Thought for the Day: Ranging Far and Wide
August 11, 2003
First things first:
A busy weekend in sports...and then some fun and games.
Tigers Incompetence Metrics as of August 11, 2003:
Detroit 30-85 .261 winning percentage (1.25 games ABOVE the Throneberry Line)
Detroit team's batting average: .234
Detroit opponent batting average: .276
Detroit's on-base percentage: .295
Still need 11 Wins to Beat Infamy
(41 wins would give them a winning percentage above the .250 of the 1962 Mets.)
Twins continue mindboggling mastery of TigersTo be fair, at least yesterday they looked like they were trying. Unlike on Saturday...
Petrick kills rally with stupidity
"Pinch-runner Ben Petrick was retired in an unusual way in the seventh. He broke for second on a full count to Carlos Pena, and was thrown out even though the pitch was ball four. Because Petrick overslid the base, he was ruled to have reached second on the walk, then left the base, making him eligible to be tagged out."
THE UNDERCOVER FAN: Many Tigers fans look past team's futility
Standout sentence here: "The Tigers have averaged 18,122 for home games this year."
That is simply amazing to me. Imagine what will happen if they ever get mediocre, let alone good.
Furcal turns 12th unassisted triple play ever
This is always pretty cool.
Lions get defensive, roll past Steelers in Mariucci's debut
I don't want to get too excited, it is just the first game of the exhibition season, but it sure seemed like the Lions played with a lot more spirit, certainly a lot more professionalism than we are used to seeing. The safety was nice, but I would have liked to see the offense execute earlier than the last drive of the second half. Then again, we did importantly learn not to throw it to stone-hands.
They have the Bungles this week (who looked same as it ever was yesterday), so we'll see what happens. I also would like to see how CRogers plays.
Comedy from the game on Saturday:
Email to The Good Doctor:
"If I told you that it was Pittsburgh 3, Detroit 2 in the 2nd, we would have to presume Wings/Pens or Bucs/Tigers, right?"
Email from The Head Keenan:
"Did you remember to put down the prop bet for the Lions opening the X-season with a safety?"
My unwitty retort:
"No, sadly, while in Vegas, I could not find Big Stan's House of Wacky Prop Bets, also known as England."
Which begs a question: Why hasn't someone decided that the next thing Vegas needs is a British themed casino, Gentlemen, I give you Brittania! Gambling with all the glitz and glamour of the British Isles. Best of all, the waitresses and showgirls are all real Brits -- fresh from the streets of Sussex, they are. [wink and nod].
Brian Murphy: Mooch: A Lion, All of a Sudden...
Murph also takes on the California governor's race (and fails to point out that both Gollum and Terry Tate seem to be running.)
Iverson enjoys practice, but not questions on Kobe
But we're talking about practice!
The Top Ten Worst Sports Ideas
Come on, how can we diss the league that gave us the notion that someone, perhaps he, does in fact, hate me! And I'm sorry, Dennis Miller on Monday Night Football was as brilliant an idea as the Chillicothe Baking Co. executive who said in 1928 "You know, we have the best idea in the world, we'll pre-slice bread."
Also Dwight, you see that they are dissing the meat gun technology!
Clarett/Jackson Fraught Watch
Clarett: Clarett hopes to suit up for Ohio State this season
Jackson: U-M's Carr stands by Jackson
More proof SI Hates Michigan:
Michigan Only 7th Most Powerful Program in Nation
And some proof that maybe someone there gets it:
Why does everyone blame John Navarre for all of Michigan’s struggles? Will someone please give this guy the credit he deserves?
"It’s a good point. The way Michigan fans grumble about him, you’d think Navarre was a 18-touchdown, 19-interception kind of guy. Try 2,905 yards, 21 touchdowns and 7 interceptions last year...But I have a theory that in college football, where a player’s life span is often little more than 20 games, initial impressions are tough to overcome. Navarre got stuck early on with the 'second choice' label after Drew Henson left for baseball, and the lasting image of him for some people is that awful Ohio State game two years ago... Ultimately, Navarre will be judged on whether he wins 'the big game,' something he’s had few chances to do his first three years. He might also get his completion percentage up from last year’s 55.3 mark, but that means getting some help from his receivers. I seem to recall Braylon Edwards dropping a lot of balls last year, particularly against Iowa...And for that, Edwards gets to wear the famed No. 1 jersey while Navarre gets to wear the so-called 'question mark' label. Funny how that works."
The spectre of Drew looms large over Mr. Navarre. I wonder what would happen if John were wearing the #7 jersey...or if he hadn't lost that UCLA game.
Maryland football gets a year's probie for coach's payments to recruit
Well, that certainly seems fair, given what they gave to Utah basketball.
ESPN: Which conference has the best head coaches?
This is far more about the cult of JoePa than the cult of Lloyd, which is small, but fierce. Much like real wolverines.
Wiffle Ball Celebrates 50th Anniversary
I just thought this was cool...
Something for those of you who like this cards thing:
Five Highlights From The World Poker Tour
What I am reading:
Ok, so I acquired a ton of books this weekend, between a gift from Studio, or a purchasing binge at the bookstore on Saturday morning.
So, what am I reading?
Clueless in Academe: How Schooling Obscures the Life of the Mind by Gerald Graff
A very intriguing look into how schools are actually somewhat counter productive to encouraging the growth of the intellect.
Robert Kennedy: His Life by Evan Thomas
It was on the discount rack, and the subject intrigues me.
The Complete Book of Heraldry by Stephen Slater
Yes, I know, I am a complete dork, but it was also on deep discount.
The Ultimate Book of Sports Lists by Andrew Postman and Larry Stone
Welcome to Lead-inville, population me.
Victors Valiant: The Most Spectacular Sights and Sounds of Michigan Football by Althon Sports
Only because it was also on sale and because it came with a CD's worth of Bob Ufer calls.
The Official NFL 2003 Record & Fact Book by the NFL
All the better to annoy you with.
And what am I listening to, you might ask?
Good question. It's my mom's fault. She was signing on AOL the other day and the AOL Broadband Presents concert was The Who Live at the Royal Albert Hall and she was listening to it and we were enjoying it as we talked and it sort of got stuck in my head.
It's really good, and not like good for being nearly 60 good, but like, really entertaining! "The Relay" is particularly good.
Always one to steal a great idea:
You can see what Alexis did here first.
I did pretty well, especially considering my lack of in-depth Chicago knowledge.
So, always one to steal an idea, and always happy to promote my beloved home tri-county area, I present to you:
Detroit Landmarks
Directions: The first letter of each word of the following clues is identical to those of famous Detroit (or Detroit metro area) buildings, monuments, landmarks, parks, streets, hotels, etc. For example, the answer to the following clue "Domesticated Zebras" is "Detroit Zoo." See how many you can solve! (Italics denote landmarks outside Detroit proper)
1). Pretty Knoll Mellows Teenagers
2). Enormous Metropolitan Rift
3). Most Seating
4). Gargantuan Ubiquitous Touristtrap
5). Pointless Structure
6). Timeless Salute
7). Diego's Interesting Application
8). Wide Accessway
9). Adjoins Borders
10). Musical Harmony, United, Sounds Amazing
11). July Lacks Action
12). Rebirth Columns
13). Hoedown Place
14). Hank's Family Monument Goes Vintage
15). Discover Secrets Complex
16). Forever Failures
17). Delays, Weather Changes, McNamara's Arrogance
18). Downtown's Opulent Harmonics
19). Edible Montage
20). Downward Water Transit
21). Beautiful Interlude
22). Statue Overlooking Downtown
23). Massive Chaotic Disaster
24). Wonderful Water Monument
25). Fantastic Red Company
26). Pistons Ornate Arena Home
27). Make Sure and Save Memories
28). Fantastic Beauty
29). Downtown's Pointless Monorail
30). Clueless Pussycats
Send me your guesses. I will say that there are some inside jokes in here for the natives, so if you don't get all of them and you're not from round here, don't feel bad.
Random Simpsons Quote:
Adam: Look, guys. I got a Springfield spoon for my spoon collection.
The Edge: Aw, 'ere we go...
Bono: How many spoons have you got now, Adam?
Adam: Nine. If I didn't have my spoons, I'd go insane.
Bono: Can I see it?
[Adam hands him the spoon; Bono promptly throws it behind his head.]
Adam: My spoon!
[the spoon lands on the head of Mr. Burns, who is seated directly behind The Edge.]
Mr. Burns: [muttering] Wankers.
--"Trash of the Titans"
Today's Phrase that Can Never Lead to Any Good:
"The name issue could be a subject of discussion at the company's board meeting next month, one source said, but added, "It's premature to say at this point.""
AOL Time Warner May Lop 'AOL' from Name
Today's Installment of "I'm shocked. Shocked..."
Davis Calls Recall an 'Insult' to Voters
That's all for today, until tomorrow,
I am Craig Barker, searching low and high.
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