see "Daredevil" at Regal Cinemas, I didn't have to sit through a bad commercial for a KISS album, so I think we have a winner."
--VwlssWndr

"Fleetwood Mac - No connections, but I'm not planning to be inducted into the KISS army anytime soon."
--The Virginian

"Fleetwood Mac. Do we really know it's the same guys behind the KISS makeup? Maybe they've been licensed and we don't know it. Something like that Holiday Inn Express commercial could actually be true."
--BrickHouse

" KISS. Stevie Nicks is a more contrived persona than any KISS character. Plus Fleetwood Mac never appeared in a Howard the Duck comic."
--Gerbil #1

"KISS (Greg perfectly summarized the vibe I get out of Kraft Fleet and Macaroni ,it's the cheesiest.)"
--The Good Doctor

---

Today's Matchups from the Mid-South Regional, at Thompson-Bolling Arena
in Knoxville, TN

# 3 Guns n' Roses
vs.
#14 Three Dog Night

Guns n' Roses: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Civil War
You Could Be Mine
Welcome to the Jungle
Sweet Child O' Mine
Patience
Paradise City
November Rain
Nightrain
Mr. Brownstone
Don't Cry

Three Dog Night: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Joy to the World
Easy to Be Hard
Family of Man
Sure as I'm Sittin' Here
An Old Fashioned Love Song
Mama Told Me (Not to Come)
Try a Little Tenderness
Shambala
Never Been to Spain
Black and White
Pieces of April
The Show Must Go On
Eli's Coming
One
Play Something Sweet (Brickyard Blues)

#11 Earth, Wind, and Fire
vs.
# 6 The Four Tops

Earth, Wind, and Fire: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
I'll Write a Song for You
Fantasy
Megamix [Radio Edit]
Reasons
Let's Groove
After the Love Has Gone
September
That's the Way of the World
Shining Star
Boogie Wonderland

The Four Tops: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Baby I Need Your Loving
Ask the Lonely
I Can't Help Myself (Sugar Pie, Honey Bunch)
Reach Out (I'll Be There)
Standing in the Shadows of Love
Bernadette
Shake Me, Wake Me (When It's Over)
Walk Away Renee
If I Were a Carpenter
Still Water
Ain't No Woman (Like the One I've Got)

---

Today's Matchups from the Mid-South Regional, at McKenzie Arena
in Chattanooga, TN

# 7 Red Hot Chili Peppers
vs.
#10 Bill Halley and the Comets

Red Hot Chili Peppers: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Higher Ground
Knock Me Down
Fight Like a Brave
Taste the Pain
If You Want Me to Stay
Breaking the Girl
Give It Away
Blood Sugar Sex Magik
Under the Bridge
Love Rollercoaster
Soul to Squeeze
My Friends
Californication
Scar Tissue
Otherside

Bill Halley and the Comets: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Rock Around the Clock
Thirteen Women
See You Later, Alligator
Sway With Me
Choo Choo Ch'boogie
Razzle-Dazzle
Shake, Rattle and Roll
Skinny Minnie
The Saints Rock 'N' Roll
Burn That Candle
Joey's Song

#15 Oasis
vs.
# 2 Talking Heads

Oasis: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Cigarettes and Alcohol
Supersonic
Live Forever
Whatever
Wonderwall
Some Might Say
Champagne Supernova
Don't Look Back in Anger
Slide Away
All Around the World
Stand by Me
Go Let It Out
The Hindu Times
Stop Crying Your Heart Out

Talking Heads: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB and GS
Take Me to the River
Psycho Killer
Once in a Lifetime
Life During Wartime
Heaven
Crosseyed and Painless
Burning Down the House
And She Was
Road to Nowhere
This Must Be the Place (Naive Melody)
Memories Can't Wait
Love --> Building On Fire
Stay Up Late
Cities
Don't Worry About The Government
Girlfriend Is Better
Swamp
Making Flippy Floppy

That's all for today, until tomorrow,
I'm Craig Barker, Big Ten, plus 20%.

Thought for the Day: Leave it to our Teutonic Friends the Germans...
May 5, 2003

First things first:
Given the amount of personal schadenfreuede I am feeling right now, I am sure that there is a personal seat in Hell waiting for me with my name on it. But if it means that E-19 remains my domain for another year, well, I'll take it, consquences be damned.

To ripoff Kathleen Madigan:
"Why is Cinco de Mayo such a big day in Mexico? All they did is beat the French. Everybody does that!"

Oh and by the way, in the great line from the weekend:
"For Alabama, the Price was wrong...Bitch..."

Pistons enjoy Game 7 romp at home
So did the fans, bring on the Answer, because we got one question? "Do you fear the 'fro?"

Today's highlights:
From AP US History:
Supreme Court case review...

From World History:
China: Part II

From International Relations:
I was really all over the place, but it was more about the Soviets.

---

The Barker 128-Band Tournament of Champions--Day 11
Vote by logging into the comments widget or emailing me by 10:00 pm EDT TUESDAY. We'll tally and post the results then.

OK, that is all. Thank you, and let's be careful out there.
--The Commissioner

---

Yesterday's Results from the Deep South Regional, at New Orleans Arena in New Orleans, LA
# 3 Pink Floyd--33 votes
#14 The Violent Femmes--12 votes
Abstentions: 2
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"Violent Femmes, in a tough one. Gordon Gano's appearance on "The Adventures of Pete & Pete" swings it. "Blister in the Sun" may get too much attention, but "Kiss Off", "Add it Up", and "Gone Daddy Gone" are very underrated."
--GZ

"Pink Floyd in a walkover. I second Rick; Floyd is at worst a #2."
--The Answer Guy

"The Violent Femmes-because I like American Music."
--Elizabeth

"Violent Femmes, even though Elizabeth took my line."
--The Stepson of Troy

"Floyd vs. the Femmes? You're killing me here! I'm
voting for Floyd here, and this is why. Roger Waters' self-absorbed paranoia spoke deeply to me when I was 14. It continues to speak to me and this is why I'm self-absorbed and paranoid and continue to drag CPA-ONE (who has a job, woo-hoo!) to tribute show after tribute show. Also, there are few greater things than the second solo in Comfy Numb. Though I come down on the Waters side of the divorce, David Gilmour is a god. I love a man who can make a Strat sing, and Dave can do that. And, lord, his voice--does anyone else ever want to roll over and have a cigarette after listening to a live version of Saucerful of Secrets? Heaven, pure heaven. I must say a word about the Violent Femmes here--they're a wonderful band, and I thank the one who taught me to appreciate them. You know who you are;)."
--Darth Underwriter

"Oh what the Hell, I'll go with the Violent Femmes. As genius as some of Floyd is, I just can't get the images of stoners lining up for concerts and laser Floyd shows out of my head. Besides, who doesn't secretly really like 'Blister in the Sun?'"
--The Curator

"Two words for you. Laser Floyd. We're going Pink on this one."
--Marist MU

---

#11 Dave Matthews Band--10 votes
# 6 The Doors--36 votes
Abstentions: 1
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"The Doors. I've said it before and I'll say it again: Naked Indians rule. Score one point for interracial homoeroticism."
--Dirty Midwest

"Much as I like DMB, The Doors. I think their fate was sealed when Craig listed "All Along The Watchtower" as one of their best songs (I would have replaced it with The Christmas Song, but whaddayagonnado)."
--Pentagon Player
(Commissioner's Note: Having been to three Dave Matthews Band concerts, trust me, Watchtower is a highlight, even if it is a cover.)

"DMB - Ok, those of you who know me know reason #1 why I'm picking them. But there's also some Jim Morrison animosity going here. I think Denis Leary summarized it best with his review of Oliver Stone's film.."I'm nobody, I'm famous, I'm drunk, I'm dead" (it went something like that)"
--The Virginian

"The Doors. I think The Doors are vastly overrated; however, the #6 seed actually seems about right. Against many groups, I would go the other way. However, against DMB, I'd probably vote for Hootie and the Blowfish among other groups ahead of DMB. Now don't get me wrong, some of DMB's early stuff is OK, but after a while the fandom and their reaction to the fandom has made it easy for me to hate them. You almost wonder if they'd be palatable if Dave goes the way of Jim Morrison. Eh, maybe not."
--JQSmooth

"The Doors--Gotta love the organ. (that can be taken in a couple of ways...)"
--The Scientist

"Speaking as if I was one of the Resident Directors I know (she happens to be an Irish émigré,) "Mother Mary and Joseph, end DMB now!" The Doors all the way through this round, please!!!"
--Law and Gerbil: SDV

"When I think of DMB, I see a multitude of clean-cut young fellas wearing plaid shirts and baseball caps, chugging their Miller Lights and pumping their fists.

AAAAAAAHHHH! Please, give me drugs and death and Rimbaud over that anytime."
--The Raging Lemur

---

Yesterday's Results from the Deep South Regional, at Alltel Arena in Little Rock, AR

# 7 Dire Straits--30 votes
#10 Black Sabbath--12 votes
Abstentions: 4
Oncoming Traffic: 1

Match Comments (Best only):
"Dire Straits, echoing Greg and Hayden, if you ever get the opportunity to pick up Mark Knopfler Screenplaying, do it. Cuts from the soundtracks of Last Exit to Brooklyn, Princess Bride, and Local Hero. Best sampler platter CD I ever owned, and whoever has my copy, give it back or I'm gonna kick your ass."
--The Good Doctor

"Black Sabbath. How many bands can say they single-handedly launched a style of music that is still in existance over thirty years later? These are the godfathers of heavy metal, friends, and one of the best bands of the genre and of all time. That great bands such as Metallica claim them as an influence and are still seeded higher is a travesty. That Sabbath even needed to go through a second cut to get here is a joke."
--RickT

"The late Douglas Adams slipped into one of his "Hitchhiker's" novels a paean to the sheer liquid sexiness of Mark Knopfler's guitar sound. I couldn't agree more. Besides, Knopfler proved his versatility by writing one of the all-time classics of my favorite genre (curmudgeon
rock), "Money For Nothing". I don't begrudge Ozzy his resilience or his status as a pop icon, but I'll have to pick Dire Straits."
--The BugDoctor

"Dire Straits. For a few weeks, I thought "Sultans of Swing" was about the Concert for Bangladesh."
--BrickHouse

---

#15 Squeeze--14 votes
# 2 Aerosmith--33 votes
Abstentions: 0
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"Squeeze! Previously I compared REM to Woody Allen, in that the crap on the resume was gaining a majority over the legitimate good stuff. Aerosmith ain't even that close. They're like BLAKE EDWARDS-- a scant few years of goodness, and a full twenty-plus years of suck suck suck. They're the weakest high seed in this event."
--Gerbil #1

"Squeeze. Aerosmith and Squeeze have produced about an equal number of songs I like. Squeeze has produced many, many less songs written by Dianne Warren."
--The Vaccinator

"Squeeze. No, I can't think of anything other than "Tempted" that they did. But I'd listen to "Tempted" about 30,000 times before overplay would overcome the special kind of hatred I have for most of Aerosmith's oeuvre, "Toys In The Attic" excepted. That and Steven Tyler frightens me."
--Studio 176

"Aerosmith. I could live without their recent stuff but where would rap have been without Walk This Way?"
--JoeF

"Aerosmith. "Dream On" never fails to grow old on me."
--Penguin in the City

"Squeeze? Got a higher seed than NWA? Let alone into this tournament? At least I'd have to think about Aerosmith versus, say, Ace of Base. This ought to have blowout written all over it... and in subsequent rounds, please remove that piece of garbage that is "I Don't Want to Miss a Thing" from Aerosmith's song highlights. If not for Ghetto Supastar, it would be the most overplayed song on what little radio I've listened to."
--Doctor RutgersPantsToBe

"Aerosmith. Then again, as much as I harp on longevity for this tournament, this is one band whose longevity cripples it. Aerosmith would actually be a significantly better band if everything it had recorded since Pump were actually from some other band. The further I read from the song "highlights," the more tempted I was to think upset here, except that they weren't up against an opponent worthy of pulling the upset. "Tempted by the fruit of another," indeed."
--The Bruce

"Squeeze -- For the simple reason that any Aerosmith greatest hits album will include songs past their Run-DMC collaboration on "Walk This Way." I’ve always believed that Aerosmith was better when they were all on the junk."
--The Wizard of Babson Park

"Squeeze, easily. Did God ever make a man uglier than Steven Tyler? Even Geddy Lee is better looking. Slightly."
--Mrs. Gerbil #1

---

Today's Matchups from the Mid-South Regional, at Stegeman Coliseum in Athens, GA

# 1 The Clash
vs.
#16 Lyle Lovett and His Large Band

The Clash: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
White Riot
Clash City Rockers
(White Man) In Hammersmith Palais
Tommy Gun
English Civil War
I Fought the Law
London Calling
Train in Vain (Stand by Me)
Bankrobber
The Call Up
Hitsville U.K.
The Magnificent Seven
This Is Radio Clash
Know Your Rights
Rock the Casbah
Should I Stay or Should I Go?

Lyle Lovett and His Large Band: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
You Can't Resist It
That's Right (You're Not from Texas)
She's Already Made Up Her Mind
L.A. County
I've Been to Memphis
If I Were the Man You Wanted
If I Had a Boat
Here I Am
God Will
Give Back My Heart

# 9 Sly and the Family Stone
vs.
# 8 KC and the Sunshine Band

Sly and the Family Stone: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Everybody Is a Star
Hot Fun in the Summertime
Thank You (Falettinme Be Mice Elf Agin)
Family Affair
Stand!
Sing a Simple Song
I Want to Take You Higher
Everyday People
If You Want Me to Stay
Dance to the Music

KC and the Sunshine Band: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
That's the Way (I Like It)
Please Don't Go
Keep It Comin' Love
I'm Your Boogie Man
Give It Up
Boogie Shoes
Get Down Tonight
(Shake, Shake, Shake) Shake Your Booty
Wrap Your Arms Around Me
Sound Your Funky Horn

---

Today's Matchups from the Mid-South Regional, at Carolina Center in Columbia, SC

# 5 The Band
vs.
#12 The Steve Miller Band

The Band: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Chest Fever
Stage Fright
The Shape I'm In
Tears of Rage
King Harvest (Has Surely Come)
The Weight
Up on Cripple Creek
Rag Mama Rag
The Night They Drove Old Dixie Down
It Makes No Difference

The Steve Miller Band: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Swingtown
Jungle Love
Take the Money and Run
Rock 'N Me
True Fine Love
The Stake
The Joker
Fly Like an Eagle
Threshold/Jet Airliner
Dance, Dance, Dance
Winter Time
Wild Mountain Honey
Abracadabra
Keeps Me Wondering Why
Heart Like a Wheel

#13 KISS
vs.
# 4 Fleetwood Mac

KISS: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Crazy Crazy Nights
I Was Made for Lovin' You
Detroit Rock City
Lick It Up
Hard Luck Woman
Calling Dr. Love
Beth
Love Gun
God of Thunder
Sure Know Something
Deuce
Do You Love Me
Strutter
Rock and Roll All Nite
Plaster Caster
Hotter Than Hell

Fleetwood Mac: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
You Make Loving Fun
Say You Love Me
Rhiannon
Oh Well
Monday Morning
Landslide
Go Your Own Way
Dreams
Don't Stop
The Chain

That's all for today, until tomorrow,
I'm Craig Barker, rolling Tide.

Thought for the Day: X-Men Premiership
May 2, 2003

First things first:
Kicking off the summer movie season, tomorrow's viewing of X2: X-Men United, which I swear sounds like they should be playing in the English Premiership against Charlton Athletic.

Today's highlights:
From AP US History:
Test, no big whoop.

From World History:
China, more than just the stuff on your kitchen hutch.

From International Relations:
Why it's so hard to install a democracy in a nation that lacks a democratic tradition.

Random Simpsons Quote:
Kent: "So, once again, I've been had."

---

The Barker 128-Band Tournament of Champions--Day 10

Vote by logging into the comments widget or emailing me by 8:00 pm EST MONDAY. We'll tally and post the results then.

Thank you all for your support in the tie-breaker rant, I did not mean to lash out against all of you, but it is not an easy thing. I realized as we go through this thing, it's not about the voting, it's not about who wins, it's maybe about the chance to let people talk about their favorite music where others will hear them. And like anytime we discuss music, there will be differences of opinion, but if we can respect and acknowledge that, we can have a lot of fun.

And maybe I should rant more often, I had the highest voter turnout since Day 1 :)

OK, that is all. Thank you, and let's be careful out there.
--The Commissioner

---

Yesterday's Results from the Deep South Regional, at the Pete Maravich Assembly Center in Baton Rogue, LA
# 1 The Who--41 votes
#16 NWA--09 votes
Abstentions: 2
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"The Who. You know, NWA is undoubtedly important. They probably don't cite The Who as an antecedent, but they could and maybe should. A number of Who songs (big chunks of "Quadrophenia" in particular) are given over to vaguely political critiques of being young, frutstrated and working-class, complete with frank depictions of sex and/or violence that bluenoses of the time couldn't really deal with. Townsend and Daltrey were there years before Ice Cube."
--The Answer Guy

"NWA. Especially during the 1989 Flair-Steamboat trilogy."
--The Brown Martyr of QB

"The Who. That being said, has anyone else seen the new Northwest Airlines plane paint scheme and wondered if they're planning a new hub in Compton?"
--The Virginian
(Commissioner's Note: Good, so it's not just me.)

"NWA. I know that all you uncultured swine will vote for The Who, but clearly NWA is by far the superior choice for the intellectual listener."
--Deeez Nuuuts

"The Who. Can anyone band that remains intelligible really match them for sheer punch? Heck, they're practically the godfathers of all the hard rock youth anthems that were to come. Besides Boris the Spider is cool."
--JoeF

"The Who. I have no particular fondness for them, and despite its success in Barker tourney #1 and a subsequent google search for the lyrics, I still don't know what "Baba O'Reilly" is. But thanks to them we got the Buffy scene where Giles was doing "Behind Blue Eyes" acoustic in a coffee house, to the shock and dismay of all. And that was just cool."
--Stepson of Troy

"NWA--Tough call, since both Pete Townshend and Jeff Jarrett can break guitars with the best of them. But the talent of the X-Division overtakes....whoops, wrong NWA :P

Seriously, I have to go with the Harvard-Stanford upset. NWA was a pioneering outfit that brought hard, street-cred hip-hop to the mainstream. Ice Cube, Dr. Dre and Eazy-E achieved tremendous success as solo artists, producers and music executives. And Mr. Cube has made a successful transition to acting and film-making.

Maybe it's me, but I consider NWA as an act that can be imitated but never duplicated, while you can switch the Who with, say, Led Zeppelin and you can't tell the difference."
--A Voice of America

"The Who over NWA. Maybe because I just finished watching CSI..."
--The Dartmouth Hoosier

"The Who. Though I'm not a fan, but CSI opening credits music gets them my vote in this early round."
--Roblong

"The Who – But, more importantly, NWA is a SIXTEEN SEED?!?!?!?!? Were some of these drawn from hat? By what measure would NWA not be a higher seed than the Squirrel Nut Zippers? One defined and changed a style of music irreversably, the other is the best North Carolina band named for a candy made in Massachusetts. WTF?"
--The Wizard of Babson Park

"I'm going to go with The Who because one year I went to a Drum Corps International competition with my Jimdad and one of the corps did an entire Ode to Tommy. Now that's a trippy flag routine. As entertaining as an NWA marching band and color guard routine would be, I have yet to see one. Perhaps I should add creating said routine to my list of things to accomplish before I die."
--The Curator

"Wait, NWA is a 16 and the Cars are a 5? You're kidding me. I believe it's time for my first official "F this S rant."

The Who made great music. No doubt about it. Tommy was a first of its kind performance and a work of sheer brilliance. HOWEVER...rock would have been ok without the Who. NWA is the most influential group of the past 25 years. Period. End of Story. You can pull out Nirvana and Pearl Jam, but face it, they just took Rock, a well established genre, and took it away from glam to make it depressing. Rock would have survived without them. Rap as a genre exists solely because of NWA. Run DMC and the Beastie Boys were nice, but no one's parents objected to them so they were no big deal. NWA brought rap to the suburbs and to the main stream. I remember the first time my friends and I (in grade school nonetheless) heard "Straight Outta Compton" and looked at each other and said "You can't say nigger! They wouldn't let you record that!" Every artist in the genre since the release of that album owes their career to NWA. No force has exerted itself on popular culture the way rap has in the last 25 years. Clothing, clubs, movies, television and network news. What made Tipper Gore famous? Pick up 2 Live Crew featuring Luke Skywalker and you'll remember. We all know someone who's got a great conspiracy theory about how Biggie and Tupac are both still alive and the deaths were faked to settle the feud. Been to the movies lately? Then you've seen Eminem, DMX or Ja-Rule in a flick. Why? All because of NWA, because of the groundwork laid when the genre was young. To this day the early tracks written by Dr. Dre and Ice Cube and Easy E are still quoted in other music of all genres - pop, rock, country, metal, you name it, it's there. For NWA to be a 16 seed is tantamount to crime. They get the vote."
--Marist MU

---

# 9 Roxy Music--15 votes
# 8 Santana--33 votes
Abstentions: 1
Oncoming Traffic: 3

Match Comments (Best only):
"Who the hell is Roxy Music? Give me Santana, and let's not discuss Shaman. EVER."
--Dirty Midwest

"Viva Carlos Santana! *mmmmmm....guitar mastery -- I do this for slowhand and Jimi, too... *"
--Penguin in the City

"Riddle me this: How is Santana really a band? Everyone knows it's just Carlos and his guitar. At any rate, Roxy Music had one truly brilliant album, *Avalon*, and to me that's enough to give them the right to undoubtedly be clobbered by the Who in the next round. Yawn."
--Studio 176

"Carlos Santana, philosopher extraordinaire, says, "You know the question, 'Which came first, the chicken or the egg?' Well, the answer is the electron." How can you vote against that? It's so profound. I hope you can smell the sarcasm, because apparently if it's not figure skating, ABBA, or orange, I apparently have no sense of humor, but anyway, Santana still rocks and rocks this vote."
--Senor AsLongAsYouKnowWhereYourWeaknessesLiePants

"Oncoming Traffic! This is my first time using that option, and one that for this particular tournament I think should be used lightly if at all. Little known fact about me (surprising that such things still exist): I absolutely LOATHE the music of Santana. Drives me up a wall. Meanwhile, Roxy Music are everything that's wrong with glam. (Odd coming from someone who admits he's a Poison fan, but there you go.)"
--The Bruce

"Santana: See, to be a good band, you actually have to be HEARD of. But again, I'll save that rant for a future competitor."
--The Carolina Cable Guy

---

Yesterday's Results from the Deep South Regional, at O'Connell Center in Gainesville, FL
# 5 The Cars--38 votes
#12 The Four Seasons--11 votes
Abstentions: 3
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
" The Cars. I'm surprised that the Cars were seeded this high, but I understand exactly why. The entire collection of Cars songs that you might want to listen to, fits exactly in the length of a double album. When you listen it's like it all the meal you want to eat, and not one atom more."
--The Good Doctor

"The Caaaahhhhs all the way! I refuse to vote for the group that permanently inflicted "December 1963" on the cover-band circuit. An entire generation's worth of weddings, proms, and anniversary parties have since been treated to dance-floor revisits of a song about some
bozo's one-night stand with a barfly. (Y'know, I'd kind of like to hear the lyrics of that one passed through the Elmer Fudd-u-lator ....)"
--The Bug Doctor

"It's key to know when the double handclaps start in "Best Friends Girl". You don't wanna be that loser who starts too early. Additional props to Mr. Ocasek for his production credits on the eponymous Weezer albums."
--The Raging Lemur

"The Cars. Lots of goodies on both sides, but Drive is irresistable."
--RickT

"The Cars. Do you realize both groups have a significant hit, some would argue their best song, sung by someone other than the lead singer for the other 99% of their tunes (Drive and December 1963 (Oh What a Night))?
I dated a girl named Sherri. Some of her ex-boyfriends formed a support group. We got really drunk one night singing,'Sherri, won't you **** off and die.'"
--BrickHouse

"The Cars. Valli's falsetto isn't too convincing on "Walk Like a Man," but I think we can all derive encouragement from looking at photos of Rick Ocasek with his wife."
--VwlssWndr

"The Cars. A solid pop-rock band whose stuff is alternately annoying and entertaining, depending on your point of view. How much of the falsetto can you take with The Four Seasons anyway?"
--JQSmooth

---

#13 James Brown & the JB's--22 votes
# 4 Run-DMC--28 votes
Abstentions: 0
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"Run DMC is a great, key band in the history of rap. But TH-WMiSB is like Danny Manning cubed. He gets mucho bonus points for his appearance in Undercover Brother and playing off Chris Kattan for "Say It Loud" - easily one of the most hilarious sequences of 2002."
--The Pentagon Player

"James Brown & The JBs -- This is another problematic one since like Prince and the Revolution this is a case of a band that backed only a small part of a brilliant artist's long and varied career. The JBs were not put together until 1970 when most of Brown's old band was fired or quit in short succession and he ended up throwing together a bunch of young punks including one William "Bootsy" Collins. The JBs played on the studio versions of only a handful of the song highlights you mention below. However, their new songs went places James had never found before and they played those old hits even better than the old lineup ever did as evidenced by the live album Sex Machine which features, I believe, five tracks by the new band and the rest by the old band. The biggest quantum leap was Bootsy's impossibly slithering bass lines but the whole band added a ferocious energy to the early 70s records that was beyond Brown's already potent previous lineup. P-Funk may have freed the funk from the pyramids, but James Brown created the funk in the pyramids in the first place and it was the JBs who were there for the ultimate expression of that funk."
--The One-Eyed Squirrel

"James Brown, in a match clearly set up by The Man. A Run-DMC greatest hits collection might include tracks off of "Crown Royal", while the entire James Brown catalog contains solid material."
--GZ

" This is the most painful matchup of the tournament, and the winner should automatically be in the final 8. James Brown it is. Even isolating his work with the JBs, you've hot a classic setlist, not to mention the important role this music had in civil rights history. The dynamics between frontman and band were part of every James Brown single, and especially the live shows.

Besides, Run carried Darryl. C'mon. DMC was really bad, even before his voice problems."
--Gerbil #1

"Run-DMC, partly because the Godfather has always felt like a solo artist, partly because despite my middle school having the demographics of Provo, Run-DMC was the biggest thing in my school for about 6 months, anything that breaks the tyranny of 12 years of hair metal worship does a body good."
--The Good Doctor

"This is rough, James Brown solo is a no-brainer, but I'm giving the edge to Run-DMC on this one."
--PittBill

"Upset Special - James Brown and the JBs - How can you not vote for the guy that created the music that Run DMC eventually built off of. Please! Help me! Good God!"
--Law and Gerbil: SDV

"Run-DMC: Are you kidding me? They're the group that got me into rap in '85-'86. I had given up on rock 'n roll in the early 80's cause everything sucked and was synthesized (except U2 and a couple of punk bands). Then rappers emerged and provided me with something worth listening to until grunge."
--The Mentor

---

Today's Matchups from the Deep South Regional, at New Orleans Arena in New Orleans, LA

# 3 Pink Floyd
vs.
#14 The Violent Femmes

Pink Floyd: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Insterstellar Overdrive
Wish You Were Here
Shine on You Crazy Diamond, Pts. 1-5
Comfortably Numb
Another Brick in the Wall, Pt. 2
See Emily Play
Arnold Layne
Astronomy Dominé
One of These Days
Us and Them

The Violent Femmes: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Kiss Off
Gone Daddy Gone
Add It Up
American Music
Blister in the Sun
Promise
I Hear the Rain
Hallowed Ground
Children of the Revolution
Nightmares

#11 Dave Matthews Band
vs.
# 6 The Doors

Dave Matthews Band: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Too Much
Crash Into Me
What Would You Say
Satellite
Ants Marching
All Along the Watchtower
Stay (Wasting Time)
Crush
The Space Between
I Did It
#41
Where Are You Going

The Doors: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
L.A. Woman
Touch Me
Roadhouse Blues
Riders on the Storm
People Are Strange
Love Me Two Times
Love Her Madly
Light My Fire
Hello, I Love You
The End

---

Today's Matchups from the Deep South Regional, at Alltel Arena in Little Rock, AR

# 7 Dire Straits
vs.
#10 Black Sabbath

Dire Straits: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Solid Rock
So Far Away
Brothers in Arms
Skateaway
Walk of Life
Tunnel of Love
Sultans of Swing
Romeo and Juliet
Money for Nothing
Six Blade Knife
Ride Across the River

Black Sabbath: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
War Pigs
N.I.B.
Black Sabbath
Sweet Leaf
Iron Man
Paranoid
Wheels of Confusion
Hand of Doom
Tomorrow's Dream
Symptom of the Universe

#15 Squeeze
vs.
# 2 Aerosmith

Squeeze: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Black Coffee in Bed
Goodbye Girl
Take Me, I'm Yours
Up the Junction
Is That Love
Tempted
Pulling Mussels (From the Shell)
If I Didn't Love You
Another Nail in My Heart
I've Returned

Aerosmith: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB
Dream On
Walk This Way
Sweet Emotion
Dude (Looks Like a Lady)
Janie's Got a Gun
Love in an Elevator
What It Takes
Livin' on the Edge
Cryin'
Amazing
Crazy
I Don't Want To Miss a Thing
Jaded
Just Push Play

That's all for today, until tomorrow,
I'm Craig Barker, X-Man Wednesday.

Thought for the Day: Tie-broken
May 1, 2003

First things first:
My rant lies beneath...

---

The Barker 128-Band Tournament of Champions--Day 09
Vote by logging into the comments widget or emailing me by 8:00 pm EST FRIDAY. We'll tally and post the results then.

So, i have been getting a lot of flack for my tie-breaking decisions. Trust me completely when I say that I would much rather not have had to make any of these decisions. The problem is that for some reason, we have had more ties in this tournament than we have had the previous two COMBINED (I think...I don't feel like doing the research.)

The odds of having overtime almost everyday, they just can't be this high...And then I get alternately accused of being a music snob or too mainstream/white bread. Frankly, I'm getting sick of it, I can't make all of you happy, so deal with it, we're just having a little fun here.

OK, that is all. Thank you, and let's be careful out there.
--The Commissioner

---

Yesterday's Results from the Heartland Regional, at Erwin Center in Austin, TX
# 3 The Beastie Boys--36 votes
#14 Boston--10 votes
Abstentions: 2
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
" There was a local publication that once theorized that musical groups named after geographic entities sucked in direct proportion to the size of the landmass they were named after. Therefore, Chicago & Boston sucked. Kansas sucked worse. America and Europe even more. And worst of all on the suck scale, Asia.

And who am I to argue with science? Go Beasties!"
--Studio 176

"Beasties. I bought License to Ill on vinyl, brought it home, put it on, and my jaw literally dropped."
--Gerbil #1

"Boston: The Beastie Boys' entire claim to fame can be summed up thusly: (1) they're (arguably) rappers, and (2) they're white. Boston, on the other hand, has the 11th best selling album of all time."
--The Vaccinator

"#14-Boston. Some of the best guitar solos ever, from a band who really knew how to produce a beautiful sound."
--The Bruce

"Boston. It really doesn't matter now, but seeding the Beastie Boys here is another one of those "What the fucks?" in this tournament. Really. What the fuck? A three-seed? I mean, this would be like actually seeding Anna Kournikova at the US Open this year given her one win on tour, except that the Beastie Boys don't have the sex appeal going for them, or the talent. Come to think of it, seeding Kournikova would be more reasonable."
--Senor JKel

"Beastie Boys--The Boston recipe; record an album, wait seven years, record another album of recycled material, repeat."
--A Voice of America

"Beasties: Wow. Boston. Hand me another 'lude, dude. 70's AOR may be the worst phenomenon in rock, besides Progressive (same thing, in some cases). Check out the Hoodoo Gurus' song "Less Than a Feeling" for more on this issue."
--Blasmo

"Boston has tremendous virtuosity but exhibits no soul whatsoever (although they do get brownie points for giving Zorak a ride in their spacecraft). The Beasties, if we're to believe Futurama, will still be rocking in the year 3000. The old New Englander will surprise
you and vote for the Beastie Boys."
--The Bug Doc

"The Beastie Boys have the ability to unite white people of all colors -- they are the Elvis of hiphop, making it palatable if not safe for the suburbs. though their sub-Run DMC debut will forever be their calling card, the real gems are the Dust Brothers' patchwork of brilliance Paul's Boutique and the organic 70s funk meets hiphop Check Your Head. Boston... you'd think that 8 years between albums would make for interesting and challenging music, but the greatest part is the silent gap itself."
--The Private Jet

---

#11 ZZ Top--20 votes
# 6 Green Day--26 votes
Abstentions: 2
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"ZZ Top - First off, I'm tired of hearing that "Good Riddance" song.
Secondly, ZZ Top gets full advantage from the home crowd, as pod seeding works in their favor (since La Grange lies between Austin and Houston)
Third, the Eliminator. How can you vote against the Eliminator?!!"
--Virginian

"ZZ Top way too many freshman college girls singing basket case in the halls."
--PittBill

"Green Day. Because ZZ Top were just enabling Clinton when they gave him the keys to the Eliminator. They're the real people at fault for the impeachment."
--GZ

"When I learn guitar, I will have to learn "She" very early, because that is my song for expressing my frustration. Also, then one off of dookie where he's gonna shoot everyone? I play that a little too much at work."
--The Raging Lemur

"I would like to see an actual street fight between Green Day and ZZ Top - I think that would just be simply hysterical. While I presume the bearded ones would win, I think Green Day would get more time on the hypothetical soundtrack."
--The Curator

---

Yesterday's Results from the Heartland Regional, at United Spirit Arena in Lubbock, TX

# 7 Chicago--23 votes
#10 Frank Zappa and the Mothers of Invention--23 votes
Abstentions: 2
Oncoming Traffic: 0

OVERTIME: Commissioner Breaks Tie...Chicago advances.
Reason 1: I don't need a reason. I'm voting for Chicago.

Match Comments (Best only):
"Chicago...and may God have mercy on my soul. Frank Zappa is for rock critics too proud to ask themselves: "What the f**k was that piece of s**t?" Give me syrupy goodness any day of the week."
--RickT

"Chicago. If this were a knife fight, I have no doubt that it would end with Peter Cetera watching as Frank stood over him eating his still beating heart. But Chicago is a hard habit to break."
--SpartanSteve

"Frank Zappa and the Mothers of Invention. Back when College Bowl was on CBS Radio, I played in a game with the following question: "Some say he's a genius. Some say he's crazy. I don't want your opinion, I just want to know who he is. Listen and for 10 points, tell me who's singing." Frank got about two words of "Montana" out before I buzzed in."
--BrickHouse

"Chicago. Sure you can't really tell between Chicago with or without Peter Cetera (and vice versa actually), but they made some pretty decent pop songs in their day."
--JQSmooth

"I have to go Chicago here. I can't get the images of Daniel-san out of my mind. Peter Cetera is right up there with Steve Perry on my friend Tracy's list of 5. In fact, I think I might be adding him to mine right now. I AM THE MAN...WHO WILL FIGHT...FOR YOUR HONOR. I'LL BE THE HERO...THAT YOU'VE BEEN DREAMING OF..."
--Marist MU

---

#15 Squirrel Nut Zippers--07 votes
# 2 U2--41 votes
Abstentions: 0
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"U2. This isn't even Duke-Winthrop. This is Tennessee vs. Cow Chip State in the Women's NCAA Tournament."
--The Answer Guy

"SNZ, in spite of U2's suspiciously long and suspiciously alphabetized song highlights. What, did you have Dick Bavetta make that list for you, Mr. Commissioner?"
--Stepson of Troy
(Commissioner's Note: Good sir, the original list was 45 songs, so this was clearly restraint.)

"Statistics show that nine out of ten dentists prefer U2 in this matchup. It would have been ten out of ten, but you know those squirrels ..."
--The Pentagon Player

"4. Squirrel Nut Zippers. My top mission is to make Genesis die in a horrible pit of hell, so why not have the Zippers do it? I'll be voting against U2 all tournament, by the way."
--Dirty Midwest

"# 2 U2 - I just don't understand this group's fascination with Squirrel Nut Zippers, though I do expect them to benefit from the animosity over U2's previous success in the tournaments."
--The Lady Keenan

"U2 -- So let's see, the Squirrel Nut Zippers greatest hits album would look like this:

Side A: "Hell"
Side B: "Hell" (reprise)

Why are they in this again? And how did they get a 15 seed? Favorable memories of the candy?"
--The Wizard of Babson Park

"U2 - Even the guy whose list handle is "One Eyed Squirrel" is voting for U2. Enough said."
--The One-Eyed Squirrel

---

Today's Matchups from the Deep South Regional, at the Pete Maravich Assembly Center in Baton Rogue, LA

# 1 The Who
vs.
#16 NWA

The Who: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Won't Get Fooled Again
Substitute
A Quick One, While He's Away
Pinball Wizard
My Generation
Magic Bus
The Kids Are Alright
I Can't Explain
I Can See for Miles
Behind Blue Eyes
Baba O'Riley
Eminence Front
Who Are You

NWA: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Real Niggaz Don't Die
Straight Outta Compton
Gangsta Gangsta
Express Yourself
100 Miles and Runnin'
8 Ball [Remix]
Appetite for Destruction
Just Don't Bite It
If It Ain't Ruff
Alwayz into Somethin'

# 9 Roxy Music
vs.
# 8 Santana

Roxy Music: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Love Is the Drug
Virginia Plain
Re-Make/Re-Model
Editions of You
Do the Strand
Thrill of It All
More Than This
Avalon
Pyjamarama
Jealous Guy

Santana: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Puesta del Sol
Oye Como Va
Jingo
Smooth
Toussaint l'Overture
Incident at Neshabur
Black Magic Woman/Gypsy Queen
Soul Sacrifice
Evil Ways
Hold On

---

Today's Matchups from the Deep South Regional, at O'Connell Center in Gainesville, FL

# 5 The Cars
vs.
#12 The Four Seasons

The Cars: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
My Best Friend's Girl
You Might Think
Shake It Up
Magic
Just What I Needed
Let The Good Times Roll
Drive
Bye Bye Love
I'm Not the One
Moving in Stereo

The Four Seasons: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Working My Way Back to You
Let's Hang On
Big Girls Don't Cry
December, 1963 (Oh, What a Night)
Walk Like a Man
Sherry
Rag Doll
Dawn (Go Away)
C'mon Marianne
Girl Come Running

#13 James Brown & the JB's
vs.
# 4 Run-DMC

James Brown and the JB's: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Get Up (I Feel Like Being A) Sex Machine
Brother Rapp, Pts. 1 & 2
Medley: Bewildered
I Got the Feelin'
Give It up or Turnit a Loose
I Don't Want Nobody to Give Me Nothing...
Licking Stick-Licking Stick
Lowdown Popcorn
Spinning Wheel
If I Ruled the World
There Was a Time
It's a Man's Man's Man's World
Please, Please, Please
I Can't Stand Myself
Mother Popcorn

Run-DMC: Song Highlights from AMG:
You Be Illin'
Walk This Way
Sucker M.C.'s (Krush-Groove 1)
Rock Box
King of Rock
It's Tricky
It's Like That
Run's House
Hard Times
Jam-Master Jay

That's all for today, until tomorrow,
I'm Craig Barker, funked up and pissed off.

Thought for the Day: Sleeping at random intervals...
April 30, 2003

First things first:
Whoops, fell asleep there, we'll pick it up tomorrow.

Today's highlights:
From AP US History:
The Paradox of Bill Clinton: Undisciplined Genius

From International Relations:
The start of the Soviet Union: Past and Present

Random Simpsons Quote:
Marge: "No no, I'm saying your one of the cute ducks.. who make fun of the ugly duck..."

---

The Barker 128-Band Tournament of Champions--Day 08

Vote by logging into the comments widget or emailing me by 10:00 pm EST THURSDAY. We'll tally and post the results then.

OK, that is all. Thank you, and let's be careful out there.
--The Commissioner

---

Yesterday's Results from the Great Lakes Regional, at Welsh-Ryan Arena in Evanston, IL
# 1 The Rolling Stones--40 votes
#16 T.Rex--07 votes
Abstentions: 0
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
""You Can't Always Get What You Want" is so much more fitting as a theme song for my life than "Get It On (Bang a Gong)" ever could be. One vote for the lips and the zombie on guitar!"
--VwlssWndr

"Rolling Stones - Here we go again, two of my favorite bands squaring off. Although I used a powerball on T.Rex in the selection committee, even I cannot with a straight face vote for T.Rex over the Stones. Even though I have loved the Stones' music for years, I might have been able to throw a meaningless sympathy vote to T.Rex until January when I saw one of the Stones' appearances at the United Center. Their set was so hot that afterwards it took several minutes to sink in that it was less than 10 degrees F outside when we walked back to the car. Of course, when I got back to the car and needed something in the CD player to keep me awake for the drive home, I put in The Slider. T.Rexstasy forever!"
--The One-Eyed Squirrel

"#1-The Rolling Stones. Even though I don't even like the Stones all that much, to me these seem like the tournament favorites (though not the prohibitive favorites: there are some high-octane 1's and 2's in this field). The secret is that they have great songs *and* longevity. When "Don't Stop" was getting airplay a few months ago, I thought, "well, this isn't all that great a song." But given how old these guys are and how long the band has been going, it's pretty amazing that the song wasn't total crap. Think Nolan Ryan around 1990."
--The Bruce

"There's got to be at least one person out there who thinks that (a.) Keith Richards might be great someday if he'd only learn to tune his guitar and (b.) "Bang a Gong" is a better rock and roll song than anything the Stones ever did. It looks like that person is me. I'll be the class contrarian and vote for T. Rex."
--The Bug Doctor

---

# 9 Devo--16 votes
# 8 The Cure--30 votes
Abstentions: 0
Oncoming Traffic: 1

Match Comments (Best only):
"The Cure, because Robert Smith helped to defeat Mega Streisand and because my roommate freshman year would turn off the lights, put on his headphones, and play Devo while he twitched around (one of the girls next door said it sounded like he was having a seizure). I spent a lot of my freshman year in the commons lounge."
--The Pentagon Player

"Devo. This was a tough call until I remembered just how glad I was to hear "Working in the Coal Mine" on the radio. And how sick I am of hearing "Friday I'm in Love" on the radio."
--The Vaccinator

"Devo, in a spite-laden vote. The guy who runs bar trivia on Monday nights has this obsession with the Cure and insists that everyone should be able to identify deep cuts from 1987 from ten seconds of the song, which of course loses my team points as we don't have anyone who knows anything by the Cure, whereas geezer-laden law/med student teams tear it up."
--GZ

"Hmm. The song that was a highlight of Beavis and Butthead, or the inevirable ROBERT SMITH, ROBERT SMITH reference in South Park? Well, Robert Smith saved the town, but the asshat at Conor O'Neills loves the Cure, so I'm going with Devo, who shall now be known as The Pride of Cincy"
--Dirty Midwest

"Devo: Ha, ha. Because they had an Idea that they ran into the ground, and as much as I like The Cure, Devo's attempts always made for more interesting, if not necessarily better, music."
--Blasmo

"Seems self-hating to vote against Devo...reminds me of sixth grade. I was walking in from recess and the toughest teacher (who was also the most respected) asked me to speak with him. I was petrified. He looked at me and in a very serious tone, said "Do you wear an upside down flower pot on your head?" I said no and was able to depart. Anyways, The Cure is the choice."
--Law and Gerbil: SDV

"The Smiths – I can, however, be fully convinced to put aside my dislike for the dark and depressed pose when it comes to voting against ABBA, who I cannot stand. Having Mama Mia in town was agony, between the ads and the fiancee asking to go. I told her she could go whenever she wanted, but she seemed to want to go with me, an odd choice given that my loathing of ABBA is well-known in our household. And besides, if I have to vote for any European band who sang in English without actually knowing the language, it’d be the Scorpions."
--The Wizard of Babson Park

---

Yesterday's Results from from the Great Lakes Regional, at Assembly Hall in
Bloomington, IN
# 5 ABBA--21 votes
#12 The Smiths--21 votes
Abstentions: 3
Oncoming Traffic: 2

OVERTIME: Commissioner Breaks Tie...The Smiths advances.
Reason 1: Dana Gould's stand-up bit about listening to his Morrissey tape.
Reason 2: It's who I voted for, if I chose ABBA, then it would be 22-20 them.
Reason 3: To annoy J-Kel.

Match Comments (Best only):
"You BASTARD! You whore, Barker!!! You're making my manic face off against my depression!!! Unfair! Unfair!! I cannot decide. You will pay for this."
--The Curator

"Craig, you have done Brigid a great injustice by forcing her to choose between these two bands in the first round. She will not be pleased. I however, will vote for the Smiths, because I blame ABBA's success for allowing Ace of Base and the Rednex to receive US airplay."
--Marist MU

"Pass. I hate to cop out like that, but in a battle between these two I'm cheering for injuries."
--RickT

"I stand corrected, as this matchup contains the WORST BAND EVER, i.e. ABBA. Obviously my vote goes to the Smiths."
--Deeez Nuuuts

"I'll defer to Mr. Gigundous Winamp Playlist on these.
ABBA songs on playlist: 0
A-Teens songs on playlist: 0
Songs from the Original Cast Recording of "Mamma Mia" on playlist: 0
Smiths songs on playlist: 4
Covers of Smiths songs on playlist: 2*
(check out the Snake River Conspiracy version of "How Soon is Now." Good stuff!)

The Smiths in a shutout!"
--Studio 176

"ABBA. I'm not going to vote for two whiny goth-ish bands in one day. And I've pretty much worn out my copy of ABBA Gold. Yes, I'm the world's biggest straight male ABBA fan--sue me."
--The Stepson of Troy

"ABBA. A few comments...

(1) Why is ABBA against a 12 seed? It should be against a 16 seed.
(2) The Smiths' music, as far as I know, can't be made into an entertaining experience in musical theater.
(3a) "Ring Ring" is a highlight, but "Mamma Mia!" "Chiquitita," "Head Over Heels," "On and On and On," "I Do, I Do, I Do, I Do, I Do," "Eagle," "Summer Night City," "Honey Honey," "Money Money Money" and "Does Your Mother Know?" aren't. Hmm... That's just wrong. Hell, I'd rather listen to "The Visitors" than "Ring Ring."
(3b) Thank me for not making that list longer.
(3c) In fact, "The Visitors" can be very appropriate with its strains of "HELP ME" when you're on the way to an NAQT SCT as a two-person team.
(4) Someone is going to vote for the Smiths just to annoy me.
(5) It's me. What did you expect?"
--Senor SwedishPants

"How did my teenage pals and I not realize that Mozz was gay? How did we not figure that out?? He did everything but wear a sign around his neck that said "I AM GAY." Sheesh. Anyway, I love ABBA, but I truly believe that between Mozz and Marr, the Smiths were the more influential band. Did you notice that two bands in today's matchup wrote songs about girlfriends in comas? The Smiths with "Girlfriend in a Coma" and Devo with "The Day My Baby Gave Me a Surprise." Wahoo!"
--Mrs. Gerbil #1

---

#13 Gladys Knight and the Pips--15 votes
# 4 Public Enemy--30 votes
Abstentions: 2
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"PE Fantastic concert at the Joe in '88 which I survived ONLY because I was raised on the mean streets of Farmington Hills. I still tear up recalling my favorite concert T ripping while playing backyard football...I don't want to talk about it anymore...sniff."
--The Mentor

"Gladys Knight is very good, but Public Enemy is A LOT better. Rolling Stone wrote in 1988 that "Don't Believe the Hype" had already become a new "Where's the Beef?" as catchphrases went...all of the listed songs, plus others like "She Watch Channel Zero?!" were like nothing else on the market during their heyday, and they still hold up great today. Chuck D might be the sharpest lyricist that American popular music has produced in the last 30 years."
--The Grandmaster of W. Mass. Funk

"Mr. H-L's dead-on right about Chuck D's lyrics, but where Public Enemy is truly mindblowing is in Terminator X's and the Bomb Squad's backing tracks. Layers of beautiful noise so dense Phil Spector couldn't wade through them. The power of the best hip-hop comes from the turntable, not the mic. Suckas to the side!"
--Gerbil #1

"Public Enemy. But to Mike H-L, Gladys Knight and the Pips have also had their influence on common usage. Supporting characters are sometimes called Pips, i.e., Scottie Pippen, Tony Kukoc, Dennis Rodman."
--BrickHouse

"PE, if just for that damn clock around Flava Flav's neck."
--JQSmooth

"Ow, ow, ow, ow. Touch decision! Public Enemy, because of higher historical influence factor, but did I mention ow?"
--The Goddess of Accounting

"Gladys Knight and the Pips: And for the record, I'm starting to get really pissed that the 60s bands are getting no love because of our demographic. We don't have enough people who were alive then or who listen to that kind of music for these bands to get the respect they deserve."
--The Crocheting Terrapin
(Commissioner's Note: Or they are just losing to other bands. Sometimes a loss is just a loss.)

---

Today's Matchups from the Heartland Regional, at Erwin Center in
Austin, TX

# 3 The Beastie Boys
vs.
#14 Boston

The Beastie Boys: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Rhymin & Stealin
Jimmy James
Sure Shot
So What'cha Want
Shake Your Rump
Sabotage
Intergalactic
Hey Ladies
Fight for Your Right
Slow Ride

Boston: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Feelin' Satisfied
Peace of Mind
More Than a Feeling
Don't Look Back
Amanda
Cool the Engines
It's Easy
Hitch a Ride
Man I'll Never Be
Rock and Roll Band

#11 ZZ Top
vs.
# 6 Green Day

ZZ Top: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Tush
Sharp Dressed Man
Pearl Necklace
Legs
Jesus Just Left Chicago
Heard It on the X
La Grange
Gimme All Your Lovin'
Cheap Sunglasses
Tube Snake Boogie

Green Day: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Waiting
Good Riddance (Time of Your Life)
Brain Stew
Warning
Basket Case
Longview
When I Come Around
Macy's Day Parade
J.A.R. (Jason Andrew Relva)
Only of You
She

---

Today's Matchups from the Heartland Regional, at United Spirit Arena
in Lubbock, TX

# 7 Chicago
vs.
#10 Frank Zappa and the Mothers of Invention

Chicago: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Hard to Say I'm Sorry
Baby, What a Big Surprise
Hard Habit to Break
If You Leave Me Now
Beginnings
Feelin' Stronger Every Day
(I've Been) Searchin' So Long
25 or 6 to 4
Wishing You Were Here
Does Anybody Really Know What Time It Is?

Frank Zappa and the Mothers of Invention: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Willie the Pimp
Who Are the Brain Police?
Valley Girl
Take Your Clothes Off When You Dance
Peaches en Regalia
My Guitar Wants to Kill Your Mama
Hungry Freaks, Daddy
Don't Eat the Yellow Snow
Dirty Love
Jewish Princess
Trouble Every Day

#15 Squirrel Nut Zippers
vs.
# 2 U2

Squirrel Nut Zippers: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Anything But Love
My Drag
Suits Are Picking up the Bill
Meant to Be
Blue Angel
Put a Lid on It
Hell
Low Down Man
Wash Jones
Trou Macacq

U2: Song Highlights from AMG/CDB/SMW/DMW
All I Want Is You
Bad
Beautiful Day
Desire
Elevation
I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For
I Will Follow
Mysterious Ways
New Year's Day
One
One Tree Hill
Please
Pride (In the Name of Love)
Stay (Faraway, So Close)
Stuck in a Moment You Can't Get Out Of
The Unforgettable Fire
Ultraviolet (Light My Way)
Until The End of the World
Walk On
Where The Streets Have No Name
With or Without You


That's all for today, until tomorrow,
I'm Craig Barker, Wing nut.

Thought for the Day: Like a Nolan Ryan Fastball
April 29, 2003

First things first:
Sorry gang, Tuesday, you know the drill...

---

The Barker 128-Band Tournament of Champions--Day 07
Vote by logging into the comments widget or emailing me by 8:00 pm EST WEDNESDAY. We'll tally and post the results then.

Fair Warning: Any attempts to subjugate voting by any means may result in a permanent disqualification of any and all guilty parties by the contest operators. So, if you had any plans of a devious or conspiratorial nature, you may want to rethink them or at least not make them so public. If you'd like to play by the rules, however, you're more than welcome to do so, we encourage democracy here.

OK, that is all. Thank you, and let's be careful out there.
--The Commissioner

---

Yesterday's Results from the Great Lakes Regional, at the Breslin Student Events Center in East Lansing, MI
# 3 The Temptations--38 votes
#14 The Replacements--09 votes
Abstentions: 0
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"I saw The Temps in eleventh grade downtown. It was one of the best concerts I have ever been to."
--The Scientist

"The Temptations - A nation was reintroduced to the music of the '60s through the Soundtrack from the Big Chill and "My Girl". Between that and Kevin Costner ending up on the cutting room floor, the movie becomes tolerable!"
--Law and Gerbil: SDV

"They were the soundtrack to my drunker teenage (and, um, well, my drunker pre-teen) years. I just can't go for anyone else."
--The Raging Lemur

"The Replacements: Well, the definition of "band" works better with them, even with the Temptations' astonishing breadth of style and command. I'm modifying my definition as we go here, which means I might have to vote against those I nominated, such as the Temptations. Besides, Paul snuck me into a concert when I was underage. What the hell else do you want? Oh yeah, this couplet: "The ones who love us best are the ones we've laid to rest/ Visit their graves at holidays, at best/ The ones who love us least, are the ones we'll die to please/ If it's any consolation, I don't begin to understand it." No comment made by Cobain or Vedder will ever equal that denunciation of our attempts to be loved by everyone."
--Blasmo

"The Temptations: There was a guy on the Dartmouth college bowl team who never could stop talking about the Replacements. There were lots of annoying bands he discussed, but it inevitably got back to the Replacements. I suffered through an entire trip to Ann Arbor and back with him and thus my thoughts about the Replacements are inextricably tied to him. I'm not a big Temptations fan, but they deserve to go on here..."
--The Dartmouth Hoosier

"I was hesitant to say Motown groups should be included in a "bands" contest, since I think the Temptations are vocalists rather than a band. As Craig's birthday present for me--Standing in the Shadows of Motown on DVD--makes abundantly clear, the music was the product of one band, the Funk Brothers. In deference to them, I'll vote for the Temptations."
--Cardinal

"The Temptations. Everyone should vote for the Temptations just to see if a shut out of the 'Mats reduces Craig to tears."
--The Brown Martyr of QB
(Commissioner's Note: You know, I am from Detroit, I like the Temps too!)

"I'll go for the Replacements too. In solidarity with Craig, even though he laughed at me when he found out how I hurt myself!"
--Studio 176
(Commissioner's Note: I did do my best not to, and I have checked to make sure you're OK)

"The Funk Brothers and the songwriting/production of Holland-Dozier-Holland were important ingredients...but how many Motown acts dumped HDH for an edgier style and remained at the same level? Norman Whitfield gave them some of the best material of their career after he politicized them. (Witness the last 5 songs listed here, plus "Psychedelic Shack" and "Smiling Faces Sometimes" among others.) If that weren't enough, the P-Funk guitar section played with them on "Shakey Ground", the last big hit they had before the slide into disco oblivion. The Tempts easily."
--The Grandmaster of W. Mass Funk

---

#11 Genesis--23 votes
# 6 The Mamas and the Papas--22 votes
Abstentions: 1
Oncoming Traffic: 1

Match Comments (Best only):
"Genesis. They may have been all over the place, but when they were on, they were on. And you didn't even include Abacab in the list of Genesis songs."
--JQSmooth

"This is a tough one. On one hand, Phil Collins robbed South Park of the best original song Oscar. On the other hand, I'll never get the image of Mama Cass choking to death on a chicken bone on SNL out of my mind. However, I think based solely on the video for Land of Confusion I will have to pick Genesis. I think somewhere back in Harrisburg there is a tape with that video and an episode from the short lived clamation series with Ron and Nancy Reagan where Ron confused the two phones in the bedroom and tried to order pizza but accidentally sent in the nuclear launch codes."
--Marist MU

"Genesis – Hopefully, people will focus less on the very end and more on the great pop they put out in the ‘80s, not to mention their great videos (“Land of Confusion” especially). Then there’s the whole Peter Gabriel era, too, which is almost like a completely different band. And there’s Phil Collins’ love of horns."
--The Wizard of Babson Park

"Genesis - I've loved the middle three phases of Genesis' career - the bombastic prog rock period, the sophisticated adult pop period and even the shameless commercial whore period."
--The One-Eyed Squirrel

"The Mamas and The Papas - When I was a graduate student at Delaware, I lived right next to the field where the UD marching band practiced "Something Happened On The Way To Heaven"."
--The Pentagon Player

"The Mamas and the Papas. In their primes both bands were great. However, all The Mamas and Papas had was prime since they dissolved so fast. However, the fact that later Genesis suffered from Peter Cetera Syndrome* is still fresh in my mind.

[* Peter Cetera Syndrome: that point in a band's career where the lead singer starts a solo career while still in the band and you can never again tell the difference between group material and solo stuff. In many cases both material is rather pedestrian. Chicago/Cetera and Genesis/Collins are the most notable violators.]
--RickT

---

Yesterday's Results from the Great Lakes Regional, at Williams Arena in Minneapolis, MN

# 7 INXS--23 votes
#10 The Ben Folds Five--23 votes
Abstentions: 0
Oncoming Traffic: 0
OVERTIME: Commissioner Breaks Tie...INXS advances.
Reason 1: I love "Never Tear Us Apart." That's all I need here, no offense to Major Apathy and General Boredom.

Match Comments (Best only):
"I never paid much attention to either, but from what little I ever did, and despite the fact that Ben's a fellow keyboardist-singer-songwriter (and a very good one), I'd much rather
listen to INXS."
--The Bug Doctor

"Ben Folds Five, with apologies to poor dead Michael Hutchence"
--Goddess of Accounting

"INXS because of Mediate and because Ben Folds solo work is equal to or better than him with other two people who make of the Five."
--The Curator

"INXS--This was a close one, too, but I was an '80s girl, so I'll go with the '80s band."
--Mrs. Gerbil #1

"Ben Folds Five, in my easiest decision of the tournament."
--GZ

"Ben Folds Five. INXS a 7 seed? Didn't know there were so many fans of autoerotic asphyxiation."
--Gerbil #1

"INXS. I like BFF, but damn, a contender for greatest band ever? I don't think INXS is either, but they certainly have a stronger case (which rests mostly on "Never Tear Us Apart.")"
--Spartan Steve

"INXS. Looking back, Hutchence may well have done them a big favor: they were fastly approaching "fade away" ("Elegantly Wasted" anyone?), but they deserve a vote on the strength of "Don't Change" all by itself."
--VwlssWndr

---

#15 Martha and the Vandellas--07 votes
# 2 The Police--39 votes
Abstentions: 1
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"Martha and the Vandellas. They may actually be more underrated in this tournament than ABBA (which should be a one seed, Barker, and you know it), which is rather unfortunate."
--Senor NotOnYourLifePants

"Gotta go with Sting and the boys. The Vandellas had some great songs, but the Police churned out one instant classic after another, with no help from Berry Gordy or his hit machine."
--The Answer Guy

"Police, though it's interesting to note what would likely have happened had they not broken up. You guessed it, Genesis II."
--The Good Doctor

---

Today's Matchups from the Heartland Regional, at Allen Fieldhouse in Lawrence, KS

# 1 The Rolling Stones
vs.
#16 T.Rex

The Rolling Stones: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Street Fighting Man
Gimme Shelter
(I Can't Get No) Satisfaction
Jumpin' Jack Flash
You Can't Always Get What You Want
Under My Thumb
Sympathy for the Devil
Get Off of My Cloud
Wild Horses
Ruby Tuesday
Paint It, Black
Start Me Up
Miss You
Angie
Mixed Emotions

T.Rex: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Telegram Sam
Ride a White Swan
Mambo Sun
Jeepster
Cosmic Dancer
Children of the Revolution
Bang a Gong (Get It On)
20th Century Boy
Metal Guru
Life's a Gas

# 9 Devo
vs.
# 8 The Cure

Devo: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Whip It
Mongoloid
Jocko Homo
Girl U Want
Freedom of Choice
Beautiful World
(I Can't Get No) Satisfaction
Day My Baby Gave Me a Surprise
Secret Agent Man
Working in the Coal Mine

The Cure: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Boys Don't Cry
A Forest
Let's Go to Bed
The Walk
The Lovecats
Close to Me
Why Can't I Be You?
Just Like Heaven
Lullaby
Lovesong
Never Enough
Friday I'm in Love
Mint Car
Wrong Number

---

Today's Matchups from the Heartland Regional, at Gallagher-Iba Arena in Stillwater, OK

# 5 ABBA
vs.
#12 The Smiths

ABBA: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Name of the Game
Waterloo
Take a Chance on Me
Fernando
Dancing Queen
S.O.S.
Knowing Me, Knowing You
Winner Takes It All
Super Trouper
Ring Ring

The Smiths: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Hand in Glove
There Is a Light That Never Goes Out
Boy With the Thorn in His Side
Panic
William, It Was Really Nothing
This Charming Man
Reel Around the Fountain
Please Please Please Let Me Get What I Want
How Soon Is Now?
Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now
Girlfriend in a Coma

#13 Gladys Knight and the Pips
vs.
# 4 Public Enemy

Gladys Knight and the Pips: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Every Beat of My Heart
Letter Full of Tears
Giving Up
I Heard It Through the Grapevine
If I Were Your Woman
Friendship Train
I Don't Want to Do Wrong
Daddy Could Swear, I Declare
Neither One of Us (Wants to Be the First...
Midnight Train to Georgia
I've Got to Use My Imagination
The Best Thing That Ever Happened to Me
I Feel a Song (In My Heart)
On and On
The Way We Were
Save the Overtime (For Me)
Hero (Wind Beneath My Wings)
Love Overboard

Public Enemy: Song Highlights from AMG:
Welcome to the Terrordome
911 Is a Joke
Bring the Noise
Don't Believe the Hype
Give It Up
Shut Em Down
Fight the Power
By the Time I Get to Arizona
Night of the Living Baseheads
Nighttrain
Bring Tha Noise
He Got Game

That's all for today, until tomorrow,
I'm Craig Barker, over and out.

Thought for the Day: Welcome back my friends to the show that never ends...
April 28, 2003

First things first:
Draft Day 2003: First Impression, Part 2 by Emerson, Lake, and Palmer

From: TOPFIVE.COM'S LITTLE FIVERS -- SPORTS
April 28, 2003

The Top 6 Surprises at the NFL Draft

04> While in New York, Al Davis sues Reverend Al Sharpton for "infringing upon his image," citing his first name, penchant for track suits, and megalomania.

02> Bengals continue their tradition of excellence by accidentally selecting Carson Daly with the first overall pick.

and the Number 1 Surprise at the NFL Draft...
01> The Jets hire the Iraqi Information Minister, Muhammed Saeed al-Sahaf, to extol the virtues of their top pick. Jet fans boo anyway.

[ Copyright 2003 by Chris White ]
[ http://www.topfive.com ]

Selected from 18 submissions from 5 contributors.
Today's Top 5 List authors are:
------------------------------------------------------------------
Craig D. Barker, Livonia, MI -- 1, 2, 4 (Hat trick!)

---

John Clayton's Observations from a draft weekend in New York
Best line in the whole thing:
A total of 32 teams selected 262 players in 15 hours and one minute. That's 3:43 a selection. That's pretty amazing when you consider the Raiders took the entire 30 minutes to make their two selections at the end of the first round. The Rams called the Raiders during the 30 minutes and offered them a seventh-rounder just to make the pick.

So, apparently Mike Martz does not have the patience of his Las Vegas criminalist doppelganger.

---

Detroit Lions Draft

I have been told by sources that we paid da cost to get da Boss, but he's a steal at that slot.
Continuing with the NFL brothers theme, we also snagged Torry Holt's brother while Stockar's brother went to the Iggles.

---

This just in, Minnesota has gotten its card to the table and with the seventh pick in the 2003 NFL Draft selects Fran Tarkenton, quarterback, University of Georgia.

Personally, I think that all Drafts should operate on the "first guy to get the card to the table gets their pick" theory. You bunch teams in groups of four, and have eight first round free for alls. THAT would pick up the pace of this draft, and you could probably get your players some off season work and extra bonuses.

"And look at Vick break the tackles of the Colts secondary, too bad the Falcons traded this pick to Buffalo for Peerless Price."

---

Texans draft former Michigan QB
From The Good Doctor and Stepson of Troy:
Idea: At some point, some upcoming Sunday, we meet up in Columbus and take in a Clippers game. Then we get seats on the third base side, and wait. Upon the first screwup by Drew Henson we start chanting "HOUS-TON TEX-ANS [clap clap clap-clap-clap] HOUS-TON TEX-ANS [clap clap clap-clap-clap]."

I will be attending the game in my #7 Michigan home football jersey, prompting the Head Keenan to retort:
"If Craig is willing to wear a Michigan jersey in Columbus, I'll bring the First Aid kit."

---

Cappuccino Friar Moves Along Sainthood Path
Sources say he was very figidety.

Eustachy: Attending Missouri party was 'poor judgment'
No Larry, getting caught is what made it poor judgement. But can someone explain to me how KU girls are hotter than K-State gals? (Apparently I have been told by reliable sources that the calendars will bear Larry out on this one.)

Gammons: Tough young Tiger
Bondermania watch!

First American on EPL's team of year
Aww yeah, Yankee (American, not evil New Yorker) is the English hizzouse!

Today's highlights:

From AP US History:
How to write a good AP U.S. History essay.

From International Relations:
Still working the whole finishing the simulation thing.

Random Simpsons Quote:
Theme song: "Some Folk'll Never Eat a Skunk, but then again, some folk'll, like Cletus the Slack-Jawed Yokel."

Today's Phrase that Can Never Lead to Any Good:
Publishing Giant, 'Hee Haw' Force Gaylord Dies

"In 1999, the Columbia Journalism Review called The Oklahoman "The Worst Newspaper in America," faulting the paper for among other things, bending over backwards to print news favorable to Gaylord's business ventures, writing stories that supported political causes backed by Gaylord, hiring few minorities and offering prayers on the front page."

Today's Installment of "I am shocked, Louie, just quite simply shocked!"
Czar's Freakshow Helps Fight Russian Alcoholism

---

The Barker 128-Band Tournament of Champions--Day 06

Vote by logging into the comments widget or emailing me by 10:00 pm EST TUESDAY. We'll tally and post the results then.

OK, that is all. Thank you, and let's be careful out there.
--The Commissioner

---

Yesterday's Results from the Great Lakes Regional, at Welsh-Ryan Arena in Evanston, IL
# 1 R.E.M.--43 votes
#16 Electric Light Orchestra--8 votes
Abstentions: 1
Oncoming Traffic: 1

Match Comments (Best only):
"You must be joking. This is a total no-brainer. Aside from the lovely possibilities for long-distance-driving sing-alongs (even for one who, like me, sings pop like they're in the church choir), R.E.M. is the Official Band of high-school debate teams everywhere. You don't believe me? It's simple: Michael's judging a round, is presented with an ambitious affirmative plan that'll solve all the planet's ills, but votes negative. All brilliantly summed up as "You offer me alternatives, you offer me solutions, and I decline... It's the end of the world as we know it... And I feel fine." Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I AM a total geek. Thank you for asking. Oh, yes, and R.E.M. performed on Sesame Street. Top that!"
--AngloExPat

"R.E.M. (Tangent: Want to read an interesting semi-satirical, semi-God-knows-what essay, try "The Frequency" by Paul Limbert Allman, from a semi-recent Harper's, about the Dan Rather incident. [Then listen to "What's the Frequency, Kenneth"])."
--The Mathematical Bulldogg

"R.E.M.: I have to admit, ELO's "Don't Bring Me Down" can be addictive, but it's in that "I can't get that damn song unstuck out of my head" kind of way, making this that much easier."
--The Cable Guy

"R.E.M.: I want to vote for ELO, really, out of protest for Michael Stipe turning into a parody of himself, but then I remember Jeff Lynne's role in the soundtrack for Xanadu."
--The Vaccinator

"ELO. Yes, I think "Xanadu" is good thing. Also remember that the surviving Beatles chose Jeff Lynne to produce their "new" 1995 songs."
--The Brick House

"R.E.M. Next!"
--Studio 176 (We wish a speedy recovery to the 404's favorite DDR player.)

"I didn't think I could make an argument for ELO, but then Vacca brought up Xanadu. Everybody should see this movie, if only to see just how much entertainment we owe to special effects advances of the last 25 years, and to see Gene Kelly (Pitt grad!) roller skate. That said, I still can't make an argument for ELO, and if I can't find a reason to vote against R.E.M., this matchup's gonna get ugly. R.E.M."
--The Stepson of Troy

---

# 9 Stevie Ray Vaughn and Double Trouble--20 votes
# 8 The B-52s--27 votes
Abstentions: 4
Oncoming Traffic: 2

Match Comments (Best only):
"SRV - Man, this isn't even close. The B-52s pop kitsch aged poorly, while serious axework never dulls. Anyone who can improve on Stevie ("Superstition") and go toe to toe with Jimi ("Little Wing") can't be denied. The B-52s strike me as being the Bizarro World version of REM. I'm trying to picture Michael Stipe with Fred's voice and that one woman's beehive."
--The Wizard of Babson Park

"B-52's. I see where you're going with the next matchup, and that's just evil, dude."
--JQSmooth
(Commissioner's Note: What are you talking about, if the B-52s win they play...sh*t.)

"Gotta go with the B-52's sure they're campy, and in that weird, campy section of rock, but I always thought they were great. And who doesn't sing along with 'Tin Roof- Rusted.' every time?"
--The Curator

"Anyone who cut up his fingers playing guitar and then superglued the cuts back together so he could play some more deserves my vote."
--Mrs. Gerbil #1

"SRV and DT. Only two musicians have left me staring at the stereo with my jaw dropped wide open. SRV is one of them."
--RickT.

"B-52's, because anything's funnier when you say it like Fred Schneider (try it with "Ambrose Bierce" and you'll giggle uncontrollably for 20 minutes), and because we need to purge these solo artists masquerading as bands to sneak them into the tournament. Yes, I'm still looking at you Mr. Rogers Nelson."
--The Stepson of Troy

---

Yesterday's Results from from the Great Lakes Regional, at Assembly Hall in
Bloomington, IN
# 5 Radiohead--23 votes
#12 Rush--23 votes
Abstentions: 5
Oncoming Traffic: 2
OVERTIME: Commissioner Breaks Tie...
Reason 1: I checked my phone: Ringtones for Radiohead-1 (High and Dry), Ringtones for Rush (1-The Drumfill from Tom Sawyer.) Damn, no help there.
Reason 2: When in doubt, buy American. Damn, no help there.
Reason 3: Go with the band that made less confusing concept albums. Son of a bitch!
Reason 4: [rummages around in pocket]...Heads Radiohead...call it in the air...Tails it is.Rush advances.

Match Comments (Best only):
"Rush v. Radiohead. I hate the seeding committee. I really hate the seeding committee. First I find out that one of TMBG or Cake HAS to advance, now I find out that one of Rush or Radiohead has to go.

OK, imagine if I were a rock critic. If I admitted I were going to choose Rush over Radiohead all the other critics would avoid eye contact with me at all the Rock Critics Conventions and I wouldn't get invited to any of the cool afterparties, even after I explain that I grew up playing drums in New England in the 80s.

But I'm not a rock critic. Rush it is."
--The Answer Guy

" Rush - Today's Tom Sawyer not only would get high on you, but he'd make a great corporate manager, given his ability to get others to paint his fences."
--The Virginian

"And while I'm on an R.E.M. theme, do you remember that quizbowl question that stated it had been rumored that Michael Stipe and Thom York dated at some point? What the hell was that all about?"
--The Raging Lemur

"Rush is a guilty pleasure. Geddy et. al. get my vote."
--The Bug Doctor

"I wonder what percentage of votes are really just anti-votes against the other band? Like this vote for Radiohead. Down with Rush."
--Spartan Steve
(Commissioner's Note: I suspect this game was Spite Central.)

---

#13 No Doubt--15 votes
# 4 Parliament-Funkadelic--34 votes
Abstentions: 0
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"P-Funk. Consider that there's a Parliament album named after a chemical element. Now realize that they chose to name it not after one of those ordinary elements, gold, silver, copper. No, they went with OSMIUM, which is incredibly dense, has its own cachet of obscurity combined with coolness, and when combined with oxygen, toxic to the unwary. The parallel is clear. They can even locate the funk on the periodic table. Game, set, match, thanks for playing, No Doubt. Here's some lovely parting gifts."
--The Good Doctor

"Parlaiment Funkadelic over No Doubt--PCU again comes into the picture. Parliament Funkadelic gets the votes just because their appearance in that film was great!"
--The Dartmouth Hoosier

"Parliament. God, Gwen Stefani. Did you see that shit at the Superbowl this year? Cause I did, and it wasn't pretty."
--The Goddess of Accounting

"Well, I really like No Doubt, but I feel obligated to vote for Parliament-Funkadelic for the Bootsy Collins to my Ken Daneyko. I think Mme. Le Gougne was at work again with No Doubt being only one seed higher than the Monkees, and I really wouldn't like to see either of these entries lose this early, but I think I have to go with P-Funk. Oh, now would be a good time to curse Clippy wouldn't it? Oh, I don't have the energy or the heart. Poor sprite takes more than enough verbal abuse."
--Senor CornellPants

"Sam votes: Funkadelic for the sole reason that No Doubt holds a high rank with the most overrated "artists" in the world along with The White Stripes and 50 Cent."
--Sam the IV

"P-Funk -- Tell me this will the biggest blow out so far."
--Blasmo

"P-Funk. Ga ga goo ga. Ga ga goo ga. Ga ga goo ga ga. Please. Do you even need to ask me for my choice here?

Also, what on Earth is up with those AMG song highlights for P-Funk? I count several tracks from George's most recent studio album (T.A.P.O.A.F.O.M., which was mostly lackluster); several tracks from a good but underexposed album (Urban Dancefloor Guerillas); two tracks from a mostly lackluster Bootsy album (What's Bootsy Doin'?); a song from a Bootsy-related side project; two obscure Walter "Junie" Morrison solo tracks; an even more obscure Jerome "Bigfoot" Brailey solo track; and a just-as-obscure track from Mutiny, a spinoff group. The only song from a core album that's listed here is..."Never Gonna Tell It"? Yeesh. That was a nice, offbeat change of pace, but the AMG people could really have done a lot better.

(I had to actually conduct an AMG search for them to figure out where the hell they may have come from. Considering how much I like P-Funk, that should give you some idea just how low their profiles are.)"
--The Grandmaster of W. Mass. Funk

"No Doubt...just to upset Hoey-Lukakis!"
--Law and Gerbil: SDV

"P-Funk- with a shout-out to the Roswell Rayguns."
--The Pride of Flinttown

"P-Funk. About the only thing going for No Doubt in my book is that new single that starts out like the "Town Theme" from every Nintendo RPG made in the 1980's."
--VwlssWndr

---

Today's Matchups from the Great Lakes Regional, at the Breslin Student Events Center in East Lansing, MI

# 3 The Temptations
vs.
#14 The Replacements

The Temptations: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
The Way You Do the Things You Do
My Girl
Since I Lost My Baby
Don't Look Back
Get Ready
Ain't Too Proud to Beg
(I Know) I'm Losing You
All I Need
You're My Everything
Angel Doll
I Wish It Would Rain
Cloud Nine
I Can't Get Next to You
Ball of Confusion (That's What the World...
Just My Imagination (Running Away With Me)
Papa Was a Rolling Stone

The Replacements: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
I Will Dare
Left of the Dial
Kiss Me on the Bus
Bastards of Young
Here Comes a Regular
Skyway
Alex Chilton
The Ledge
Can't Hardly Wait
I'll Be You
Achin' to Be
Talent Show
Anywhere's Better Than Here
Merry-Go-Round
Sadly Beautiful
Within Your Reach

#11 Genesis
vs.
# 6 The Mamas and the Papas

Genesis: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Lamb Lies Down on Broadway
I Know What I Like (In Your Wardrobe)
Dancing With the Moonlit Knight
Carpet Crawlers
That's All
Watcher of the Skies
Supper's Ready
Misunderstanding
Turn It on Again
No Reply at All
Invisible Touch
Land of Confusion
I Can't Dance
Hold on My Heart
No Son of Mine
In Too Deep
Congo
Jesus He Knows Me

The Mamas and the Papas: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
I Saw Her Again
Go Where You Wanna Go
Dream a Little Dream of Me
Creeque Alley
Dedicated to the One I Love
Monday, Monday
California Dreamin'
Trip, Stumble and Fall
Safe in My Garden
Look Through My Window

---

Today's Matchups from the Great Lakes Regional, at Williams Arena in Minneapolis, MN

# 7 INXS
vs.
#10 Ben Folds Five

INXS: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Need You Tonight/Mediate
What You Need
Disappear
Baby Don't Cry
Elegantly Wasted
Mystify
Suicide Blonde
Never Tear Us Apart
Beautiful Girl
Listen Like Theives
New Sensation
Original Sin
The Devil Inside

Ben Folds Five: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Rockin' the Suburbs
Underground
Song for the Dumped
Brick
The Battle of Who Could Care Less
One Angry Dwarf and 200 Solemn Faces
Julianne
Army
Regrets
Where's Summer B?
Philosophy

#15 Martha and the Vandellas
vs.
# 2 The Police

Martha and the Vandellas: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Love Like Yours (Don't Come Knocking Everyday)
Love (Makes Me Do Foolish Things)
In My Lonely Room
I'm Ready for Love
Quicksand
Nowhere to Run
Jimmy Mack
Dancing in the Street
Come and Get These Memories
(Love Is Like A) Heat Wave

The Police: Song Highlights from AMG:
Roxanne
Can't Stand Losing You
Message in a Bottle
Walking on the Moon
Don't Stand So Close to Me
De Do Do Do, De da da Da
Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic
Invisible Sun
Spirits in the Material World
Every Breath You Take
King of Pain
Wrapped Around Your Finger

That's all for today, until tomorrow,
I'm Craig Barker, still recovering from information overload.

Thought for the Day: All good things...Multi-layered
April 25, 2003

First things first:
Nothing really good out there. Have a good weekend and enjoy the ten hour information coma that is the NFL Draft!

Today's highlights:
From World History:
From AP US History:
From International Relations:
We're on vacation! (But that will end on Monday, but hey, six week sprint!)

Random Simpsons Quote:
Homer Simpson: "The other day I was so desperate for a beer, I snuck into the football stadium and ate the dirt under the bleachers."

---

The Barker 128-Band Tournament of Champions--Day 05
Vote by logging into the comments widget or emailing me by 8:00 pm EST MONDAY. We'll tally and post the results then.

OK, that is all. Thank you, and let's be careful out there.
--The Commissioner

---

Yesterday's Results from the Mid-Atlantic Regional, at the Smith Center in Chapel Hill, NC
# 3 Duran Duran--22 votes
#14 The Monkees--20 votes
Abstentions: 2
Oncoming Traffic: 2

Match Comments (Best only):
"Duran Duran. Guess I shouldn't tell 'em that I like..."
--The Mathematical Bulldogg

"Duran Duran. Even their mediocre '90s stuff produced a memorable moment with the DDR bonus at TRASHionals."
--JQSmooth

"Duran Duran - If not for their original version of "Ordinary World", what other horribly re-mixed song would have been used for Dave Murphy's Dance Dance Revolution bonus? "
--The Virginian

"Have you ever seen the "Girls on Film" video? Let's see the band that put out that video versus the band that runs around chasing each other..."
--The Scientist

"How did Duran Duran get to be a #3 seed? Because their handlers made cool-looking videos for them to star in?? Because of their creative use of hair dye and Mummy's blouses??? Come on, half the people in the Monkees didn't even bother to go to the recording studio, and they were STILL a better band. I mean it, listen to "Valleri." And Mike Nesmith actually wrote one or two good songs, which puts him ahead of Duran, the Powerstation, and whatever that thing was that LeBon and the keyboard player were in. Arcadia, yeah. If Duran Duran are in this thing, I can't believe Kajagoogoo didn't make the cut. After all, they had such interesting haircuts."
--Mrs. Gerbil #1

"Duran² (which was neither Duran nor Duran--discuss)"
--The Cable Guy (nee The Michigan Paladin)

"Let me get this straight. New Order, Massive Attack, Husker Du, De La Soul, the Isley Brothers, and the Flaming Lips are out and a fricking band created for a television show is in?

Oh, don't get me wrong, I'm voting for the Monkees. But that's only because a Monkees/Sex Pistols matchup would be highly amusing, and I have no use whatsoever for Duran Duran. Plus we did write an excellent NC-17 sendup of "I'm a Believer" called "She Was A Screamer" sophomore year of college. Good times."
--Studio 176

"Duran Duran: I enjoyed watching "The Monkees" reruns as a kid. Duran Duran is named for a sex-crazed villain from a campy sci-fi movie. They both make good arguments, but advantage, Simon Le Bon."
--The Vaccinator

"Duran Duran, as if there were any doubt where my vote was going in this first matchup. 1) Duran Duran briefly split into both Arcadia and The Power Station; The Monkees have permanently split into The Monkees and Mike Nesmith. 2) Nik Rhodes' pink hair trumps Nesmith's knit cap. 3) Duran Duran never took flak about not playing their own instruments."
--VwlssWndr

---

#11 Huey Lewis and the News--21 votes
# 6 The Sex Pistols--21 votes
Abstentions: 3
Oncoming Traffic: 1
OVERTIME: Commissioner Breaks Tie...The Sex Pistols Advance.
Reason 1: The Pride of Flinttown said it better than I ever could:
"You can't fake on anyone who starts a song with 'I am the Anti-Christ.'"
Reason 2: I had a great class on Britain since 1945, so I actually understand the deeper socio-political meanings of "Anarchy in the UK."
Reason 3: "Power of Love" is good, but drunken singalongs with Johnny Rotten are better.

Match Comments (Best only):
"Huey Lewis (Power of Love--what more do I need to say?)"
--Dr. Pike, Medicine Woman to Be

"The Sex Pistols: Are you f*****g kidding me? I mean this. If they lose, I quit this thing. The Sex Pistols deserve to sit out the first rounds, just as the Beatles and the Stones, because they're that important. Huey Lewis? Anyone who votes for them deserves to get his/her a** kicked all the way to Ann Arbor. I don't care which you enjoy more in the car. To say that Huey Lewis ever did anything meaningful for rock and roll is to notify the world of your lack of rock and roll appreciation. The Sex Pistols left more things rock in the toilet than Huey Lewis could ever dream of conceiving. And the bridge for "God Save the Queen" is one of the most loudly beautiful moments in twentieth century art."
--Blasmo

"Huey on a technicality; HL&TN were actually a band, as opposed to the Sex Pistols, which were a publicity stunt. An influential publicity stunt, to be sure, but let's face it -- they were the Monkees of punk. Besides, Huey and the boys were terrific entertainers, something that many of us rock snobs often forget to take into account. :-)"
--The Bug Doctor

"The Sex Pistols - Didn't Matthew Brock listen to Huey Lewis and the News when he went through his punk phase on NewsRadio?"
(Commissioner's Note: Nope, Glen Campbell, Winger, and Stryper.)

"Pistols. Here are some additional Pistol-related things I'd rather listen to than anything from the works of Huey Lewis:

*The French cafe version of "Anarchy in the UK" on the Swindle soundtrack
*the disco medley from the same soundtrack
*the horrible live recordings of Sid's short-lived solo act
*Mel C's cover of "Anarchy", which opens "I am an Anti-Christ/I am the Sporty Spice"
...must I go on?"
--Gerbil #1

"Huey Lewis and the News. This is not because some of EC's early work was done with what would eventually be the News. I really do like them."
--The Goddess of Accounting

"Matchup 2: I was going to make the following argument in defense of Styx but the News will work just as well. Did they change the face of RNR? No. Are they the best musicians or the best songwriters? No. They came and went and had no followers, but they left a lot of fun, singable songs, some of the best of their era. The world needs bands like Huey Lewis and the News. Meanwhile, fascinating album, changed the face...blah, blah, blah...they weren't THAT great. Plus, I can a draw a musical evolution chart that starts with The Sex Pistols and leaves us with Hoobastank. Thanks a lot, guys."
--Spartan Steve

---

Yesterday's Results from the Mid-Atlantic Regional, at Cameron Student Events Center in Durham, NC

# 7 The Bee Gees--17 votes
#10 The Smashing Pumpkins--25 votes
Abstentions: 2
Oncoming Traffic: 2

Match Comments (Best only):
"Like the Sex Pistols, I think the Smashing Pumpkins are a tad over-rated. Just my two cents.

As far as the Brothers Gibb, I was on a flight to Las Vegas two years ago when I started listening to the Bee Gees Greatest Hits live album on the airline headphones. I didn't want to turn it off. For an hour I was tapping my toes and snapping my fingers, enjoying song after song. Sometimes, it isn't just the lyrics or the message in the music that makes a band good, it's whether you just enjoy it, period. Robin, Maurice and Barry fit that category."
--A Voice of America

"The Bee Gees. You forgot to list "New York Mining Disaster 1941". Remember this exchange? "Billy Corgan, Smashing Pumpkins." "Homer Simpson, smiling politely." "
--The BrickHouse

"Bee Gees--don't get me started on a cultural history rant about how disco has been much maligned because it was the music of homosexual and black (among other) cultures that were coming together in the '70s as part of an alternate, cosmopolitan value system that challenged the hegemony of middle America blah blah blah..."
--The Stepson of Troy

---

#15 J. Geils Band--6 votes
# 2 Queen--37 votes
Abstentions: 3
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"Queen, rather easily, although I'm shocked to see that omitted from the list of their song highlights is the version of Bach's Mass in B Minor with lyrics by F. Mercury."
--Senor OrangePants

"How could AMG leave out the soundtrack to Flash Gordon? FLASH - AAAAAa-AAAAAAHHHHH Defender of
the Universe"
--Jersey Gerbil

"Queen is the far superior band. And they are going win, I have no doubt and no quarrel with that. However, I find it to be a moral imperative to vote for a band that once employed a 'milk wrangler.' J. Geils Band gets the nod."
--The Curator

"Queen - A vote for the band that wrote the ultimate championship song. 4 State titles and I remember them all every time that song comes on."
--The English Monkey

"How is this even a matchup? Queen in a romp. Please. Would you trust J. Geils to do the entire soundtrack to 2 movies? Hell, I wouldn't have let them do the one for Flash Gordon, and that's one of the cheesiest movies ever made."
--Marist MU

"J. Geils Band. Yes, Queen's going to win. Yes, Queen deserves to win. Handily. But I'm from Worcester. If I don't represent for J. Geils, they'd surely get a bigger drubbing than Cake. And that wouldn't be right."
--The Answer Guy

---

Today's Matchups from the Great Lakes Regional, at Welsh-Ryan Arena in Evanston, IL

# 1 R.E.M.
vs.
#16 Electric Light Orchestra

R.E.M.: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
So. Central Rain (I'm Sorry)
(Don't Go Back to) Rockville
Losing My Religion
Radio Free Europe
Fall on Me
Driver 8
The One I Love
It's the End of the World as We Know It (And I Feel Fine)
Man on the Moon
Everybody Hurts
Country Feedback
Imitation of Life
At My Most Beautiful
Strange Currencies
Electrolite
Daysleeper
The Great Beyond

Electric Light Orchestra: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Roll Over Beethoven
Sweet Talkin' Woman
Mr. Blue Sky
Livin' Thing
Strange Magic
Evil Woman
Can't Get It Out of My Head
Don't Bring Me Down
Four Little Diamonds
Rock & Roll Is King

# 9 Stevie Ray Vaughn and Double Trouble
vs.
# 8 The B-52s

Stevie Ray Vaughn and Double Trouble: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Tightrope
Look at Little Sister
Couldn't Stand the Weather
Crossfire
Cold Shot
Texas Flood
Love Struck Baby
Pride and Joy
Tin Pan Alley (AKA Roughest Place in Town)
Wall of Denial
Superstition
Little Wing

The B-52s: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Love Shack
Rock Lobster
Dance This Mess Around
Channel Z
Roam
Private Idaho
Summer of Love
Give Me Back My Man
Strobe Light
Bushfire
Mesopotamia

---

Today's Matchups from the Great Lakes Regional, at Assembly Hall in
Bloomington, IN

# 5 Radiohead
vs.
#12 Rush

Radiohead: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Lucky
Creep
Paranoid Android
Karma Police
National Anthem
Everything in Its Right Place
Street Spirit [Fade Out]
Just
High and Dry
Fake Plastic Trees

Rush: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
YYZ
Freewill
Distant Early Warning
Closer to the Heart
New World Man
Spirit of Radio
Red Barchetta
Limelight
Tom Sawyer
2112 Overture

#13 No Doubt
vs.
# 4 Parliament-Funkadelic

No Doubt: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Spiderwebs
Just a Girl
Don't Speak
Simple Kind of Life
Excuse Me Mr.
Sunday Morning
Bathwater
Trapped in a Box
Hella Good
Hey Baby
Underneath It All

Parliament-Funkadelic: Song Highlights from AMG:
If Anybody Gets Funked Up(It's Gonna Be You)
Funky Kind (Gonna Knock It Down)
Party On Plastic (What's Bootsy Doin'?)
Leakin'
Love Has Taken Me Over
Breakout
Instant Replay
One Of Those Summers
Pumpin' It Up
Misunderstood
Freak To Freak
Never Gonna Tell It
Rappin' About Rappin' (Uh-Uh-Uh)
Lump
Funk 'N' Bop

That's all for today, until tomorrow,
I'm Craig Barker, commenced.

Thought for the Day: Cardinal's Birthday
April 24, 2003

First things first:
A happy demarcation of his first quarter-century on Earth to my boy Dave W. The world is a better place for your being here my friend. Here's to an even better next two and a half decades!

ESPN's Page2 is now on their villains kick. Simmons, you're an ass for picking Laimbeer. You just didn't like that he killed the Celtics. Cope with it.

My sports villain...
Jim Tressel: Nope, helped us win TRASHionals.
John Cooper: Wait, he should have been on my sports heroes list.
Jean-Sebastien Giguere: Nah, Wings beat themselves.
Barry Sanders: Could have left on better terms, but you know, whatever.
Kordell Stewart and Michael Westbrook: I think I should hate them for some reason, but for the life of me, I can't remember what it is.
Ed Martin: He's dead, so that kind of hatred is a tough sell.
Tom Izzo: Not villainous, and how can you hate a guy when he's just good at what he does, even if he does work for your enemy? You don't have to like him, but you don't respect a villain.
Kevin McHale: No, that would just be stooping to their level.
Michael Jordan: Well, see, most of you just don't remember that he is personally responsible for the demise of the Bad Boys. Hated him them, still hate him now.
Nikolai Borschevsky, The 1994 San Jose Sharks, Marty Broduer, Paul Coffey...: Nope, but we're getting close...Something, out of the 1996 Western Conference Finals...

The Colorado Avalanche?
BINGO!

It's not quite the same high intensity hatred as it was circa 1997 during Fight Night at the Joe and Darren McCarty going 4th Infantry Division on Claude Lemieux, but I still really just don't like them. When they went down to the Wild the other night, I was happy, very schadenfreude happy, for the simple reason that if we weren't going to win the Cup this year, neither were they.

Mario's top lap 225.4 mph before crash
Dad, quick, get in the car! Drive it real fast. Flip it over! Land on your wheels. DAMN!

Look kids, light at the end of the tunnel!

Balanced effort helps Pistons overcome Magic
Do you think on Monday JoeD walked over to a file cabinet in his office, pulled out a 13 year old rules binder, dusted it off, walked it down to Coach Carlise and said "These should work, just change the word "Jordan" to the word "T-Mac"

Detroit's Bonderman earns first major league win by outdueling Zito
Aww yeah, the youngin' beats Cy Zito! Who's the man? Who's the Man? What do you mean it's only their second win?

New Looks:
Atlanta CyberFalcons
Detroit Lions

Lions gets a thumbs up, it's a subtle, but positive change.
The Falcons jerseys just make me want to go down to the GeorgiaDome and chant "Jonathan, Jonathan."

Question of the Day: Which team is more inept, currently and long-term, the Bengals or the Lions?
I'll take comments.

The Comedy Order: (from The Good Doctor!)
1). Monkeys
2). Pirates
3). Sherpas
4). Tractors

We'll take suggestions as to anything else that is always funny, no matter what, or makes something funnier, no questions asked.

Today's highlights:
From World History:
From AP US History:
From International Relations:
We're on vacation!

Random Simpsons Quote:
Lisa: "Is your remarkably sexist drivel intentional or just some kind of horrible mistake?"

---

The Barker 128-Band Tournament of Champions--Day 04
Vote by logging into the comments widget or emailing me by 10:00 pm EST FRIDAY. We'll tally and post the results then.

OK, that is all. Thank you, and let's be careful out there.
--The Commissioner

---

Yesterday's Results from the Mid-Atlantic Regional, at Comcast Center in College Park, MD
# 1 Nirvana--30 votes
#16 Counting Crows--9 votes
Abstentions: 0
Oncoming Traffic: 1

Match Comments (Best only):
"#1. Nirvana, in our first 40-point blowout of the tournament"
--The Bruce

"There's a reason Nirvana's a #1 seed -- no rooting for the underdog here. Besides, who ever told Counting Crows that "Mr. Jones" should not only be a single, but should get airplay? Kurt and the boys get my vote. I only wish that when Kurt sang "... And I swear that I don't have a gun ..." that he'd been telling the truth."
--The Bug Doctor

---

# 9 The Commodores--17 votes
# 8 Journey--17 votes
Abstentions: 3
Oncoming Traffic: 1
OVERTIME: Commissioner Breaks Tie...Journey Advances.
Reason 1: If they didn't, someone would never forgive me.
Reason 2: I really love Don't Stop Believin', errors in geography non-withstanding.
Reason 3: See Reason 1, except said person would likely also kick my ass.
Reason 4: Like Greg said, they had the video game.
Reason 5: I asked myself "What Would Journey Do?" and this is the conclusion I reached.

Match Comments (Best only):
"The Commodores... Journey? Journey? Maybe Journey ought to journey to Syracuse, (which, BTW, IS NOT IN NEW ENGLAND) or better yet, the old tried-and-true that is Camden."
--Senor GeorgraphicSnitPants

"Because of the _Baseketball_ reference. "Steeeeve Perry!""
--Mrs. Gerbil #1

"Journey in a friggin' blowout. Y102 still loves you, Journey!!"
--The Curator

"Steve Perry is on a friend of mine's list of 5 and on my girlfriend's exception list past the list of 5. He's a PA legend and if you were listening to Y102 you'd hear Journey every day, all day."
--Marist MU

"Journey - My initial reaction was to vote for the Commodores, but that would only be a tacit endorsement of Lionel Richie, and well, nobody needs that."
--The Virginian

"Journey: Lionel Richie is the Judas of funk, while Steve Perry is just a common or garden-variety sellout."
--The Vaccinator

---

Yesterday's Results from the Mid-Atlantic Regional, at Reynolds Coliseum in Raleigh, NC
# 5 Buddy Holly and The Crickets--31 votes
#12 Madness--6 votes
Abstentions: 0
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"Buddy Holly & the Crickets - Yes, he's still the best thing to come out of Lubbock, Texas."
--The Virginian

"Buddy Holly and the Crickets -- Madness was probably the better band if historical influence is taken out of play, but Buddy Holly wrote better songs and the Crickets had to help invent this stuff so I have to throw them the love."
--The One-Eyed Squirrel

"Buddy Holly. It took American rock and roll years to recover from the Day the Music Died. Had Holly lived, would the British Invasion have been so sweeping? These considerations make the choice easy."
--RickT.

---

#13 Prince and the Revolution--25 votes
# 4 Blondie--10 votes
Abstentions: 1
Oncoming Traffic: 1
Upset city, baybee!

Match Comments (Best only):
"And as usual, the two bands I like are up against each other. Barker has it in for me! I know it!

Truth is, I absolutely adore Blondie, so this isn't that tough. I like listening to Prince, but I don't own any of his stuff, nor have I really felt compelled to. (The power of Prince compels you!)

Not to mention the fact that I have an odd connection to Blondie -- Blondie songs were #1 in the US both when I was born and when I assume I was conceived. Guess it's just in the blood!"
--Studio 176

"Prince and the Revolution. Prince is the perfect hero for weird, skinny guys of a particular time and age. Victoria, you make me feel old. Do you want to know what I was doing to "Heart of Glass" and "The Tide is High"?"
--The BrickHouse

"Blondie: Because Prince was better solo than with the Revolution. Purple Rain is actually a one man show with some help. The real Revolution albums are Parade and Around the World in a Day, generally considered to be two of his worst, though you won't hear it from me. Besides, Clem Burke bought me beer one night because I asked him to sign Dramarama albums."
--Blasmo Callow

"Only questionable eligibility put the Purple One at #13. And only the fact that we're limiting ourselves to the three albums credited to "Prince & The Revolution" makes this even close. And this is despite that fact that I consider "The Best of Blondie" essential to my collection."
--The Answer Guy

"Prince and the Revolution – I have no idea how Blondie and Prince had to face off against each other. Or how Prince wound up as a 13 seed. In any case, I have to go with the purple paisley one. Blondie veered too closely into disco for my taste (or at least tried to co-opt the disco thing, which may be worse). I also have to think that there is an entire generation of people around my own age who shared the fear that their folks would actually hear the lyrics to “Darling Nikki,” so there’s a bonding thing there, too."
--The Wizard of Babson Park

" Prince & t. R. Where Prince never got his due, I think, is as a rock guitarist. Just some astounding solos. These four albums (inc. 1999, the Revolution played on it) aren't even Prince's finest moment, but they alone top Blondie. Debbie Harry is still a better rapper than the Purple One, though..."
--Gerbil #1

"Blondie by ten miles. Is there a song more fun than "Rapture" anywhere? A better stalking song than "One Way or Another"? A worse marching band song than "Call Me" (though Pitt used to try anyway)? But as the guy who blackballed Prince twice, I don't like the way voting is trending here."
--The Stepson of Troy

---

Today's Matchups from the Mid-Atlantic Regional, at the Smith Center in Chapel Hill, NC

# 3 Duran Duran
vs.
#14 The Monkees

Duran Duran: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
The Reflex
A View to a Kill
Ordinary World
Save a Prayer
Rio
Hungry Like the Wolf
Girls on Film
Union of the Snake
New Moon on Monday
All She Wants Is
Electric Barbarella
Come Undone

The Monkees: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Little Bit Me, A Little Bit You
Take a Giant Step
Pleasant Valley Sunday
I'm a Believer
(I'm Not Your) Steppin' Stone
Last Train to Clarksville
(Theme From) The Monkees
Daydream Believer

#11 Huey Lewis and the News
vs.
# 6 The Sex Pistols

Huey Lewis and the News: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Stuck With You
If This Is It
I Want a New Drug
Hip to Be Square
Heart of Rock & Roll
Heart and Soul
Workin' for a Livin'
Power of Love
Who Cares?
Walking on a Thin Line
Back in Time
Do You Believe In Love

The Sex Pistols: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Pretty Vacant
Holidays in the Sun
God Save the Queen
Bodies
Anarchy in the U.K.
Submission
Seventeen
Problems
No Feelings
Liar

---

Today's Matchups from the Mid-Atlantic Regional, at Cameron Student Events Center in Durham, NC

# 7 The Bee Gees
vs.
#10 The Smashing Pumpkins

The Bee Gees: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Lonely Days
How Can You Mend a Broken Heart
Run to Me
Jive Talkin'
Nights on Broadway
Fanny (Be Tender With My Love)
Love So Right
If I Can't Have You
Love Me
You Should Be Dancing
Stayin' Alive
How Deep Is Your Love
Night Fever
More Than a Woman
Emotion
Too Much Heaven
Tragedy
Love You Inside Out

The Smashing Pumpkins: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Cherub Rock
Today
Disarm
Muzzle
Landslide
Bullet With Butterfly Wings
1979
Zero
Tonight, Tonight
Eye
Ava Adore
Perfect

#15 J. Giels Band
vs.
# 2 Queen

J. Geils Band: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Looking for Love
Love Stinks
Whammer Jammer
Freeze-Frame
Centerfold
Detroit Breakdown
Must of Got Lost
Angel in Blue
Pack Fair and Square
One Last Kiss

Queen: Song Highlights from AMG:
We Will Rock You/We Are the Champions
Another One Bites the Dust
Killer Queen
Somebody to Love
Fat Bottomed Girls
Bicycle Race
You're My Best Friend
Crazy Little Thing Called Love
Princes of the Universe
I Want to Break Free
Bohemian Rhapsody
Under Pressure
Radio Ga Ga
Who Wants to Live Forever
The Show Must Go On

---

That's all for today, until tomorrow,
I'm Craig Barker, swept up in the ratings.

Thought for the Day: Apparently the operative word in Vacation is Vacate.
April 23, 2003

First things first:
Sorry, we're busy busy today, so all you get is tournament.

Today's highlights:
From World History:
From AP US History:
From International Relations:
We're on vacation!

Random Simpsons Quote:
Homer: "Mr. Scorpio says productivity is up 2%, and it's all because of my motivational techniques, like donuts and the possibility of more donuts to come."

---

The Barker 128-Band Tournament of Champions--Day 03
Vote by logging into the comments widget or emailing me by 8:00 pm EST THURSDAY. We'll tally and post the results then.

OK, that is all. Thank you, and let's be careful out there.
--The Commissioner

---

Yesterday's Results from the New England Regional, at the CarrierDome in Syracuse, NY
# 3 The Eagles--25 votes
#14 Derek and the Dominoes--14 votes
Abstentions: 2
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"Derek and the Dominos – The Butler of this tournament. I own Layla and Other Assorted Love Songs (close enough to their greatest hits for government work), and would only own the Eagles greatest hits album by court order. And even then I’d consider contempt."
--The Wizard of Babson Park

"Have to go with the Dominoes and avoid The Noid or whatever. Regarding those who voted for The Eagles, take it from their hit "Desperado": Why don't you come to your senses? In the paraphrased words of Bill Maher, "The Eagles make me want to stab them with my steely knives until I just CAN kill the beast."
--VwlssWndr

"The Eagles. Yes, Clapton is God. However, on each band's merits the Eagles deserve it. It's a shame Clapton's great legacy is fractured across enough bands that he might not get sufficient props here."
--RickT.

"The Eagles. I don't care about the asterisk. It doesn't mean a thing. Maybe the Gipsy Kings ought to be there instead even though no one nominated them because this guy was too busy putting out fires all over the place."
--Senor Huh?Pants

"The Eagles (Paging Mr. Tritt -- more Eagles covers, please.)"
--The Mathematical Bulldogg

"The Eagles over Derek in the Dominoes. If I want Clapton in a short-lived band, I'll take the Louisiana Gator Boys..."
--The Token Hoosier

"Derek and the Dominos: The Eagles are easily the most misogynistic band from the 1970's that wanted to be the Beatles (well, as rich as them). They're also pretty damned stupid. Note that immediately upon leaving the group, Don Henley went on to write intelligent, passionate songs about Real things, and immediately upon reuniting, stopped. That he can do both says something about being married to Maren Jensen, or the influence on Glenn Frey. Oh, screw it. Derek and the Dominoes' one real album is so much better than anything the Eagles did that it's funny. You tell me that "Desperado" is better than "Bell Bottom Blues," or any one minute of the Clapton/Altman twin guitar attack. Friggin' Barenaked Ladies over XTC. That's like choosing Vanilla Ice armed with a dictionary over Public Enemy..."
--Blasmo

---

#11 The Velvet Underground--8 votes
# 6 Elvis Costello and the Attractions--30 votes
Abstentions: 2
Oncoming Traffic: 1

Match Comments (Best only):
"Elvis and the Attractions in a close one. There are only rarely moments when I don't feel like listening to Elvis, but I won't listen to VU if I'm feeling overly buoyant or overly morose. For reasons of personal sanity."
--Studio 176

"Costello: Holy s**t! Barker, you animal, putting these two against each other. Both incredibly influential. Both filled to the brim with genius. Both released problematic albums that have aged incredibly well. Easily the most ridiculous early match up in this thing, since they're both so good. Yes, it's the Beatles versus the Stones already. Flipped a coin. Several times. Then got drunk and remembered Costello's cover of Peace, Love, and Understanding. If only he'd maintained focus..."
--Blasmo

---

Yesterday's Results from the New England Regional, at The Centrum in Worcester, MA
# 7 The Jimi Hendrix Experience--31 votes
#10 Jefferson Airplane--9 votes
Abstentions: 1
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"I have been friends with both druggy, brilliant guys and bitchy, dominating sluts. Based on that,, I must go with the drug guys here."
--The Raging Lemur

"No way, no how the Jimi Hendrix Experience should be lower than a three seed."
--Cardinal

"Hendrix in Worcester. My Mom saw Hendrix in Worcester once. (obviously not @ the Centrum - it wasnt built yet) Only eligibility issues made Hendrix (and his two great cohorts Noel Redding and Mitch Mitchell) a #7. The Airplane, for all its Summer of Love zeitgeist, just can't compete."
--The Answer Guy

"Jefferson Airplane because if I had to choose this based on what greatest hits I'd want, I'd have to go with the songs with more words than guitar."
--The Curator

"Hendrix's virtuosity was awesome. However, every time I go to a karaoke party I get requests to sing "White Rabbit", so this one's a bit personal. :-) It's Jefferson Airplane for me, edging Jimi by the height of Grace Slick's hair."
----The Bug Doctor

"Hendrix is a god. No one before or since can make a guitar speak like he could."
--GZ

---

#15 Styx--15 votes
# 2 Pearl Jam--24 votes
Abstentions: 2
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"Pearl Jam - When the addition of Eric Cartman's voice improves your work, it's not a good sign."
--The Virginian

"I don't care that they're going to lose. Come sail away and Mr Roboto are the foundation of American comedy today. Without these songs we'd have no seranades from Eric Cartman and would lose the high comedy of the Robot in sitcoms and movies. GO STYX!"
--Marist MU

"Hey, what the hell, Styx! And all those suckmonkeys that voted for BNL over XTC should remember "King of Bedside Manor" and vote Styx as well. oh yeah -- interested in what the regional brackets look like? Go here."
--Gerbil #1

"Pearl Jam. I've never liked either of them, but Pearl Jam's contributions to '90s music are obvious, and as far as I know, they don't have any Worst Song Ever candidates. Styx has several, 3 or 4 of which are actually listed here. How they received enough support to make the field while the Isley Brothers and Kool and the Gang did not is beyond me."
--The Grandmaster of W. Mass. Funk

"Pearl Jam: Domo arigato, Styx, but your services are no longer required."
--The Vaccinator

"Pearl Jam. Styx got questions about them on "It's Academic" in Washington and Baltimore because they could always add the clue: shares their name with a river in Hades from Greek mythology."
--The BrickHouse

"Pearl Jam. However, Styx deserved a slightly higher seed than 15, though. The first two Pearl Jam albums make this an easy choice."
--JQSmooth

"#2. Pearl Jam. Neat thing about the included song list is being reminded of great songs you'd forgotten about, in this case "Given to Fly.""
--The Bruce

"Pearl Jam: Ha,ha,ha,ha! Styx…made it… into a Best Bands…competition!!! Hayseuss marimmba!!! Dennis DeHunchback take over!!! This says more about …ha,ha,ha,ha… the XTC decision….ha,ha,ha,ha…than anything else. Oh, this thing's supposed to be funny? Well, Bay City Rollers crossed with Kansas, no vote for you! Ha,ha,ha,ha…no, seriously, people actually think Styx is good? There's more talent in the outgroove on an XTC record than anything ever thought of by Styx. The Grand Illusion is that there's any talent or songwriting depth in a Mt. Everest full of Styx albums."
--Blasmo

"Styx -- Not one, but two concept albums and internal fighting for the soul of a band, what more can anyone ask?!?!?"
--Gerbil #3

"Pearl Jam--Am I the only one who is depressed to hear that Pearl Jam tickets are available through Ticketmaster?"
--Mrs. Gerbil #1
(Commissioner's Note: Are you kidding? June 25, DTE Energy Music Theater at Pine Knob on the Lawn! My high school ambition finally made real!)

---

Today's Matchups from the Mid-Atlantic Regional, at Comcast Center in College Park, MD

# 1 Nirvana
vs.
#16 Counting Crows

Nirvana: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Something in the Way
Smells Like Teen Spirit
Polly
In Bloom
Lithium
Come as You Are
Dive
Heart Shaped Box
Aneurysm
All Apologies

Counting Crows: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
A Long December
Hangin' Around
Round Here
Mr. Jones
A Murder of One
Omaha
Daylight Fading
The Rain King
I Wish I Was a Girl
Goodnight Elisabeth
Mrs. Potter's Lullaby
American Girls

# 9 The Commodores
vs.
# 8 Journey

The Commodores: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Three Times a Lady
Easy
Brick House
Wonderland
Just to Be Close to You
Sweet Love
Sail On
Fancy Dancer
Still
Nightshift

Journey: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Who's Crying Now
Send Her My Love
Separate Ways (Worlds Apart)
Open Arms
Don't Stop Believin'
Any Way You Want It
When You Love a Woman
Party's over (Hopelessly in Love)
Wheel in the Sky
Faithfully
Lights

---

Today's Matchups from the Mid-Atlantic Regional, at Reynolds Coliseum in
Raleigh, NC

# 5 Buddy Holly and The Crickets
vs.
#12 Madness

Buddy Holly and The Crickets: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Words of Love
Well...All Right
Think It Over
That'll Be the Day
Rave On
Peggy Sue
Oh, Boy!
Not Fade Away
Maybe Baby
It's So Easy

Madness: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Our House
My Girl
One Step Beyond
Night Boat to Cairo
Madness
It Must Be Love
House of Fun
Cardiac Arrest
Baggy Trousers
Shut Up

#13 Prince and the Revolution
vs.
# 4 Blondie

Prince and the Revolution: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Let's Go Crazy
Darling Nikki
When Doves Cry
I Would Die 4 U
Baby I'm a Star
Purple Rain
Around the World in a Day
Raspberry Beret
Pop Life
The Ladder
Temptation
Kiss

Blondie: Song Highlights from AMG:
X Offender
The Tide Is High
Rapture
One Way or Another
Heart of Glass
Call Me {Theme from American Gigolo}
11:59
Maria
Union City Blue
Sunday Girl

---

That's all for today, until tomorrow,
I'm Craig Barker, raiding other people's basements for comedy.

Thought for the Day: We can be heroes, if just for one day.
April 22, 2003

First things first:
ESPN's Page2 is doing it's tributes to Heroes and Villians in Sports this week. I love the concept and was especially taken by today's sports heroes of the Page 2 Authors.

And because I have my own forum for writing, well, here's mine.

Heroes are a tricky thing. You can admire, and respect, and hold dear different people for different reasons. For example, I think my sister is one of the greatest athletes I have ever known, a superb goalkeeper and an even better person, one who will be a great math teacher down the road and is already an excellent coach. My brother was a fantastic wrestler, and I would be remiss not to mention him, in part because he would kick my ass, or break a taillight, or something, you know, he has options.

Being a Detroiter, I also have an abiding affection for people like Ted Lindsay (for his efforts founding the NHLPA in addition to his play), or Joe Dumars (the man could play, pure and simple), or Alan Trammell (for being a martyr after years of great play at the 6) or Stevie Y (he had the knee freaking realigned and managed to come back).

But in the end, I will have to go with my ultimate sports hero, Lloyd Carr.
Point 1: Before he was a big-time football coach, he was a small time football coach at Westland John Glenn who also happened to be a U.S. History teacher.
Point 2: He got Michigan out of the 8-4 malaise and convinced a new generation of Michigan fans that the Big Ten title and a trip to Pasadena was not what we should be striving for, that the true sign of accomplishment was to win a National Title. He then took a team that had a couple of amazing players and took them to a National Title. (It's also why Phil "F*cking" Fulmer is on my list of sports villians. Who votes an undefeated Big Ten team 4th on your coaches poll ballot, I mean REALLY!)
Point 3: He;s as boring as dishwater. You can have your firey insane coaches who want you to stay at a Fairfield Inn (Yes, I am looking at you Mr. Holtz), but I will happily take boring and 10 wins a year any day.
Point 4: Coach Carr sponsors a women's football camp every year to benefot cancer research. You gotta like that.
Point 5: Rose Bowl, check. Orange Bowl, check. Citrus Bowl, check. Outback Bowl, check. Next stop, Sugar Bowl!

OK, that is all, to the finest alumnus of Riverview High School that I don't know personally or that didn't start PromiseKeepers, huzzah Lloyd!

Also from Page 2's Daily Quickie (Written by an NU alum, so you know it's good!):
"Where Are They Now?" File: Fennis "One Shining Mag Cover" Dembo made news as the subject of investigation for a weekend shooting death in his house, though cops say the guy shot was a robber...

Today's highlights:
From World History:
From AP US History:
From International Relations:
We're on vacation!

Random Simpsons Quote:
Homer: "Kill my boss? Do i dare live out the American Dream?"

---

The Barker 128-Band Tournament of Champions--Day 02
Because Brick asked:
Blackballs, Powerballs, and the NIT:

Less Than Zero: Bands that Finished with Less Than Zero Votes:
Academy of St. Martin in the Fields -1
Ace of Base -1
Milli Vanilli -1
Silverchair -1
The Offspring -1
Faith No More -2
The Backstreet Boys -3
New Kids on the Block -6
Creed -9

All Blackballs:
Ace of Base (2), Creed (7), Culture Club, Dave Matthews Band (2), Destiny's Child, Dixie Chicks, Faith No More, Foo Fighters, Gary Puckett and the Union Gap, Genesis, Goo Goo Dolls, Hole, Jackson Five, Jefferson Starship, John Williams and the Boston Pops, KISS, Milli Vanilli, New Kids on the Block (4), Oasis (2), Phish, Prince and the NPG, Prince and the Revolution, Rage Against The Machine (2), Rush, Santana, Silverchair, Skinny Puppy, Spinal Tap, Sublime, The Backstreet Boys (2), The Offspring, The Pixies, Weezer (2)

All Powerballs:
Alabama, Black Sabbath (2), Blake Babies, Blue Oyster Cult, Bon Jovi, Boston, Cake, Chicago (3), Counting Crows, Creed, Dave Matthews Band, Devo, Diana Ross and the Supremes, ELO,
Jackson Five, Jimmy Buffett and the Coral Reefers (2), Journey, Los Lobos, Lyle Lovett and His Large Band (2), Madness, NWA, Oasis (2), Prince and the Revolution, Rush, Sleater-Kinney (2), Split Enz, Stevie Ray Vaughn and Double Trouble (2), Tangerine Dream, The (English) Beat, The Association, The Bee-Gees, The Drifters, The Four Seasons, The Grateful Dead, The Hollies, The Jimi Hendrix Experience, The Miracles, The Monkees, The Pogues, The Replacements, The The, The Turtles, The Verve, Three Dog Night, T.Rex, Wilco (4), Yo La Tengo

Note: Numbers do not equal out because some people refused to use all of their powerballs or blackballs.

The NIT (Bands That Just Missed the Cut):
10,000 Maniacs, A Tribe Called Quest, Crowded House, Dave Brubeck Quartet, De La Soul, Gin Blossoms, Husker Du, Jane's Addiction, Joy Division, Living Colour, New Order, Peter, Paul, and Mary, Soundgarden, Stone Temple Pilots, The Go-Go's, The Isley Brothers, Bachman-Turner Overdrive, Dixie Chicks, En Vogue, Everclear, Garbage, Grand Funk Railroad, Kool and the Gang, Massive Attack, Midnight Oil, Neil Young and (insert band here), Pavement, Smash Mouth, Steppenwolf, The (English) Beat, The Animals, The Association, The Coasters, The Doobie Brothers, The Flaming Lips, The Guess Who, The Kingston Trio, The Moody Blues, The Turtles,
The Verve, The Village People, The Yardbirds, Wings, Wu-Tang Clan

---

Now, for one last quick review of the rules, because it is the start of a new tournament, after all:
As you all remember, the idea is once again simple:
It's a single-elim tournament.

There are 128 artists, as selected by the crack selection committee (as opposed to the selection committee on crack, which was the first time.)

48 bands earned top seeds based upon the initial nominations of the committee and were placed into the field accordingly. The remaining 80 songs were voted upon by the nominators, each of whom had 48 votes, 2 powerballs (worth two) and two blackballs (worth minus two.)

All of the 16 seeds were bands that earned six votes from the group (there were 24 such bands.) Eight bands received a powerball from someone, and thus, seeing as it was a clean break and clearly ONE of our voters really wanted in the tournament, so who are we to deny them these bands.

All bands must have released three albums between 1955-2003, with the first album being released between 1955-1997. Bands who do not formally meet this requirement received waivers from the tournament committee, based upon their merits within the largesse of the rock era.

Voters should consider the following three things (in descending order) when voting:
1). Which band's theoretical greatest hits albums would you rather own/listen to?
2). Which band would you be more likely to leave on if they were going to be on the radio next?
3). Which band do you hate less?

As for matchups and inclusions, well, you have no one to blame but yourself. This thing is seeded, for goodness sakes. You voted on it, you wanted it, here's what you get.

I will attempt to provide links to the band's greatest hits or a list of "top songs" as well as the band's AMG biography page. And no bitching about the song lists, you may have your favorites, I went with AMG's list plus a few of my own.

Vote by logging into the comments widget or emailing me by 10:00 pm EST WEDNESDAY. We'll tally and post the results then.

OK, that is all. Thank you, and let's be careful out there.
--The Commissioner

---

Yesterday's Results from the New England Regional, at Dunkin Donuts Center in Providence, RI
# 1 Led Zeppelin--42 votes
#16 The Drifters--12 votes
Abstentions: 0
Oncoming Traffic: 0

Match Comments (Best only):
"Zeppelin of course. After all, the guys at the end of Little Nicky didn't buy the Drifters touring play. WPDH Classic Rock doesn't follow August with Drifter-tember."
--Marist MU

"Led Zep. That's three people out of four thusfar that voted for the Drifters because "Led Zeppelin" was going to win anyway. (There must be some sort of poli sci principle that covers this.) Another thing - Craig listed every Drifters song most people can name, while I can name a dozen Zep songs I would prefer to anything on that list."
--The Answer Guy

---

# 9 Cake--14 votes
# 8 They Might Be Giants--36 votes
Abstentions: 3
Oncoming Traffic: 1

Match Comments (Best only):
"Cake is rated TOO high - they're like the fifth-place team in the Big East who gets a bid despite going under .500 in the conference and losing 12 games."
--A Voice of America

"In the 'Battle of the Purposefully Alternative' I'll go with the They Might Be Giants. They've managed to weasel their way into mainstream culture as a reference point. That should count for something."
--The Curator

"TMBG - the starland vocal band is more deserving than cake to be on this list."
--JLear

---

Yesterday's Results from the New England Regional, at Verizon Wireless Arena in Manchester, NH
# 5 Barenaked Ladies--37 votes
#12 XTC--15 votes
Abstentions: 1
Oncoming Traffic: 1

Match Comments (Best only):
"I'll have to vote my age here, and choose XTC. After all, I've never named a live exotic chilopod after a Barenaked Ladies title!"
--The Bug Doctor

"Barenaked Ladies (please--XTC? What the hell?)"
--Cable Guy

"What's this? Rant material on Day 1? Okay. BNL wish they were XTC. BNL's paeans to youth wish they were "Life Begins at the Hop". "The Old Apartment" wishes it was as bitter a relationship song as "Your Dictionary." "If I Had $1000000" and "Life, In a Nutshell" wish they were nearly the giddy-in-love songs that "Ten Feet Tall" or "Mayor of Simpleton" are. "What A Good Boy" wishes it was half the bristling-against-parental-expectations song as "Making Plans for Nigel." Steven Page wishes he was a quarter of the witty angstpuppy genius Andy Partridge is. And what tape is currently in the car stereo? "Waxworks: Some Singles 1979-1983." XTC in a walk."
--Gerbil #1

---

#13 Foo Fighters--25 votes
# 4 Metallica--27 votes
Abstentions: 1
Oncoming Traffic: 1

23:03 4/22/2003

Match Comments (Best only):
"Foo Fighters -- Being forced to choose between these two just stings, but I know I'm going to need to get used to that feeling in this tournament. Metallica's body of work is probably better by artsy measures, but going by your whose greatest hits would you rather listen to rule of thumb, I have to vote for Grohl's crew since all of their albums make pretty frequent appearances in my CD players."
--The One-Eyed Squirrel

"Metallica – A “Damn Clippy” match up for me, but I have to go with these guys, who may not be keeping us safe from foo, but have been keeping the world safe for metal for well nigh unto two decades."
--The Wizard of Babson Park

"Metallica's the more influential band with more pop cultural impact. And I wouldn't listen to 'em unless there were some crazy, crazy extenuating circumstances. Foos take it."
--Studio 176

"Metallica. If your most famous member is the drummer, your band might be over-rated by rich white kids from the suburbs."
--The Brown Martyr of QB

---

Today's Matchups from the New England Regional, at the CarrierDome in Syracuse, NY

# 3 The Eagles
vs.
#14 Derek and the Dominoes*

*--Though they only had one studio album (and two live albums), they were granted a commissioner's waiver after making the finals of the original Barker tournament, thus putting an end to the debate. Period.

The Eagles: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Witchy Woman
Tequila Sunrise
One of These Nights
Take It to the Limit
Take It Easy
Already Gone
Peaceful Easy Feeling
Hotel California
Best of My Love
Desperado

Derek and the Dominoes: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Anyday
Why Does Love Got to Be So Sad?
Tell the Truth
Layla
Keep on Growing
Have You Ever Loved a Woman
Bell Bottom Blues
Thorn Tree in the Garden
Nobody Knows You When You're Down and Out
I Looked Away

#11 The Velvet Underground
vs.
# 6 Elvis Costello and the Attractions

The Velvet Underground: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
White Light/White Heat
What Goes On
Venus in Furs
Sweet Jane
Some Kinda Love
Sister Ray
Rock & Roll
Pale Blue Eyes
I'm Waiting for the Man
Heroin

Elvis Costello and the Attractions: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Alison
Watching the Detectives
(I Don't Want to Go to) Chelsea
Pump It Up
Radio, Radio
(What's So Funny 'Bout) Peace, Love, and Understanding
Oliver's Army
Accidents Will Happen
I Can't Stand Up for Falling Down
New Amsterdam
High Fidelity
Everyday I Write the Book
Less Than Zero

---

Today's Matchups from the New England Regional, at The Centrum in Worcester, MA

# 7 The Jimi Hendrix Experience
vs.
#10 Jefferson Airplane

The Jimi Hendrix Experience: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Voodoo Child (Slight Return)
Purple Haze
Manic Depression
Little Wing
Hey Joe
Foxey Lady
Fire
All Along the Watchtower
Wind Cries Mary
Wait Until Tomorrow
The Star-Spangled Banner (live)

Jefferson Airplane: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
She Has Funny Cars
Long John Silver
My Best Friend
Wooden Ships
Plastic Fantastic Lover
Volunteers
Crown of Creation
Today
White Rabbit
Somebody to Love

#15 Styx
vs.
# 2 Pearl Jam

Styx: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Too Much Time on My Hands
Mr. Roboto
Lady
Grand Illusion
Don't Let It End
Come Sail Away
Blue Collar Man
Best of Times
Babe
Why Me

Pearl Jam: Song Highlights from AMG:
Jeremy
Even Flow
Black
Daughter
Betterman
Alive
Yellow Ledbetter
Spin the Black Circle
I Got ID
Given to Fly
Wishlist

---

That's all for today, until tomorrow,
I'm Craig Barker, shocked but not awed.

Thought for the Day: Because two times is never enough
April 21, 2003

First things first:
Boston Marathon Serious for Will Ferrell
The day is mine Trebek!

Helmets save lives, people:
Props to the photo-og who snagged this hot, and very glad to hear that Sammy is OK.

Fan allegedly threw cell phone at Everett from second deck of stadium
I don't like Carl more than most of us, but he doesn't deserve this. I am just glad that the crack down is being cracked down on.

Lightning win fourth straight to finish off Capitals
To be fair, this makes far less sense in my sports universe than the Red Wings losing in four straight to the Mighty Ducks.

McGrady sets team playoff record with 43 as Magic beat Pistons 99-94
Ahem, gentlemen, didn't I say "Someone guard T-Mac?" And if I didn't "SOMEONE GUARD T-MAC!"

Science Fiction Fans to Get New Museum in Seattle
This is what happens when geeks get oodles of money and a philanthropy bent.

The New Goal:
Michigan 1930s Throwback Jersey #48 as worn by Gerald Ford
I want it for less than $100, if you get a line, drop me a line.

Today's highlights:
From World History:
From AP US History:
From International Relations:
We're on vacation!

Random Simpsons Quote:
Homer: "Life is just one crushing defeat after another until you just wish Flanders was dead."

Today's Phrase that Can Never Lead to Any Good:
Trio Set to Scale Musical 'Heights' for MTV


Today's Installment of "I am shocked, Louie, just quite simply shocked!"
Tigers fall to 1-16 on errors in ninth.
Make the hurting stop. I can't believe that it's late April and I already want my team put down. On the plus side, they are singlehandedly keeping Dumb and Dombrowski in second place in the Bonifay. Of course, they are also keeping the Coldplay Shivers in 10th in the QBBL.

---

The Barker 128-Band Tournament of Champions--Day 01
Firstly, here's the quick alphabetical list (with their seed and region) of who is in this thing:
ABBA 5 HL
AC/DC 4 GS
Aerosmith 2 DS
Alabama 16 MT
Barenaked Ladies 5 NE
Ben Folds Five 10 GL
Bill Haley and the Comets 10 MS
Black Sabbath 10 DS
Blondie 4 AC
Bob Marley and the Wailers 4 MT
Bob Seger and the Silver Bullet Band 9 GS
Bon Jovi 7 MT
Boston 14 HL
Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band 5 MT
Buddy Holly and the Crickets 5 AC
Cake 9 NE
Cheap Trick 12 GS
Chicago 7 HL
Counting Crows 16 AC
Cream 5 GS
Creedence Clearwater Revival 2 GS
Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young 6 GS
Dave Matthews Band 11 DS
Def Leppard 14 GS
Depeche Mode 13 GS
Derek and the Dominoes 14 NE
Devo 9 HL
Diana Ross and the Supremes 7 GS
Dire Straits 7 DS
Duran Duran 3 AC
Earth, Wind, and Fire 11 MS
Electric Light Orchestra 16 GL
Elvis Costello and the Attractions 6 NE
Fleetwood Mac 4 MS
Foo Fighters 13 NE
Frank Zappa and the Mothers of Invention 10 HL
Genesis 11 GL
Gladys Knight and the Pips 13 HL
Green Day 6 HL
Guns 'n' Roses 3 MS
Huey Lewis and the News 11 AC
Iggy & the Stooges 15 MT
INXS 7 GL
J. Geils Band 15 AC
Jackson 5 8 MT
James Brown & the JB's 13 DS
Jefferson Airplane 10 NE
Jimmy Buffett and the Coral Reefers 11 MT
Journey 8 AC
KC and the Sunshine Band 8 MS
KISS 13 MS
Led Zeppelin 1 NE
Los Lobos 12 MT
Lyle Lovett and his Large Band 16 MS
Lynyrd Skynyrd 10 GS
Madness 12 AC
Martha and the Vandellas 15 GL
Metallica 4 NE
Nirvana 1 AC
No Doubt 13 GL
NWA 16 DS
Oasis 15 MS
Parliament-Funkadelic 4 GL
Pearl Jam 2 NE
Pink Floyd 3 DS
Prince and the Revolution 13 AC
Public Enemy 4 HL
Queen 2 AC
R.E.M. 1 GL
Radiohead 5 GL
Ramones 2 MT
Red Hot Chili Peppers 7 MS
Roxy Music 9 DS
Run DMC 4 DS
Rush 12 GL
Santana 8 DS
Sleater-Kinney 13 MT
Sly and the Family Stone 9 MS
Squeeze 15 DS
Squirrel Nut Zippers 15 HL
Steve Miller Band 12 MS
Stevie Ray Vaughn and Double Trouble 9 GL
Styx 15 NE
T.Rex 16 HL
Talking Heads 2 MS
The Allman Brothers Band 15 GS
The B-52s 8 GL
The Band 5 MS
The Bangles 14 MT
The Beach Boys 1 GS
The Beastie Boys 3 HL
The Beatles 1 MT
The Bee Gees 7 AC
The Byrds 11 GS
The Cars 5 DS
The Clash 1 MS
The Commodores 9 AC
The Cure 8 HL
The Doors 6 DS
The Drifters 16 NE
The Eagles 3 NE
The Four Seasons 12 DS
The Four Tops 6 MS
The Grateful Dead 9 MT
The Jimi Hendrix Experience 7 NE
The Kinks 3 GS
The Mamas and the Papas 6 GL
The Miracles 16 GS
The Monkees 14 AC
The Police 2 GL
The Pretenders 10 MT
The Replacements 14 GL
The Rolling Stones 1 HL
The Sex Pistols 6 AC
The Smashing Pumpkins 10 AC
The Smiths 12 HL
The Temptations 3 GL
The Velvet Underground 11 NE
The Who 1 DS
They Might Be Giants 8 NE
Three Dog Night 14 MS
Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers 6 MT
U2 2 HL
Van Halen 3 MT
Violent Femmes 14 DS
Wilco 8 GS
XTC 12 NE
ZZ Top 11 HL

Now, a quick review of the rules, because it is the start of a new tournament, after all:
As you all remember, the idea is once again simple:
It's a single-elim tournament.

There are 128 artists, as selected by the crack selection committee (as opposed to the selection committee on crack, which was the first time.)

48 bands earned top seeds based upon the initial nominations of the committee and were placed into the field accordingly. The remaining 80 songs were voted upon by the nominators, each of whom had 48 votes, 2 powerballs (worth two) and two blackballs (worth minus two.)

All of the 16 seeds were bands that earned six votes from the group (there were 24 such bands.) Eight bands received a powerball from someone, and thus, seeing as it was a clean break and clearly ONE of our voters really wanted in the tournament, so who are we to deny them these bands.

All bands must have released three albums between 1955-2003, with the first album being released between 1955-1997. Bands who do not formally meet this requirement received waivers from the tournament committee, based upon their merits within the largesse of the rock era.

Voters should consider the following three things (in descending order) when voting:
1). Which band's theoretical greatest hits albums would you rather own/listen to?
2). Which band would you be more likely to leave on if they were going to be on the radio next?
3). Which band do you hate less?

As for matchups and inclusions, well, you have no one to blame but yourself. This thing is seeded, for goodness sakes. You voted on it, you wanted it, here's what you get.

I will attempt to provide links to the band's greatest hits or a list of "top songs" as well as the band's AMG biography page. And no bitching about the song lists, you may have your favorites, I went with AMG's list plus a few of my own.

Vote by logging into the comments widget or emailing me by 10:00 pm EST TUESDAY. We'll tally and post the results then.

OK, that is all. Thank you, and let's be careful out there.
--The Commissioner

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Today's Matchups from the New England Regional, at Dunkin Donuts Center in Providence, RI

# 1 Led Zeppelin
vs.
#16 The Drifters

Led Zeppelin: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Whole Lotta Love
Stairway to Heaven
The Song Remains the Same
Rock and Roll
Ramble On
Kashmir
Heartbreaker/Living Loving Maid
Dazed and Confused
Dancing Days
Communication Breakdown
Over Hills and Far Away
Hey Hey What Can I Do?

The Drifters: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Ruby Baby
Money Honey
White Christmas
This Magic Moment
Such a Night
Save the Last Dance for Me
Up on the Roof
There Goes My Baby
Under the Boardwalk
On Broadway

# 9 Cake
vs.
# 8 They Might Be Giants

Cake: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
Stickshifts and Safetybelts
Never There
The Distance
Comanche
Jolene
Rock & Roll Lifestyle
Satan Is My Motor
Sheep Go to Heaven
I Will Survive

They Might Be Giants: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
They'll Need a Crane
Put Your Hand Inside the Puppet Head
Purple Toupee
Everything Right Is Wrong Again
Don't Let's Start
Birdhouse in Your Soul
Ana Ng
(She Was A) Hotel Detective
She's an Angel
It's Not My Birthday
Istanbul, Not Constantinople
Particle Man

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Today's Matchups from the New England Regional, at Verizon Wireless Arena in Manchester, NH

# 5 Barenaked Ladies
vs.
#12 XTC

Barenaked Ladies: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
It's All Been Done
Jane
Be My Yoko Ono
One Week
If I Had $1000000
Brian Wilson
Call and Answer
Grade 9
If I Fall
What a Good Boy

XTC: Song Highlights from AMG:
Respectable Street
This Is Pop?
Dear God
Chalkhills and Children
Ballad of Peter Pumpkinhead
Are You Receiving Me?
Senses Working Overtime
No Thugs in Our House
Making Plans for Nigel
Generals and Majors

#13 Foo Fighters
vs.
# 4 Metallica

Foo Fighters: Song Highlights from AMG and CDB:
This Is a Call
My Hero
Monkey Wrench
Learn to Fly
I'll Stick Around
Big Me
Stacked Actors
Floaty
Breakout
Walking After You

Metallica: Song Highlights from AMG:
Seek & Destroy
One
Master of Puppets
Jump in the Fire
For Whom the Bell Tolls
Fade to Black
Enter Sandman
Wherever I May Roam
Welcome Home (Sanitarium)
Until It Sleeps
The Unforgiven

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That's all for today, until tomorrow,
I'm Craig Barker, still crazy after all these tournaments.